Not Sure What to Do

[DarkEmber]

Hey everyone, I'm a 24 year old girl going into nursing in the fall, and honestly, I'm not entirely sure what to do with a suspicion I've had for years.

I'm fairly certain I have Aspergers Syndrome. I've always known SOMETHING was wrong with me, and after sifting through so many possible things to describe how I've felt, Aspergers honestly just clicks in almost all the ways.

My dilemma, is whether or not I want to pursue getting diagnosed. I'm worried about a couple different scenarios. One, is I'm going into nursing school, a career that is based around patient care, and while I'm sure I'd be good at it (I've always been good with medical topics) I'm worried a diagnosis would... be a black mark on what otherwise seems like a model student. I'm worried that if I do have Aspergers, and get diagnosed with it, then it'll bite me harder than if I just let it remain a mystery.

On the other hand though, getting diagnosed would open up so many avenues to potentially help further improve myself.

What should I do? Does anyone have any advice for someone unsure whether getting the formal diagnosis is worth it?

 

[Juliettaa]

Hello and welcome.

You're likely to get mixed responses on this one.

For me, a formal diagnosis was an absolute must.

For many others on this forum (and beyond) they're happy with 'self diagnosis'.

It's all down to personal choice, deciding what is best for you.

One thing to bear in mind - it's not compulsory to disclose a diagnosis. I have only told people on a 'need to know' basis. For example, my colleagues don't know but senior managers do. This is because there's no benefit to me in my colleagues knowing but management are able to implement 'reasonable adjustments'.

I've always known SOMETHING was wrong with me,

There's nothing wrong with you; we're different, not wrong

 

[DarkEmber]

Hello and welcome.

For many others on this forum (and beyond) they're happy with 'self diagnosis'.

I suppose I'm also worried that simply self diagnosing would be in some way wrong? How can I explain it, umm...

Even now I'm running a blank on WHY it worries me. Partially because what if I'm wrong in my suspicions, and now I'm taking the mantle of a diagnosis I never was supposed to have? Gah, wording it feels absolutely impossible, But I'm just worried that doing so feels like I'm... being offensive in some way?

It's all down to personal choice, deciding what is best for you.

I'm personally alright with even avoiding the formal diagnosis, even if I'll always be curious about it, I just always fear that deciding to not go down the proper channels will somehow invalidate me in the eyes of others, and there's always the chance that I'm just plain wrong. It's all that worry and back and forth that's bringing my head to a standstill

 

[Major Tom]

Hi welcome!

 

[Isadoorian]

Welcome to the Forums! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay in the process!

There's absolutely nothing wrong with Self Diagnosing. Many here are Self Diagnosed with Autism because they either don't have the $ to get an Official one, or they don't want to bother with all the red tape, waiting, and socialising that's necessary. I myself am Self Diagnosed and strongly believe both Self and Official Diagnoses of Autism to be extremely valid.

You won't be judged here either; many have been in your situation.

 

[SusanLR]

If you self diagnos and are pretty confident you are, it shouldn't get in the way of pursuing your career.
There are a lot of on-line tests that are very accurate and much like getting an official testing.
If you try some of them and get high scores that you probably are, you probably are.
You'll learn a lot about yourself by doing some of the tests and do some studying on the subject.

Most people get an official diagnosis when they are very young and might need special education or
help with life subjects in general. Some also for financial help if it is disabeling.
But, if it isn't interferring with your life or how you socialise or living comfortably, I, myself would see
no need to go through the testings and interviews needed for an official diagnosis.

Welcome to the forums.
I'm sure you are feeling you have Asperger traits, so this is a good place to learn and talk with others.

 

[Autistamatic]

I'll be straight with you. Yes some people will not take a person's autism seriously without a diagnosis. These include medical professionals, government bodies and employers. When it comes to private individuals, those who get heated about self diagnosis tend to be intolerant of a great many things the rest of us would be OK about, so it depends whether the opinions of such people matter to you

And I'll reiterate the point above. If you are autistic it does not mean there's anything WRONG with you, any more than being male, female, black, white, gay, straight or owning a Richard Clayderman LP means you are deficient.

 

[shysnail]

What avenues are you hoping will open up if you get a formal diagnosis? People have mixed experiences, I'm sure, but it generally seems that there's limited help for autistic adults. I wonder what difference there would be for you if you sought help by telling a therapist or wherever you go, "Hey, I struggle with X, Y and Z," versus, "Hey, I'm autistic." You don't necessarily need an official label to receive the help you seek.

Not saying you shouldn't get an official diagnosis, but as @Isadoorian said, you're not going to be excluded from the autistic community for taking something that doesn't belong to you if you self-diagnose. Lots of people do because it just makes more sense for them.

 

[Juliettaa]

I suppose I'm also worried that simply self diagnosing would be in some way wrong? How can I explain it, umm...

I think I understand what you mean. It really is down to personal choice though and only you can decide what's best for you.

I'll be straight with you. Yes some people will not take a person's autism seriously without a diagnosis. These include medical professionals, government bodies and employers.

Wholeheartedly agree with this.

I have witnessed diagnosed people with autism discount self diagnosis.

I have also been asked on more than one occasion to provide proof of my autism.

On the other hand though, getting diagnosed would open up so many avenues to potentially help further improve myself.

What are your expectations? What are these potential avenues for self improvement?

I'm in the UK and the post diagnostic support around health and well-being, whether an NHS diagnosis or privately funded assessment and subsequent diagnosis, is a BIG FAT ZERO. NADA. ZILCH.

 

[Tom]

Many here on this forum, myself included are only self diagnosed. I'll just share some general thoughts. Some might pursue a diagnosis at some point, and others will not. With adult HFA the decision it is mainly going to be the result of your own self assessment of what would be best for you. Some elements of self assessment are reading up and studying the condition and it's symptoms, doing online self tests, perhaps interacting with others on the spectrum (that was very useful for me personally) and eliminating other possibilities. One thing to keep in mind is with HFA not all have all the symptoms. There is a lot of individual variation. Autism also often comes with so called 'co-morbids' such as anxiety and depression. Some have official diagnoses for these but not the autism itself. While there is no medication per se for autism, there are for many of the co-morbid conditions.

 

[Judge]

Welcome to AF.

That's actually quite a complex question under such circumstances. I suppose the first question I would have that may have the most bearing on it all is to ask what country you reside in. It can make a great deal of difference in terms of what type and quality of healthcare one has, and what your government and society's response to autism in general may be.

IMO Great Britain is likely to take care of its autistic members of society to a greater degree than other nations. Certainly more than the United States collectively speaking. Apart from a complete mess of an alleged "healthcare system", the US is horribly steeped in the stigmatization of just about any mental or neurological condition. Further complicated by a mentality that reflects conditions like autism as something involving care and treatment pertinent only to children rather than adults. A complete failure to recognize the obvious. That autistic children grow up to be autistic adults. For the minor amount of care one state might provide over another, when you hit the age of eighteen, don't expect much more assistance if any.

If you do some research within this site, you're likely to come across a great many of us with the consensus of being terribly cautious of whom you choose to tell that you are on the spectrum of autism. That your best bet in general is to keep it on a "need-to-know" basis only. Otherwise you are likely to encounter everything from disappointment to outright shock at the negative responses you may get, regardless of how close you view such people.

I am also self-diagnosed. Something I stumbled onto literally by accident at the age of 55. I have chosen not to seek any formal diagnosis, mostly because I don't see any advantage in doing so given I'm retired. And legally speaking it's not like the American Disabilities Act has any provisions to truly protect workers on the spectrum of autism. I also see no reason that I would be eligible for any sort of government entitlements. Plus I learned the hard way in telling the few trusted people in my social orbit. Where my brother seemed to totally get it, and my closest cousin did not at all, remaining somewhat hostile towards me over it.

One thing I will say about most anyone who may be on the spectrum employed in a professional medical capacity. That they have the potential to do us great justice in the future. The possibility of the formal input of those actually on the spectrum of autism rather than to rely only on the professional feedback of those who can only relate to our neurological being from a third person perspective.

For now...be careful with such considerations. And when in doubt, keep it all on a "need-to-know" basis only. Though in terms of how you personally relate to the possibility of your own autism, remember that being different or misunderstood does not necessarily translate into being deficient.

 

[tlc]

To the OP, I have the same concerns so that's one reason I don't pursue official diagnosis. (Other reasons are costs, lack of local doctors, and lack of resources if I was to get a diagnosis. I wouldn't gain anything from it.) WE know that we are just wired differently and are ok people. But I'm certain there are plenty of people out there who are misinformed or ignorant about it, who could take it the wrong way and overreact. And with the ever-increasing access to personal information, I think it would inevitably end up in the hands of the wrong people.

With self diagnosis I think you can get the best of both worlds. You are informed so you can benefit from resources of great help such as this forum. But if anyone has a problem with it, you can always say no because hey you don't have anything official from a doctor to show it.

Bottom line is you are who you are, official diagnosis or not. So do what works best for you. And at least me, I know myself better than any doctor would. I've been to countless doctors for physical ailments, and a few mental ones too over the years.