I've spent a lot of my life not revealing my feelings. Not telling someone how I feel about them, making it seem as if I didn’t feel anything at all. If someone was clear about how they felt about me, I could easily reveal I had similar feelings. But otherwise, if I had to make the first move, I got caught in my head, to the point where I didn't say anything.
It's not typically male to let the woman make the first move. It is rare to be asked out. But I always liked it when it happened. Anything else and I just felt overwhelmed by it all. I had to let go of the idea that I could make it obvious I was interested in someone. The best I could do was get to know them, as a work colleague. But the trouble with that is, at least for me, it interferes with the possibility there may be a more intimate connection possible. I could’t move from friend to relationship. I didn’t know how. I could’t help acting platonically even when I felt I wanted something more.
It’s a protection mechanism. The moment I'd give my heart away, I am on the road to heartache.
The idea of falling in love is great, and yet it usually becomes an issue. I lose something of myself because I need to adjust and adapt to the difference in the other person, as it makes it easier to be around them.
I always need time to reveal myself, so it requires a good level of communication first if anything more is going to happen. Talking to someone in the virtual world makes more sense to me, on a number of levels.
It's not typically male to let the woman make the first move. It is rare to be asked out. But I always liked it when it happened. Anything else and I just felt overwhelmed by it all. I had to let go of the idea that I could make it obvious I was interested in someone. The best I could do was get to know them, as a work colleague. But the trouble with that is, at least for me, it interferes with the possibility there may be a more intimate connection possible. I could’t move from friend to relationship. I didn’t know how. I could’t help acting platonically even when I felt I wanted something more.
It’s a protection mechanism. The moment I'd give my heart away, I am on the road to heartache.
The idea of falling in love is great, and yet it usually becomes an issue. I lose something of myself because I need to adjust and adapt to the difference in the other person, as it makes it easier to be around them.
I always need time to reveal myself, so it requires a good level of communication first if anything more is going to happen. Talking to someone in the virtual world makes more sense to me, on a number of levels.