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My sister and her aspie love

Discussion in 'Help and Support' started by Dorkasour, Jun 7, 2019.

  1. Dorkasour

    Dorkasour Active Member

    Feb 17, 2018
    I've been going through immense amounts of stress and really wanted to reach out to you guys for support.

    My sister used to post on this website all the time for support as she was in love with someone who is has autism. He was her professor through college and she fell deeply in love with him for about two years. They met before class often and sometimes after class. They spoke often and the genuinely thought they had chemistry and they he loved her back.

    Sometime last year she confessed her feelings for him and they went out to dinner. The dinner went really well however afterwards he messaged her that he was not interested.

    This had a pretty dramatic impact on her. She entered a deep relentless depression that eventually led to psychosis. At first she told me she was dating her professor and I believed her but things progressively got stranger. She started claiming she was possessed by demons and angels. She would often speak as the professor; acting as him. As her professor she would say horrific, mean things to me about how much she didn't love me. When we hung out in person she would say my eyes were black and that I was possessed by a demon. She would say the same of her mother. One day she even threatened to kill me because the claimed I was Lucifer.

    This went on for two months and it was a long and horrifying process in getting her help. Eventually we got her to a hospital which was nearly impossible because no matter what circumstances the police won't help you unless the patient is a threat to themselves and other people.

    She got on meds and for some time she seemed ok. Depressed but ok. She broke up with her professor.

    However, 2 weeks ago she entered psychosis again. I don't know what happened but she talks to herself, sees things that aren't there, she laughs loudly to herself. Currently she thinks people are following her, she thinks the police are surrounding her apartment, she thinks the FBI is working with her. She has punched large holes through her door.

    Currently there is absolutely nothing I can do. I've already called the police twice. I've begged her to go to the hospital. However because she isn't a threat to herself or others I can't involuntarily commit her anywhere.

    She loved this website often and posted here often and I am so sorry that she hasn't.
    • Friendly Friendly x 4
  2. Bolletje

    Bolletje Overly complicated potato V.I.P Member

    Jan 3, 2017
    I don’t have anything to offer you but my sympathies. This must be a terribly stressful and scary time for you. Best of luck in dealing with this situation.
  3. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

    Jan 7, 2015
    As an Aspie, autism is about all I know as far as conditions are concerned. But it sounds something like what I have heard concerning schizophrenia but that is just a wild guess on my part. But I do know it would be very difficult/frightening being in your shoes. Do you know if she is still on a medication and if she is taking it? If she is supposed to be on one, and isn't, may explain the increase in symptoms. I don't know how one goes about it but getting her back in treatment with a doctor seems of primary importance. If you know what her diagnosis is perhaps there are other sites that specialize in that condition and might provide better suggestions.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  4. GadAbout

    GadAbout Well-Known Member

    Dec 20, 2018
    If she threatens to kill you (or anyone else) again, that is actionable by the police. First, a death threat is a crime in itself; I believe it is considered fourth degree assault. Second, it constitutes being a danger to (self or) others, which is all that is needed for a temporary commitment. Nobody likes being dragged to a mental hospital against their will, but it sounds like she badly needs containment.

    I'm sorry this has happened to your family.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  5. Xerces Blue

    Xerces Blue Evil Overload

    Feb 17, 2014
    Honestly I don't see how her being unhinged from reality relates to her autistic love interest who rejected her.
    He was probably doing her a favor by telling her he wasn't interested in her, a clear answer early in the relationship is much easier than resentment and legal proceedings later.
    It's unfortunate that the stress of this break up pushed her over the edge, But it probably would have happened anyway - the straw that broke the camel's back as they say.
    I don't see how autism or aspergers is involved in any meaningful way.

    So I'm wondering what you're looking for here.
    Some may consider this a harsh response,
    but without understanding what you're looking for I can't help you.
    • Agree Agree x 3
  6. H-Kath

    H-Kath Active Member

    Apr 21, 2019
    Has she been diagnosed with anything? Does she have a clinician or social worker that you can reach out to? This could be a few different things. I've had to call a clinic's crisis line to help someone with DID. There was surprisingly little that could be done even with a suicide threat (I'm in the U.S.) because there wasn't a plan we knew of being carried out. We were able to locate them through the police and get them home safely, so there's that at least.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  7. shysnail

    shysnail Well-Known Member

    May 14, 2019
    Can you reach out to the hospital where she stayed before the previous time she was having a mental health crisis? They may be able to advise. It is a common thing for family to feel helpless when someone is going through a mental health episode. It can be scary when psychosis is part of the picture, as that is something a lot of people haven't experienced themselves so it's harder to see what your sister might be feeling.

    If the hospital can't help you, is there a mental health helpline or charity that you could contact? They may not be able to do much more than offer advice, but at least it's something and it's helpful to talk to people experienced in what you're currently encountering with your sister.
  8. Lysander

    Lysander Well-Known Member

    Sep 21, 2014
    Yeah, after reading everything you said that's happening, I would be frickin stressed out too.

    I was admitted due to suicidal ideation and eventually diagnosed with a temporary psychotic episode once as a teenager, but that was after the fact. I think it may have been because I told the hospital staff about how they were **** at their jobs haha. But back to the point, from what I understand about psychosis, it usually develops during early adulthood (17-24). Is this her age range? You don't have to answer here.

    On one hand, your sister needs help, on the other hand, admitting her to a hospital may or may not help her psychosis. If you could be a fly on a wall for a day, you would be disappointed to witness your sister not being fed consistently, not wearing clean clothes, and being threatened with physical harm by staff. A sometimes necessary, but certainly not perfect solution.

    Medication would benefit her, but she must meet regularly with a psychiatrist to establish the right med, at the best dosage.
    • Agree Agree x 1