Mother's day card dilemma.....

[Aspychata]

So our relationship has progressed, though l have no idea where but that being said, l was scratching my head at all the equally inappropriate card choices.
You are the best Mom ever, umm no. I actually mentioned,( more like unloaded), the #special relationship # she had with my brother recently. It was received with no backlash. What a relief. But it felt good to finally express it and let it go. So we still aren't super close, but she has started to see maybe somethings about my ex. He did a excellent snow job on her, as he did on me.

What type of Mother Day cards would you like to see? Ex: mother's day reminds me you need a therapist. What cards are missing? Feel free to post positive messages!

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Oh just get her a nice card with flowers on it and write "I love you Mom" and it'll make her day.

 

[Aspychata]

Oh just get her a nice card with flowers on it and write "I love you Mom" and it'll make her day.

Sounds like you have a excellent relationship with your mom.☺ l was looking for the card that said ?are you sure you are my mother? Maybe hospital mixup?

 

[Nitro]

I would love to still have a mother to give a card too, but my pink warrior lost her valiant fight.

You have two choices, one being to suck up your past ill memories and be the bigger person, or the other is to blow her off.
Choose wisely.

 

[Aspychata]

I would love to still have a mother to give a card too, but my pink warrior lost her valiant fight.

You have two choices, one being to suck up your past ill memories and be the bigger person, or the other is to blow her off.
Choose wisely.

Sorry Nitro to hear of this.

Mother's can be a sensitive topic for some, so l am hoping to open up some dialogue for the others like me that have complications that are extreme.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Sounds like you have a excellent relationship with your mom.☺ l was looking for the card that said ?are you sure you are my mother? Maybe hospital mixup?

Naw it's not the best relationship at all. But it's just a nice thing to do. Suck it up and get a nice card and leave it at that.

Let's say someone has a brother that's a meth head and Schizophrenic. Maybe they've told them they don't want to see him except on holidays. But inevitably, they will be together often. When they're together, the person tries to be nice as possible, even when he's very mentally unstable. That's kind of what you have to do.

It's just one day a year. Buy the card. Say I love you. Because someday you'll be old and there'll be no one left from your life. Only you and your memories and regrets.

 

[Aspychata]

Naw it's not the best relationship at all. But it's just a nice thing to do. Suck it up and get a nice card and leave it at that.

Let's say someone has a brother that's a meth head and Schizophrenic. Maybe they've told them they don't want to see him except on holidays. But inevitably, they will be together often. When they're together, the person tries to be nice as possible, even when he's very mentally unstable. That's kind of what you have to do.

It's just one day a year. Buy the card. Say I love you. Because someday you'll be old and there'll be no one left from your life. Only you and your memories and regrets.

We are already old, either one of us can hit the dirt any day now. I moved across country to be near her, that's better then a card.☺ l am a little frighten that l may lose her. ☹ l am scared that this panademic may cause her to be depressed.

This thread was more to hear from other posters since mother's day can actually be somewhat of a trigger for us.

 

[unperson]

Mine was more of a gestational carrier than a mother, but eh she had a horrible early life, grew up in orphanages, jilted at the altar, lol, poor old mum, not a happy person .

'I'm sorry for your your loss' would be the most appropriate card I think.

 

[unperson]

I don't like greeting card companies deciding what days or people are important. 50 years ago the rest was no Mother's Day, Valentine's Day etc (here) but it's amazing how quickly these things get institutionalised.

 

[Nitro]

Sorry Nitro to hear of this.

Mother's can be a sensitive topic for some, so l am hoping to open up some dialogue for the others like me that have complications that are extreme.

What it all boils down to and matters is what you feel in your own heart, unless you want perfect strangers be your guiding hand

I will offer nothing more to this conversation.

 

[Aspychata]

What it all boils down to and matters is what you feel in your own heart, unless you want perfect strangers be your guiding hand

I will offer nothing more to this conversation.

Thanks. Not really asking for guidance, more a chance for other posters to talk about what mother's day means to them since we all walk different paths, and it's good to talk about this. But l always appreciate all your excellent contributions and hope you and family are well during these times.

 

[Mia]

I usually would have gotten in the past, a card with 'Happy Mother's Day' written on the front, and I'd write something inside. Usually some sort of newsy message about things going on at the time. When I did send them, years ago.

 

[Thinx]

I know what you mean, we already had Mother's day here in UK, and as usual I struggled to find one that was gonna fit the bill. I always send 2 actually, one from the cat who tends to get her one saying Grandma. Its hard to find any that don't gush and thank the person for being wonderful, and really some parents whilst not being actively abusive are sadly lacking.

The onus has been on me to maintain the relationship, but my mother doesn't realise that or that relating works two ways. It has always been about parenting her, and my dad was similarly in need of emotional support and parenting. I grew up a mini social worker despite my high autistic traits making me somewhat straining to fill the job description.

Some parents are absolutely stars, but also many for all sorts of reasons can't or don't seem able to be there for their kids. It's a spectrum.

 

[Aspychata]

I know what you mean, we already had Mother's day here in UK, and as usual I struggled to find one that was gonna fit the bill. I always send 2 actually, one from the cat who tends to get her one saying Grandma. Its hard to find any that don't gush and thank the person for being wonderful, and really some parents whilst not being actively abusive are sadly lacking.

The onus has been on me to maintain the relationship, but my mother doesn't realise that or that relating works two ways. It has always been about parenting her, and my dad was similarly in need of emotional support and parenting. I grew up a mini social worker despite my high autistic traits making me somewhat straining to fill the job description.

Some parents are absolutely stars, but also many for all sorts of reasons can't or don't seem able to be there for their kids. It's a spectrum.

You understand what l was trying to say. Those cards are super gushy but that's not always case in families with all kinds of issues or where the kids are the parents. In my case, they were absent parents to a huge extent. We supplied a roof and food, we are off the hook as your parents. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. Think a lot of people are afraid to talk about their mother. People that had normal moms, can't relate to others that have no idea what a mother is.

 

[WoodWorkingJoel]

So our relationship has progressed, though l have no idea where but that being said, l was scratching my head at all the equally inappropriate card choices.
You are the best Mom ever, umm no. I actually mentioned,( more like unloaded), the #special relationship # she had with my brother recently. It was received with no backlash. What a relief. But it felt good to finally express it and let it go. So we still aren't super close, but she has started to see maybe somethings about my ex. He did a excellent snow job on her, as he did on me.

What type of Mother Day cards would you like to see? Ex: mother's day reminds me you need a therapist. What cards are missing? Feel free to post positive messages!

Dear mom,
Where's my damned birthday card

 

[SusanLR]

I would love to still have a mother to give a card too, but my pink warrior lost her valiant fight.

Seven years ago for me and this is the only way I can think of Mother's Day too.
They were selling 2 doz. red roses bouquets with white carnations mixed in and I could only think
how I wished I could give them to her.

Sorry this doesn't fit the OP theme. But, it's about how we feel about Mother's Day.

 

[Gracey]

I tend to think sending flowers means they may interpret the offering how they wish.

Not coming from a sense of duty but because you are thinking of them on mothers' day.

A simple note attached reading "thinking of you on mothers day" is enough.

I haven't sent a card for many years. Didn't like the verses and it takes years for a replacement tree to grow. Less recycling waste also.

I'm a mother and being quite practical I truthfully think cut flowers are a waste of time.

Stunning to look at but I'd rather watch the cycle in my garden.
Emerge, bloom, die back, dormant til next spring and so on.

But I will still send cut flowers when I have no idea what to say or what else to gift.

 

[Nitro]

You were the only one understanding what l was trying to say. Those cards are super gushy but that's not always case in families with all kinds of issues or where the kids are the parents. In my case, they were absent parents to a huge extent. We supplied a roof and food, we are off the hook as your parents. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. Think a lot of people are afraid to talk about their mother. People that had normal moms, can't relate to others that have no idea what a mother is.

First of all, a pretty blank card might be in order, or possibly a home made one where you get to decide what to say.
Another approach may be a home cooked meal, possibly dropped off so interaction could be kept to a minimum.
"Think a lot of people are afraid to talk about their mother. People that had normal moms, can't relate to others that have no idea what a mother is."
Yes we can and do understand that you were unhappy with yours, so please stop trying to think for us.
Or they are taking the higher road and letting what happened in the past stay in the rear view mirror instead of digging up bones. Please keep in mind that negative thoughts are an extremely prolific breeder and dig the fastest holes of despair.

All I see is the thread being turned towards negative thoughts from some, not positive input. Placating me for the loss of mine does nothing but highlight your dislike of yours.

You claim to not lose touch with yours, yet you are open to discussing hatred of moms that didn't cut the mustard while pushing away those members who still care about theirs.

It appears to me that once again, you have engaged your readers, yet have made the conversation exclusive to members who have positive thoughts about their own mothers.

 

[ZebraAutismo]

Thanks for doing what you thought was best for me even if you won’t always right.

Thanks for arguing with any teacher who puts me down.

Jokes aside my Mum is great. She carries a lot of guilt about the discussions she made with my brother but she is great. She is fighting her own battles and supporting mi e every day.

 

[GrownupGirl]

I got my mom a card with Snoopy on it that has a window on the front with fuzzy, flocked stripes, and it says "Rub your hand across this. (the stripes) Go ahead, feel right here". And when you open the card it reveals that the stripes are the word LOVE and they're all fuzzy and it says, "Just wanted you to feel the LOVE on Mother's Day".

There doesn't seem to be a market for Mother's Day cards where people have a poor relationship with their mothers since it's supposed to be about showing your mom love and appreciation and stuff.