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Married Autistics, Where Did You Meet Your Spouse...?

Crossbreed

Crossbreed

Neur-D Missionary ☝️
V.I.P Member
At a mall, at work, at a bar, at a concert or other event...? I would like to see if a pattern emerges (or not) for the sake of our lonely singles here.

I will start.

I met her at a small church just outside of my naval base/school.
I was just looking for my style of church, not particularly a wife (though I was not opposed to the latter).
 
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At Grand Valley State University. 2 weeks into our freshman year. After her not so subtle hints in class (dropping pens on the floor near my seat, amongst other things)...we had 3 classes together...Anatomy, Biology, and Chemistry. I rewarded her persistence. I finally got up the nerve to walk with her on the way to class one day to get her first name...not her last name (mistake). Then, shortly afterward, I found out which dormitory she was in. Looked her name up in the directory to call her room from the lobby, only to realize there were 3 other girls with her first name. LOL! No kidding, I called all 3 girls, finally the third one was "my girl". How embarrassing, but funny.
 
My wife’s parents knew my mother from church and set us up.

My wife decided she wasn’t going to mess around with any social games and was going to be as straightforward and honest as possible and too bad for me if I couldn’t handle it.

It turns out that was exactly what I needed because I was never going to be able to navigate the subtleties of typical dating. This was more than 20 years before we found out I’m autistic. I will be always be grateful for her decision to be that way.
 
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I met her when I signed up for a trail maintenance project and on the trip roster she indicated that she would like to share a ride. While she lived 300 miles away in Chicago, I was going to be nearby collecting fossils before the trip. At that time I was still a bit afraid of contacting women, but since it was just transactional for some company on a long drive I was not anxious.

We were talking regularly about gear and preparation and I enjoyed talking to her. She had a beautiful phone voice. Finally it came time to meet the night before when I was couch surfing before we left the next morning. I finished my collecting and the skies opened up turning the strip mine into a festival of mud. I showed up at her doorstep dirty and bedraggled and she ushered me to the shower. She looked nice but all I thought was; so svelte, so clean.

We enjoyed our road trip to the project, stopping off at Mammoth Cave. On our way to the Smoky Mountains the distributor rotor cracked and it would go off timing. I'd have to reset it as we limped to an auto parts store and each time I stopped she would find another tick that she picked up at the MC campground which I would dutifully remove. But, we had a memorable time.

I was so clueless, but finally she gave me some pretty strong hints before we met the rest of the group and I felt so safe with her that I finally professed my love to her after an amazing day in Cades Cove. She gently guided me into our relationship when, after being so bold, my mind panicked and I started to mumble about ruining our friendship, she kindly and patiently made me see that we were taking our friendship to a new dimension. I was her's after that. At the end of the trip, returning home we were lovers in a committed relationship. That was 47 years ago.
 
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Crossbreed said:
At a mall, at work, at a bar, at a concert or other event...? I would like to see if a pattern emerges (or not) for the sake of our lonely singles here.

I will start.

I met her at a small church just outside of my naval base/school.
I was just looking for my style of church, not particularly a wife (though I was not opposed to the latter).
Click to expand...
Online personals site. Her response had the best spelling and grammar.

❤️
 
In my rooming house, just went upstairs knocked on her door asked if she wanted to join me to watch my cousin play with band, she had taken his room when he had moved out. My cousin was surprised to see me bring date to his bands gig. Even changed a lyric to one song to include her name. I did not expect that she was flattered.
 
We both attended the first meeting of the Christian Naturist Fellowship of Florida. She and I were the only singles there. After the formal meeting, most of the group hung out in the pool chatting. When she heard I had a boat, she asked if I could take her son fishing. He had been wanting to go for a while. I told her I would take both of them fishing, but not just her son, since we had just met, and I had not met the son yet.
We arranged to make a weekend out of the fishing and the next meeting of the group the following month. I would stay on board my sailboat at the marina/campground where I had a camper set up for her and her son, fish on Saturday, and attend the meeting on Sunday.
On the way there, she totaled her car. Neither of us had cell phones, so she couldn't call me until hours later from the Emergency Room where they had been taken. Neither had serious injuries, so they were released. I was their only transportation since her car was unusable. It was also towed to a storage yard which was inaccessible till Monday. I took them to a K Mart to get them food and a change of clothes each.
She lived 100 miles from where the accident took place. A couple who attended the second meeting live nearby her place, and they had a large RV so they were able to take her and her son home. I was able to get their belongings from the car during the week, and took them to her the next weekend. We met at her church, and went from there to her house with the belongings.
In the process of all this, we found we liked each other's company. We were married 11 months later.
 
NT's like dinner and date. In my case I just asked my tenant to join me in watching a previous tenant play as this was my thing. Not really a date I had helped her move in had got to know a bit about her. another tenant her close friend who lived on third floor, had turned me down previously as she had a boy friend. Either way still friends. NT's have conventional methods of dating us Aspies just seen to stumble into meeting, our significant others.
 
Ronald Zeeman said:
NT's like dinner and date. In my case I just asked my tenant to join me in watching a previous tenant play as this was my thing. Not really a date I had helped her move in had got to know a bit about her. another tenant her close friend who lived on third floor, had turned me down previously as she had a boy friend. Either way still friends. NT's have conventional methods of dating us Aspies just seen to stumble into meeting, our significant others.
Click to expand...

No, not all NTs like a dinner and date, whatever you may think that is. My first "date" with my now-husband was to go fishing and eat a picnic lunch together.
 
That why I'm an Aspie, my knowledge of NT's is watching movies do not like romance movies, I personally do not like jewellery, do not buy it. Yes we are different. I do not wear a ring wife bought her own.
 
Mary Terry said:
I respectfully disagree. All the scenarios mentioned are conventional among NTs.
Click to expand...
I know no NTs who self rejected like I did many times, who did not have the social maturity to date until I was 26, and still a virgin at 28 when I nearly panicked my way out of the valuable relationship with my spouse.
 
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