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Lurker's Intro :)

AHugNKiss

AHugNKiss

Well-Known Member
Hi, all.

I have been lurking for a few days and feel kinda... wrong not introducing myself even though I *think* my interaction here might be limited (if it even happens at all). At least for the forseeable. As I've kinda 'shut down' but attempting to look to other's experiences to help...

I've kinda jumped ahead. Ok, I'll try and keep it brief and not too confusing!

My five year old son has just been diagnosed ASD (end of June, actually). HFA, specifically. The doctor & SALT were at pains to tell me they think he has a very bright future as he is extremely intelligent but will need significant support with his social development and communication.

It didn't come as a surprise. I have really known from a VERY young age that he was 'different' - he's my third of four children and my older two are 20 and 17 now. It's just a strange line to walk: needing to be right but wanting to be wrong.

Anyway, since I started reading up (a year and a half ago when we started on the diagnosis pathway) I think I see that my older son also has many traits (if he's not indeed on the spectrum) and so do I... although I don't think there's anyone meeting me who would think I was even near the spectrum, let alone on it. I have a very high (MENSA tested) IQ and took drama at school in which I did very well - being other people/what's required can be done, it just doesn't come naturally and is exhausting! But if I had a £1 for all the times my husband says that my diagnosed son is just like me I'd be very rich.

Not sure what I'm saying!

The actual bottom line is that I'm...here. And reading. So, hi. :)
 
AHugNKiss said:
... although I don't think there's anyone meeting me who would think I was even near the spectrum, let alone on it...
Click to expand...

Hi & Welcome,
The way you put that gave me a chuckle. ... But we can see... and we are coming for you AHugNKiss... You belong with us! Muhu Muhuhahahaha!

;):D

I do not think of AS & NT as separate entities. If you go far enough on the spectrum you reach neurotypical and the gray area between.
 
Hi, and welcome to the forum :) I think it's quite common for parents with high IQs or who are gifted to have children on the spectrum, or to find that they have traits themselves when their children are diagnosed.
 
Oh, really, Progster? That's interesting (particularly to me, of course! :D)

I have to say, in my reading, that's not something I've noticed but perhaps it's more of an anecdotal thing that crops up a lot on forums (of which this is my first. Well, first for this subject matter, anyway ;) ) where people are sharing their experience.

Thanks for the welcome:)
 
Hi and welcome to AC.
No one really knows the cause of autism or aspergers yet, but there seems to be a strong genetic link. Diagnosis is usually done in childhood, but when we were kids its was unknown (its also harder to spot in women). So once one is diagnosed, its not uncommon to start seeing traits in other family members, and ourselves. For some this can be a hard realization. For others it gives a sense of relief.
You may find Rudy Simone's "Aspergirls" interesting reading. If you have time, Tony Attwood's "Complete guide to Aspergers" is also very good.
 
Welcome aboard. Glad you have introduced yourself and joined the website. I hope you enjoy it. Best wishes.
image.jpg
 
Hi, and welcome :)

Admittedly I haven't looked too far into it, but in my opinion there must be a genetic link to autism. It's not some random thing that just happens for no reason. E.g. Giftedness is not random. However, I also think there are environmental factors that come into play during pregnancy. Growing babies is complex and exposure to certain chemicals at particular stages of development has varied effects. I'm interested in investigating links between smoking during pregnancy and autism and other outcomes for children, as my own mother smoked throughout both of her pregnancies and both of her children came out rather different!:)

In my case, a year ago I wouldn't have considered myself autistic. (Even now when I've mentioned it to trusted people, they look at me skeptically... I'm a great actress, it seems, :D) Our son, now 6, is gifted and has behavioural troubles, which we were assured is just part of the territory. I was never quite sure that we had been given the whole answer....I've always felt there was something else going on. ADD at least. When I finally stumbled upon autism as the reason for my own inability to cope with my kids, it also led me to look more analytically at my son. I realised that the reason we are so alike is that we are both on the spectrum.

I think there are lots of adults who realise they are also on the spectrum when their kids receive the diagnosis.

AC is a great place to ask questions and get lots of reassurance when you need it. :herb:
 
Yes, it is quite common, it would seem, for parents to find out they have Asperger's subsequent to the diagnosis of their child. Genetic factors have also been identified as playing a role.

I have even heard that Silicon Valley is experiencing something of an "autism crisis" as people with aspergic traits congregate and reproduce, though more recent datta casts doubt on that notion.
 
AHugNKiss said:
Oh, really, Progster? That's interesting (particularly to me, of course! :D)

I have to say, in my reading, that's not something I've noticed but perhaps it's more of an anecdotal thing that crops up a lot on forums (of which this is my first. Well, first for this subject matter, anyway ;) ) where people are sharing their experience.

Thanks for the welcome:)
Click to expand...

I have seen that what Progster is saying also, but in autism research studies. I'll try to dig up something.

Btw there are quite a few members here with high/very high IQs (Not me). But people tend to cycle in and out over unique intervals, like asteroids, so it varies who is around at any given moment (besides the 'regulars' that is... the ones that show up at the bar every night. Like me.:D ). I know I have seen some threads dedicated to it also.
 
Thanks very much Tom, will click through and read them now.

I just took the raads-r and 'scored' 170. All the values were highlighted yellow.
 
(the frustrating part about looking *back* with regards to this theory is that I know nothing of my biological father at all other than a name! My mother, however, is certainly of average intelligence)
 
AHugNKiss said:
(the frustrating part about looking *back* with regards to this theory is that I know nothing of my biological father at all other than a name! My mother, however, is certainly of average intelligence)
Click to expand...

How one gets autism is still much under debate and study. There are a lot of studies on that. But so far no 'smoking gun' per se, and instead a wide variety of factors are considered to be involved. The most evident factor that I am aware of is the hereditary link, but it isn't the only one and several others have been identified as increasing the chances of a child having autism. Some that come to mind are called environmental, such as the mother being in proximity to pesticides and heavy air pollution during the pregnancy. Others are difficulties at birth and advanced age of the father. All these factors, and others can weigh in and at some point you can say it reaches a tipping point and the autism results. It is likely very complicated. So far 100 different genetic areas are identified as participating in the determination. No one has all 100 of the areas configured to more likely produce autism. An autistic will have several of them but everyone has different ones basically. Some may not be directly autistim related, but instead be a variation that will support an autistic result.

It was until recently generally accepted the main factor was heredity. That is under re-evaluation as more evidence is surfacing on environmental factors.

Me personnally, I think the surge in autism is not just better reporting, but real. I think the prime cause of the surge is environmental, the by-product of exposure to pollutions and chemicals in the 20th century (and continuing today). I am not sure but think that an autism caused by say exposure to pesticides can then perpetuate itself in later generations hereditarily, which would increase the numbers by propagation.
 
AHugNKiss said:
Hi, all.

I have been lurking for a few days and feel kinda... wrong not introducing myself even though I *think* my interaction here might be limited (if it even happens at all). At least for the forseeable. As I've kinda 'shut down' but attempting to look to other's experiences to help...

I've kinda jumped ahead. Ok, I'll try and keep it brief and not too confusing!

My five year old son has just been diagnosed ASD (end of June, actually). HFA, specifically. The doctor & SALT were at pains to tell me they think he has a very bright future as he is extremely intelligent but will need significant support with his social development and communication.

It didn't come as a surprise. I have really known from a VERY young age that he was 'different' - he's my third of four children and my older two are 20 and 17 now. It's just a strange line to walk: needing to be right but wanting to be wrong.

Anyway, since I started reading up (a year and a half ago when we started on the diagnosis pathway) I think I see that my older son also has many traits (if he's not indeed on the spectrum) and so do I... although I don't think there's anyone meeting me who would think I was even near the spectrum, let alone on it. I have a very high (MENSA tested) IQ and took drama at school in which I did very well - being other people/what's required can be done, it just doesn't come naturally and is exhausting! But if I had a £1 for all the times my husband says that my diagnosed son is just like me I'd be very rich.

Not sure what I'm saying!

The actual bottom line is that I'm...here. And reading. So, hi. :)
Click to expand...

You could be on the spectrum and not know it. The high IQ and the fact that women can hide it better than the men, due to better social skills amongst female aspies, and women in general.
You also appear to be a very attractive woman, which runs contrary to the preconceived notions that people have of those in the the spectrum. Says the NT (non-aspie).
:) welcome!!
 
camerartus said:
You also appear to be a very attractive woman, which runs contrary to the preconceived notions that people have of those in the the spectrum. Says the NT (non-aspie).
Click to expand...
Interesting. What are the NT perceptions of what an Autie/Aspie looks like?
We often hear 'But you look normal'.
And Aspies are known for looking younger than their years.
But what exactly is the NT perception of what we are supposed to look like?
 
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