Isolation

[Hollow Horse]

Isolation can come and be felt in many forms I guess. Today I went back to the drop-in for the first time in probably a couple of years. I'd not liked someone who went there all the time and it was the main reason I stopped going. It was run by Autism Wessex. You used to get between 25 and 30 people. I liked it because you could do different things like yoga one week and art the next. I liked the people mostly; Siobhan - she loved hoovers and had quite a collection, pictures on her phone and names for all of them. With Michael it was buses.

Today I got there half an hour early and waited listening to music on my ipod. I only recognised a couple of people. And only Ollie was one whose name I could remember. There were nine of the staff that used to be there. I out my round coin in the bowl and signed the book. But there were only eight people there. It had changed its name too, the group. I could not connect or re-connect with anyone or anything there, I felt. So I left and got the two buses back home.

I found the whole thing quite depressing, the same as when I'm on a bus and what music I have will be readable to anyone who just won't have heard of Close Lobsters, that kind of feeling that means you feel totally alienated in the modern world I still choose to live in.

The summer is over and I really hate winter. But the football will see me through as usual. And I have my website that keeps me busy. For some reason my adult social care fell by the wayside and the place where I live is in disarray. But I might be getting a new social worker and a new house cleaner will start on the 20th. Oh and Duchess is good, only she will keep bringing wildlife back that I'm simply not interested in.

Anyway, that's why I posted, like a catch up for the forum I also hadn't visited for a while and had forgotten my log in details. How's everyone else doing?

 

[Shamar]

Isolation can come and be felt in many forms I guess. Today I went back to the drop-in for the first time in probably a couple of years. I'd not liked someone who went there all the time and it was the main reason I stopped going. It was run by Autism Wessex. You used to get between 25 and 30 people. I liked it because you could do different things like yoga one week and art the next. I liked the people mostly; Siobhan - she loved hoovers and had quite a collection, pictures on her phone and names for all of them. With Michael it was buses.

Today I got there half an hour early and waited listening to music on my ipod. I only recognised a couple of people. And only Ollie was one whose name I could remember. There were nine of the staff that used to be there. I out my round coin in the bowl and signed the book. But there were only eight people there. It had changed its name too, the group. I could not connect or re-connect with anyone or anything there, I felt. So I left and got the two buses back home.

I found the whole thing quite depressing, the same as when I'm on a bus and what music I have will be readable to anyone who just won't have heard of Close Lobsters, that kind of feeling that means you feel totally alienated in the modern world I still choose to live in.

The summer is over and I really hate winter. But the football will see me through as usual. And I have my website that keeps me busy. For some reason my adult social care fell by the wayside and the place where I live is in disarray. But I might be getting a new social worker and a new house cleaner will start on the 20th. Oh and Duchess is good, only she will keep bringing wildlife back that I'm simply not interested in.

Anyway, that's why I posted, like a catch up for the forum I also hadn't visited for a while and had forgotten my log in details. How's everyone else doing?

I tried groups several times. It was always a crowd of people (never a good thing for me), run by moderators insisting we were all friends (friends? me?), and all of them saying "Don't listen to that person's problems, listen to my problems." Why bother.

 

[unperson]

Haven't met before but things always change, the scene you like never stays at the same place forever.

Never tried any of those day groups/support things, usually I get classed as not disabled enough. You're probably a bit lucky to have them.

 

[Suzanne]

Could never join a group and if I did, no doubt, when I decide that I cannot cope anymore, I would make one friend, but be clueless on how to further it and since they would be similar....!

But, get what you mean, because anything, even slightly different, truly upsets me.

 

[Judge]

Yes, I had a similar letdown some years ago when I chose to leave a social club after four years of membership. I originally did so just to push myself socially, to keep a foot in the door of the Neurotypical world.

However I came to realize that I was simply getting nothing out of it, even though I did manage to make a few social connections with some nice people.

Or as Edward Cullen would have said, it's like living only on tofu.

<SIGH>

 

[Tom]

You shouldn't be surprised the group has dwindled because people like yourself left.

 

[Hollow Horse]

Some mixed reactions there. That last comment I don't understand at all. But I guess it is fair to say I'm lucky to have somewhere TO go, given resources and funding.

 

[Judge]

But I guess it is fair to say I'm lucky to have somewhere TO go, given resources and funding.

True. But then if the group has evolved and evaporated it's ok for you to have such mixed feelings. Took me four years to realize that I wasn't even getting anything out of socializing in such a group. It happens.

Isolation isn't always a good thing for me, but more often than not it's not a bad thing either. That's ok too.

 

[Hollow Horse]

True. But then if the group has evolved and evaporated it's ok for you to have such mixed feelings. Took me four years to realize that I wasn't even getting anything out of socializing in such a group. It happens.

Isolation isn't always a good thing for me, but more often than not it's not a bad thing either. That's ok too.

I like your way of thinking, Judge.

Warren Zevon has a song called Splendid Isolation - I like that too.