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Increased risk for sexual abuse for adult women

Lady Penelope

Well-Known Member
Does anyone know of any research suggesting a link between asperger traits and increased vulnerability towards the likelihood of sexual assault/ abuse, in particular "grooming"?

Lack of social awareness, no friends, social isolation, desire for friendship, eager to please... no one to notice, no one to tell...

This topic is quite personal and the catalyst for me reading about aspergers in adult women last week and joining the forum a few days ago.
PS.before you read this,i wont go into detail!
im LFA/autie not aspie but i have been sexually abused while living in an intellectual disability institution; we were in the lounge and there were a row of staff sat on the opposite sofas quite far away from me, they were looking at me as a guy i dont like came up and sat next to me,he started doing things and i had no idea what he was doing,with my autie super hearing i overheard the staff say 'just let him get away with it,she hasnt got a clue whats going on', that triggered in me that it must be something bad,so i emailed my sister, to ask what had just happened and she explained it was bad and reported it to the social services,i was non verbal and couldnt report it to anyone directly.
lots of us in there were autistic.
the guy who was abusing me wasnt even intellectually disabled,i remember overhearing the staff say 'm doesnt have learning disability to any degree but he has been released from the pysch ward and has no where else to go.

this guy was diagnosed with severe paranoid schizophrenia, he would come up to me and scream in my face 'im gonna f-king kill you' over and over and some times he would be holding a pint glass or something else heavy over my head,i lived in fear there, all because they let a guy who shouldnt have been there go in.

they knew he was a sexual abuser,i found this out it was on his risk assessment,loads of vulnerable non verbal girls,and he picked on me,the most manliest of them all.

my dad said when he was going home from visiting me,he sometimes saw 'm' get on the bus at the same stop and 'm' would sit next to a young girl and sit on top of her almost and start doing things-he had support staff at all times,but they were at the back all chatting on their phones aparently.
disgusting isnt it?

another time i was sexually abused in an intellectual disability secure hospital, a girl who had quite recently been admitted wanted to feel what it was like to be a lesbian [her own words],despite the fact i was on the highest support level there and had to have a support staff stand wherever i was,they were busy chatting to other staff somewhere else.
i complained to my family about the abuse as i am aware of sexual abuse now,the social services safeguarding team from that county got in contact with me after i left,but they only gave me a week to type down what happened and my feelings around it. a week,so the case got closed down.
Wow, this is terrible! This is why we should teach everyone about sexual abuse as early as possible. Thankfully you realised there was something wrong the first time so it didn't kept on, though I don't think you were the only victim... were the staff charged for this too?
[Trigger warning] personal experiences up ahead. Nothing too graphic, but no happy stories here.

I've had quite a few bad experiences in the past.
Some were due to friends making a move I didn't expect and me being scared to say no more than a few times. Scared of losing friends, scared of being hurt emotionally, or deciding that letting it happen is better than getting beat up and raped.
Some were due to rapists I didn't know.

In both cases I didn't foresee the events. I figured it was probably my fault for giving off the wrong vibes. For a period of time I had one group of friends, all of whom were male. I was a few years younger and thought they were super interesting. I had sex with two of them willingly, because I was in love with them and mistakenly believed we were dating. The rest of them either took advantage of me while I was drunk, bullied me until I gave in, or blatantly raped me. They felt entitled to have sex with me, since I'd had sex with some of their friends too. It took years for me to realize that what happened was not okay. When I finally decided to stand up for myself, they laughed at me, called me a lousy lay and spread rumors in my hometown about me being a disease-ridden whore. Needless to say they're no longer friends.

I've stopped blaming myself. I've gotten a lot more careful and a lot better at reading people. But I'm sad to say I'm no longer comfortable being alone with any man unless I know and trust them, and making new male friends is especially tricky. Which sucks, because I actually like men better than I like women.
Still, I'm lucky. I've mostly recovered from all of it. I have a good relationship and a healthy sex life. I have a few wonderful male friends. I'm usually not afraid to go out alone at night. I hardly have night terrors anymore. It could be much, much worse.
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I was targeted, too. Now I make sure never to talk in public. People think I am weird or stuck up or insane or whatever, but I made it a point to NEVER let anyone else in.

It works. I won't even let anyone try to befriend me. Not that they would want to, but now it's mutual. No one cares and now I don't either.

A good day is a day when I have not spoken a SINGLE WORD to a SINGLE SOUL other than my family.
Was such a naive and childish, honest person. Convent raised, I knew absolutely nothing about sex. I assumed in my twenties that it was normal, and what I was supposed to do. I was terrified most of the time when men attempted to talk to me.

It was in the seventies and eighties that men swarmed, followed me home, in their cars, on the bus and metro, in the clubs and restaurants, followed me into the women's bathroom, the laundry room, the office photocopy room, the college student lounge. I was nervous all the time when this happened. But I was very careful, never putting myself in situations that I was alone with men that I didn't know, even people I thought of as friends or acquaintances. There were other people around, and I stayed with groups of females for protection. Guess that in general I remained aloof and formal most of the time, so that men wouldn't get the wrong impression.

Don't think I was very interested in men that were attracted to me, those relationships didn't last long. Eventually I met someone who I was interested in knowing, and a relationship developed over a long period of time on my terms.
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Thank you for sharing guys. I know it is hard to discuss ... as i am finding myself.
If i had known i had aspergers earlier than a week ago my recent encounter might have been a lot different...

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