Important facts about Gaslighting

[Ylva]

We in particular should know this about the kind of abuse that is made up of lies. It popped up in my facebook feed a year or so ago, and today it resurfaced. Not written by me.

10 Things I've Learned About Gaslighting As An Abuse Tactic - Everyday Feminism

 

[watersprite]

I was a victim of this many years ago. It escalated or rather spread sideways into other forms of abuse as well. It took help from some other people but I got out with my little daughter; and safely away.

I especially appreciate the writer mentioning that the perpetrator doesn't necessarily do it deliberately. ( I would add "at first") They only have to believe they're justified and correct in their relentless efforts towards what they might label adjusting, enlightening, fixing or improving the victim's reality. It is a need for power more than anyhting which drives the abuser.

Another article I found:
Gaslighting: Know It and Identify It to Protect Yourself

 

[FreeDiver]

This almost reminds me of the relationship between me and my mother when I was a teenager. I went through a lot of emotional abuse from her and I never once believed that she did it intentionally. I guess that's one of the reason why I never held a grudge against her.

 

[Judge]

Most definitely an "abuse tactic". Gaslighting as an effective policy of political repression in the Soviet Union. To be a dissident of the Soviet State meant you were mentally ill, apart from a criminal.

Political abuse of psychiatry in the Soviet Union - Wikipedia

 

[Bro'Freak]

I feel it's part of the UK Establishments toolbox, especially if you look at the storm developing around the DWP PiP cuts that are inbound.

 

[DudBomb]

This almost reminds me of the relationship between me and my mother when I was a teenager. I went through a lot of emotional abuse from her and I never once believed that she did it intentionally. I guess that's one of the reason why I never held a grudge against her.

I can relate, except I'm 39 and it is still happening. I also don't think she does it intentionally.
Reminds me of a Wayne Dyer book "Pulling Your Own Strings". He talks about how people who want control make you constantly explain your actions. So that they can judge what you did wrong, what you should or shouldn't have done. Because of coarse, they know best. This happens a lot. I just try to remind myself that for her to be that way she must have gone through some pretty bad stuff in her life. It doesn't excuse the behavior, but it does seem to soften the blow.

 

[Bro'Freak]

people who want control make you constantly explain your actions. So that they can judge what you did wrong, what you should or shouldn't have done. Because of coarse, they know best. This happens this a lot. I just try to remind myself that for her to be that way she must have gone through some pretty bad stuff in her life. It doesn't excuse the behavior, but it does seem to soften the blow.

This reminds me of my ex & how I deal with the memories, she always sat in judgement. Blaming others & making a problem where one didn't exist, it was her forte. I also feel that it was from a past trauma that this behaviour arose. I don't blame her, in fact I do still care for her immensely & possibly always will, as I do understand her past.

 

[pax]

This was one of my mother's manipulation tactics, and she does it intentionally. She is seriously ****ed up. The only way out was to go no contact, because I ended up hating myself and questioning my sanity.