• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

I’m very scared of showing my face.

Welcome to the Forum Jason. I cant say that I recognise myself in the symptoms you describe, but there are many folks on the forum and perhaps someone else will recognise what you describe
 
Many people have something that makes them anxious. Why it is one thing or another may just be the luck of the die roll.
 
I'd rather not have anything said by strangers in public about my looks. Even compliments.
I feel rather off guard in trying to think of a response. Usually it is just a thank you.
Tonight this happened at WaWa when getting coffee and a donut.
The young man at the cash register said he liked my necklace, (a spider), even though he was
afraid of spiders.
I automatically said Thanks, but it reminded me of my feelings and I told him I was the same.
Afraid of spiders yet I have a fetish about collecting all things spiders that I find.
Necklaces, trinkets, toys, real ones in acrylic,etc.

Yeah, he gave me a funny look. Oh, well.
Made me think of another odd thing I like to collect: Skulls. Sugar skulls, macabre skulls, clothing with them
printed on the fabric, etc. Don't know why.

I am used to getting compliments on my hair all the time. So I'm used to that and say Thank you.
I keep it a rather copperish ombre red, shoulder length and straight. People seem to really like it.
Guess I'm just strange.
xmas2019 008.JPG
 
Hi Jason, welcome. Yes I would have felt like that at your age, definitely. And I thought of it as shyness, people didn’t understand about autistic traits or Aspergers being a factor, back then. So I coped as best I could, but I was usually able to make a friend or 2, enough to get by. I did a lot of therapy on and off, and that was helpful, I met a lot of nice people in therapy groups and did useful work on myself.

Knowing about autistic traits or Aspergers has been helpful to me in developing more strategies. You are at quite a full on time of life, so this is an important issue for you. I hope you find useful support here, it's a friendly place.

:spiralshell::spoutingwhale::whale::dolphin::spiralshell::spoutingwhale::whale::dolphin::spiralshell:
 
It’s been a bother to me I get anxious when someone makes comments about my appearance even when they're compliments. Do you guys suffer a similar issue?
I don't know if it would change with age or without experience I used to feel the same way as you you for some reason no it's just meaningless it could be to do with panic disorder I would still swap not having panic disorder in a heartbeat
 
Made me think of another odd thing I like to collect: Skulls...
I have life-size, plastic replicas of a skull, a skeletal hand, foot & 1:6 scale skeleton, but I have them for the medical study side of figure drawing. (The skull even came with drill-able/fill-able teeth for dentists to practice on.)
 
I stopped wearing shirts with anything on them because of this, to avoid compliments for my shirts!
 
I hated myself for a long time, think it's due to emotional neglect. My parents did a great number on my head. Now in this old age, l find peace now.
 
I don't think this is related to Aspergers. I hear a lot of people don't know how to take a compliment and the suggestion is always the same...just say thank you and move on. No need for any drama.

Also, aspies need to try to stand out in the crowd a little because it provides us an opportunity to connect with people in a positive and casual way. A great t-shirt connects us to like minded people, for instance. Think of compliments as a way to be acknowledged by society.
 
I find as l age, l don't want to stand out, l like to roll out, zip thru, get my errands done and zip back home and contemplate the weather or something else totally mundane.
 
I am VERY anxious about talking ever especially online. I hate speaking because my tone of voice is quite gross. i dont even get how i manifested it and if i could get surgery to change it, i would
 
I am VERY anxious about talking ever especially online. I hate speaking because my tone of voice is quite gross. i dont even get how i manifested it and if i could get surgery to change it, i would
Your voice never sounds the same to you as to other people. A recording of your voice never sounds like your real voice. I've never heard a "gross" voice in my entire life.
 
Your voice never sounds the same to you as to other people. A recording of your voice never sounds like your real voice. I've never heard a "gross" voice in my entire life.

I've wondered about this. Why wouldn't your recorded voice be your actual voice (ie the voice that everyone hears)? When a person listens to a recording of their own voice, doesn't it sound distorted, different, weird, etc to them because they hear their own voice in a distorted way?
 
When a person listens to a recording of their own voice, doesn't it sound distorted, different, weird, etc to them because they hear their own voice in a distorted way?
We hear our own voice in two ways,
  1. from our mouths to our ears AND
  2. from our vocal chords, through our skulls.
Voice Confrontation, Greg Foot

I've gotten compliments on my [baritone, and younger] singing voice, so it just is what it is.

(FYI, we don't SEE ourselves the same way that others do, either. Mirrors reverse our asymmetrical features to us.)
 
Last edited:
I don't think I've ever been complimented on my appearance. Sometimes I get compliments on my clothes (like my Attack on Titan sweater), but that makes me panic a little because I suddenly have to choose between attempting a conversation or just saying "thanks" and maybe come off as rude.

I was born with a condition that left my face somewhat underformed. This led to a lot of bullying, which led to serious self-esteem issues, which is probably why I'm uncomfortable around mirrors and video chat. I'm kind of getting better at accepting my appearance, though.
 
It’s been a bother to me I get anxious when someone makes comments about my appearance even when they're compliments. Do you guys suffer a similar issue?

Hi Jason and welcome to the forum. You're sounds like an anxiety about being put on the spot? I have felt that at times. Maybe practising how to respond would help?

I like this approach:
just say thank you and move on

The other reason it could be is if you've experienced a person who gave you compliments but then also said awful things about you (confusing and damaging). That would be a different matter altogether.
 
Not in real life. Can't get around that. Unless you want to wear a mask everywhere. But I think it's a bad idea to post your likeness online.

You know, due to the interconnected nature of the net, what you say or reveal about yourself, may be sufficient to track you down, and with a series of searches, a person may find your photo. It happens.

But I don't advocate lying, or misrepresentation though. Just be careful about what you upload to the net.

Not that I advocate paranoia.

Worry Reaction GIF by MOODMAN

But have people forgot about Edward Snowden ! Biometrics and government supercomputers are tracking all of us! right now, this very moment !!!
 

New Threads

Top Bottom