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I got an email from my 19 year old self this morning... (WARNING! Cringe! And cussing!)

iamlindsaythatisall

iamlindsaythatisall

Tomorrow's just your future yesterday
Subject Line: Holy [deleted]. I have so much to tell you.

Message:
Blue + italics means I just added it.
Suup,
As of right now, I am still questioning who I am, who I want to be, where I want to go...you know...the basic college student [deleted] we all have to go through. Anyway, I'm just wanting to remind you of who you were when you wrote this email. At this point, I do not want kids. I mean DO NOT! You do love Rowynn (kid I used to babysit), though. She's probably my best friend right now, and she's 4.

I'm still pretty angsty, but I still see the good things in life. I am a little afraid I'll become a bitter woman if I keep working at the [place of work that would reveal too much], but hopefully I still remember the good things in life...I am an English major right now, but I am still debating even finishing school. The only thing that's keeping me there right now is my family. I just don't see the point in it sometimes. Haha...I have a bunch of theories about, well...everything haha. I can predict things well, too...it gets kind of ridiculous haha.

Everything in my life right now just seems so routine. I feel like everything is flashing before my eyes and I'm missing it. I never took the time out of my life growing up to REALLY enjoy things (until now, when I have the chance) and actually appreciate the time I had. Becoming an adult sucks...I'm only 19 right now, but I feel like I'm 60. I feel like I know everyone, and have seen everything in this town. I would loooove to get out more often. I recently had gone to a Dropkick and Flogging Molly concerts. [deleted] AWESOME! It would have been more fun if I were 21, though...at least I was with Rachel! She's awesome. I wish I was better friends with her...Sarah and Aaron were there, too! We had a blast. I never want to forget it.

What else...well, I feel very different from the majority of people. I think differently, I guess. I can be pretty introverted. I also [partook in inhaling burnt herb]. Hell yeah, man! It's kind of what broke me out of what I had used to be. I find it hard to look back at who I used to be. I have changed A LOT this past year. I have definitely opened my eyes to the rest of the world. As I am sitting here, I am thinking to myself, "I hope I don't change much from who I am today..." I like who I am, for the most part right now...it's hard to fully be who I am with anyone around here. It seems like I always have to keep a secret from somebody...I just want one person that I can be COMPLETELY open with. You still have not found that. Not even within your family, so I decided to talk to...me. I know that is sounding really lame and melancholy, but it is true. I'm feeling very restricted. If I could start over somewhere else, I would in a [deleted] heartbeat, but, obviously, that's not how things work.

High school was terrible for me, and sometimes I just want to [deleted] forget it ever happened, but then I realize I wouldn't be who I am today if that didn't happen. I'm just glad that I am one out of a few who is able to learn from their mistakes instead of ignoring them or acting like it never happened. I know I was stupid, and I never want it to happen again. At this point in my life, I don't believe love exists. Love is made up, except within a family. That [deleted] is real. Throughout the past 2 or 3 years, I've been realizing more and more how much my family really means to me. They are the only ones who will always love me for who I am, and will always be by my side, and I would do the same for them. It started when grandma was first diagnosed with a glioblastoma. Her death really got to everyone. Grandma Jane was amazing. I am proud to be her granddaughter. That's another thing, even though I will be angry sometimes, or will complain about something, I will always see a good side in something. I don't like to let [deleted] get me down. Yeah, my grandma dies, but I'm going to look further than that to remember the great times and the great things about her. Dwelling is dumb. You can't get anywhere dwelling on things. The world doesn't stop just because you want to sit and dwell. Things keep moving. Everybody has a bottom, that's kind of where you have to go to actually get the directions to the top. It's really late right now, so I am going to go to sleep. I just hope that you remember that I hate politics, the gov't in general, the people, but I still deal with them, and [k]now how.

Also, it's okay to make mistakes. Just remember to learn from them. And don't ever forget that I don't believe in God. (no offense to anyone) That is actually something important to me. I don't mind, and don't judge, others for disagreeing with me, but I would be disappointed in myself if I changed my views on that. Maybe I could send you a different email some other time...who knows.

Live long and prosper
May the force be with you
ALLONS-Y
Tomorrow's just your future yesterday
<3

This was just so weird to receive on my birthday... I do not remember writing it. I figured I could share it with you all since I think you all will understand, ya know? It really got me thinking this morning.
 
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Funny, I remember going to Dropkick Murphys and Flogging Molly concerts 20 years ago and feeling that way, hehe. Happy birthday!
 
Bolletje said:
Funny, I remember going to Dropkick Murphys and Flogging Molly concerts 20 years ago and feeling that way, hehe. Happy birthday!
Click to expand...
I actually got up on stage with Dropkick. That was pretty great! I was the only sober one there, though.

Thanks! I'm finally 30, so it's pretty... weird (as you can see, the mass ellipses never changed).
 
So I'm wondering how you managed to write an email 11 years ago, as your 19 year old self, and make it so that it wouldn't send for 11 years and turn up today when you are 30?

This is far more interesting to me then the content of it.
 
SimonSays said:
So... you don't remember writing it but you must have written it and then set it up to send to yourself on some kind of delayed timer to arrive today?

That I find interesting, as well as the fact that you don't remember writing it. I suppose if you did it wouldn't really be so effective. But I wonder how you knew you would forget that you had written it at the time of writing?
Click to expand...
I'm not really surprised that I don't remember. A lot has happened since then, and I'm pretty certain I was under an influence of sorts... it came from something called 'FutureMe.' I'm guessing I found it on the web browser app, StumbleUpon (talk about a blast from the past!) and decided to use it. I don't remember anything about setting it up, but I must have! Super weird.
 
iamlindsaythatisall said:
I'm not really surprised that I don't remember. A lot has happened since then, and I'm pretty certain I was under an influence of sorts... it came from something called 'FutureMe.' I'm guessing I found it on the web browser app, StumbleUpon (talk about a blast from the past!) and decided to use it. I don't remember anything about setting it up, but I must have! Super weird.
Click to expand...
I think it's quite an interesting thing to do. Obviously 11 years is a long time, and as you say you may have been under the influence of something at the time, so not remembering makes a lot of sense. It would never have occurred to me to send my future self an email but I like the idea of it.

Sometimes we think about what would we say to our past selves if we could, perhaps guide them forward based on what we now know. But to tell our future selves something of our past self ( or current self for you at the time), I wonder how many people have done that? Must be quite a few as it's something you can set up on a particular website and there must be more than one. So perhaps many people are doing it.
 
That's really fun!

Regarding emails from the past: Most email apps will let you schedule a future delivery of your email.
In gmail, for example, start an email then click the three dots on the top right. The very first menu option is "Schedule Send".
 
SimonSays said:
I think it's quite an interesting thing to do. Obviously 11 years is a long time, and as you say you may have been under the influence of something at the time, so not remembering makes a lot of sense. It would never have occurred to me to send my future self an email but I like the idea of it.

Sometimes we think about what would we say to our past selves if we could, perhaps guide them forward based on what we now know. But to tell our future selves something of our past self ( or current self for you at the time), I wonder how many people have done that? Must be quite a few as it's something you can set up on a particular website and there must be more than one. So perhaps many people are doing it.
Click to expand...
I'd love to write to my 19 year old self and have me read it. She deserves an explanation... only took 11 years to figure it out! :p
 
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