I am having trouble getting along with people at work

[joe2006]

A few months ago I quit my job at the pizza parlor because of a pay cut. I went back to the restaurant a couple of weeks ago and found out they did away with the pay cut and were paying the employees their normal wages now. I asked the boss to rehire me. She did so and gave me a raise. Most of the people who worked there before I quit had also quit so there are not many people left working there.

I have been working for a week and things are not going as well as I would like. I am having trouble getting along with two of the new people. They seem very rude and are making an effort to avoid me. I see them talking with the other employees and they get along just fine but if I try to join in on the conversation everyone leaves and goes somewhere else.

I dislike being treated differently than everyone else and wish they would be as friendly to me as they are with everyone else. They have been hollering at me when they tell me to do something for the last two days. I never heard anyone hollering at the employees before until this week.

Today when I first came in to work the boss happened to be out of the building, walking her dog with her sister. I noticed one of the rude employees giving me a dirty look as I walked by her and got so angry I said something ugly to her. This led to a nasty argument that lasted almost five minutes. I had all I wanted of the rude behavior and decided to stand up for myself.

I usually do not get so angry and have never done anything like this at work before. I get along with all the employees just fine except for these two new people.

Does anybody have any advise on how I can improve my relationship with the rude employees? Things are getting worse and worse each day.

 

[Bronzelincolns]

maybe stop worrying about those two employees not liking you and focus on those who do like you as well as just doing your job?

don't make their problems yours.

I don't think anyone likes me at my job and I couldn't care less as i'm not there to make friends but rather to do my job and go home.

 

[Fino]

Maybe you can talk to your boss about it?

Are the two people young folk? 18-22?

 

[stewdog80]

Don't worry about them. People are going to treat you differently if you aren't just like everyone else. You just have to accept that, and It is going to be very painful for a while, but the sooner you accept it, the better off you will be. You aren't any less or better than anyone else. Remember that. People are going to treat you like there is something wrong with you because they don't understand you and they never will. People are going to say cruel things about you behind your back just like they do to their own friends. Move on and be your best self at whatever you do and I have complete faith in you.

 

[Suzanne]

Learn to adapt or quit. Those are the only options available.

I quit and the reason is, because no matter the advice of: just ignore them etc, I have not been able to and I do not regret quitting in the work force.

My idea job is being left alone, but have been told that it is actually not possible, even if I am registered as disabled, as the goal is to intergrate me.

In the past, I have been too trusting and that has fallen through, so since I am able to function around others ( due to personalities), then I do not get involved.

 

[Tom]

They sound like typical bully types. Standing up for yourself was likely as good an option as any.

 

[Creep]

Remain calm through practice & continue to stand up for yourself. Perhaps if you consistently remain calm & stand up for yourself, you may be treated better eventually? Humans are unpredictable though. I wouldn’t necessarily recommend quitting your job over it, as it seems there are individuals like this everywhere one goes. Good luck.

 

[joe2006]

One of the employees appears to be in his 30s or 40s. The other girl looks to be in her 20s. I get along better with children and older people but not as well with teens and people in their early 20s. I think one of the problems is I usually do not initiate a conversation unless I hear people talking about things that are of interest to me. I guess for whatever reason these two employees do not understand very much about autistic people and find my condition a bit intimidating. The other employees are used to it and treat me nicer than some of these new people do. It just gets old when people are trying to avoid me so much. This has been going on a week.

 

[china autie]

My idea job is being left alone, but have been told that it is actually not possible, even if I am registered as disabled, as the goal is to intergrate me

Actually, I found a job where I work alone and I love it!!!

Whose goal is it to integrate us? Sigh.

I have found it difficult dealing with people who criticise my department. I have learned to excuse myself from that sort of thing.

Letting people know that whatever their problem is with me is not my problem. Though I recommend having that conversation somewhere other than on work property.

I can ignore people now too.

I have to do a good job for my boss. Everyone else-- it is nice to get along but if not, I just do my job.

Remember, people's bad behavior says lots about them and nothing about you.

 

[tlc]

Agree with most of what's been posted. I too wish everybody could just get along and I could please everybody, but unfortunately it's not so easy. So you must choose who to please. And that would be your boss. She must have been satisfied with your performance, to rehire you and give you a raise. I wouldn't jeapordize that, especially over a couple of irrational coworkers. They might even be jealous of you, maybe they didn't get a raise. Sounds like the place needs the help so she keeps them around.

I know it sounds easier said than done, but fighting back with them is what they want out of you. Don't give them that satisfaction. Just stick to what's job related and they'll probably burn out eventually.

 

[joe2006]

I went back to work today after a two day break. Both the employees I did not like were there and I tried my best to avoid them and just do my job. One of the rude employees is a server and he spent the day telling the manager about every mistake I made but I did not think to much about it. Then he told the manager that I stole a coke. The manager saw my coke that I brought from home and assumed this was the coke I stole and said I had to pay for it. I did not put up a fuss but just decided to go along with it. As I tried to pay for it, another manager who is a friend of mine offered to pay for it but I would not let him. I did not want this to become a problem for him too. I am pretty sure this server is bullying me and am trying to figure out how to avoid any more trouble. I have a pretty good relationship with the bosses so hopefully they will figure out what is going on and work something out. I hope I do not get fired.

 

[tducey]

Your best bet is to ignore them and not resort to their level. Still if it gets to be to much I'd go to your boss about it, no need for you to be bullied anywhere, much less at work.

 

[tlc]

I'd be going to the boss and asking to talk privately about what's going on. That you did not steal anything, you brought it from home, and while you're at it, address what these other people are doing. To me that one crossed the line.

 

[paloftoon]

Integrating everyone (professionally) as much as possible is appropriate for an employer. You have to find a way to work or "work" with others. At the same time, you also have a right to stand up for yourself when you have to.

 

[grimmy]

Just treat it as a job, not a social function.

Plus why do you need to get along with two rude jerks?
You need to coexist at best.

 

[joe2006]

It looks like things at work have gotten better for me. I came in to work and one of the new employees cried out my name in excitement and has been friendly to me. The two rude people are friendlier to me and are no longer being rude enough to bother me. Somehow the boss found out that I did not steal the coke and did not charge me for a coke the last time I ordered a meal at that restaurant. Now we are even. I guess the main thing I wanted was for people show the same amount of respect for me as they would for all the other employees so that my job would not be compromised. I thank everybody who provided me with the useful information with the posts above. I was having a tough time of it for a while.

 

[BehindtheScenes]

Glad that things have turned around for you. People are rather quick to change when someone at a higher level position warns them of their malicious actions.

It's one thing to ignore rude people and hope they change their ways. But, it's another when such people start spreading false lies about you-especially grown adults.