Hi, so I myself have a diagnosis of Aspergers, it is quite mild in that my social skills aren’t severely inpaired.
I was set up with another guy who wanted someone to hang out with. He has other problems and diagnosis’s in addition to his more severe Aspergers.
We hung out a few times, it was fine. Although he is very arrogant for someone who has so many ailments. For example, he will ask me a question and then correct my answer or he will try and tell me I am wrong in a field that I have experience in.
Anyway, recently I invited him out. It was a big hassle to get him to cooperate, he wanted to do one thing, and wouldn’t choose anything else. After a lot of conflict though, we did eventually decide on a venue.
He wanted me to travel there with him, I was already out so he came in himself and could barely cope with the bus.
Anyway, we got to the venue, had a fun time and that was that. Near the end of our outing, I said to him “I am going to the toilet, can you wait outside please?”, he said “yes”. I went into the toilet and came out, he was gone. I looked everywhere for him, I could not find him and rang him multiple times, he did not pick up.
Anyway, I left the venue and went home because I was in a rush and was tired of his behaviour. (On the way to the venue, he was walking slowly and kept stopping half way down the street. I’d be talking to him, turn round and he’d be an age away from me).
I got on the bus and left. When I got home I opened my phone to hordes of obnoxious texts, all about me, and my behaviour. Him telling me that I was rude to leave him, and that I don’t make enough effort with him. He also said that he was going to raise this issue with the members of a social group that we go to - to embarrass me. Very rude.
I explained that he could not be found and that I tried to look for him/phone him. He did not understand that phoning him mean’t that I was looking for him.
I dropped it. I contacted him a few days later, we texted for a few mins (he raised the compromise that he took and how he was annoyed about it), then I brought his texts up. The tone changed immediately, he blamed me for the conflict, all is my fault, he wouldn’t take any responsibility and said “you did not invite me, I chose to come”. When I attempted to give my side of the story he said “I am going to bed now, I am not going to talk about this again”, and then told me to “get lost”.
This is all from someone who I only know for a few weeks. Someone who requested a “friendship”, yet he is being rude to me after I invited him out! I am also confused about what he wants as he very rarely contacts me.
What should I do about this, given that he does not apologise and triesto insinuate that I am the one in the wrong and throws the effort that I have made with him back in my face?
I was set up with another guy who wanted someone to hang out with. He has other problems and diagnosis’s in addition to his more severe Aspergers.
We hung out a few times, it was fine. Although he is very arrogant for someone who has so many ailments. For example, he will ask me a question and then correct my answer or he will try and tell me I am wrong in a field that I have experience in.
Anyway, recently I invited him out. It was a big hassle to get him to cooperate, he wanted to do one thing, and wouldn’t choose anything else. After a lot of conflict though, we did eventually decide on a venue.
He wanted me to travel there with him, I was already out so he came in himself and could barely cope with the bus.
Anyway, we got to the venue, had a fun time and that was that. Near the end of our outing, I said to him “I am going to the toilet, can you wait outside please?”, he said “yes”. I went into the toilet and came out, he was gone. I looked everywhere for him, I could not find him and rang him multiple times, he did not pick up.
Anyway, I left the venue and went home because I was in a rush and was tired of his behaviour. (On the way to the venue, he was walking slowly and kept stopping half way down the street. I’d be talking to him, turn round and he’d be an age away from me).
I got on the bus and left. When I got home I opened my phone to hordes of obnoxious texts, all about me, and my behaviour. Him telling me that I was rude to leave him, and that I don’t make enough effort with him. He also said that he was going to raise this issue with the members of a social group that we go to - to embarrass me. Very rude.
I explained that he could not be found and that I tried to look for him/phone him. He did not understand that phoning him mean’t that I was looking for him.
I dropped it. I contacted him a few days later, we texted for a few mins (he raised the compromise that he took and how he was annoyed about it), then I brought his texts up. The tone changed immediately, he blamed me for the conflict, all is my fault, he wouldn’t take any responsibility and said “you did not invite me, I chose to come”. When I attempted to give my side of the story he said “I am going to bed now, I am not going to talk about this again”, and then told me to “get lost”.
This is all from someone who I only know for a few weeks. Someone who requested a “friendship”, yet he is being rude to me after I invited him out! I am also confused about what he wants as he very rarely contacts me.
What should I do about this, given that he does not apologise and triesto insinuate that I am the one in the wrong and throws the effort that I have made with him back in my face?
Last edited by a moderator:
