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How I see things


~Closeted Goth | A rabbit/dragon in spirit~
Something I see is a overt importance to alot of things that don't matter, yet chain down people. I'm not saying peole shouldn't believe as they will. Everyone is entitled to that.

I just see it differently.

Age, sex, gender, sexual orientation, race, etc. I see these as constructs off the realm. However they are seen. The focus on them, always provokes the ire of people. Whether it's personal veiws, or being part of the echo chamber. It's proven to be a divider. Importance in such things have nothing to gain from them but strife.

I would like to see myself blind to the things focused on. To me, it's about the character of a person. Not thier biology, biological time clock(life cycle), and if they are this or that.

The spirit inside. Thier core and heart. That's all that matters.

I have looked at all the falsehood around me. But I am hard, more so, in myself, than the world. Because I too carry falsehoods I've hid behind. Maybe it's the nature of fear. But I cannot be afraid of myself anymore.

I feel and believe there is far more to live for beyond the bodies we are bound to. Though the life after the body dies is truly a different world. I don't subscribe to religions really. But I do feel our spirits travel universes and realms. It's not as simple, black and white, and expected. At least, that's what I believe.

Maybe this earth feels like a prison, because we are trying too hard to blend into a world we are not meant to conform to and understand.

But to watch it from afar and learning what it's all about. Maybe it'll allow us to adapt in our own unique ways. We need to, for our own happiness.

Be our best selves.
Identity is a complicated topic that I believe resonates a lot more with NTs than NDs, for sure. Alexithymia doesn't help. Paul compares our earthly bodies as being "seeds" that wither to make way for the glorious plants of our eternal bodies. I like that comparison.
That is a rather wonderful way to look at it.

Though I now find myself pondering what Autism even is to me. Especially as a leave my psychological trappings.

Everyone has thier own veiw. And mine is more involving the self.

Autism is commonly viewed as a disability, disease, malody, or horrible condition. I disagree. While there are disadvantages to being ASD, there are bountiful strengths more so. Though I am seeing more and more that our weaknesses are attributed to the environment we are born into. A world built for those who do not have our unique neurodiversities.

Our spirits are disrupted by this counterintuitive environment. This 'society'. Rife with hidden rules, manners, and certain behaviors expected of all who interact. To deviate from this rigid norm, is to obtain both confusion and ire of those who do not understand.

I truly believe Autism is nothing more than us being our genuine selves. As those who discover thier neurodiversity, after spending much time hiding it though masking. Seem to also find themself. The sense of self that I have lacked all my life so far. Yet I now am finding more of myself now from starting to accept my neurodiversity. It is part of our essence. Our spirit.

Which makes me ponder something else. Is who we are a setback in humanity, or a evoloution? My personal stance is the latter, as far as I feel. Others may disagree. That is the wonders of individuality.

Though sadly, even us NDs are not without our pitfalls. Our emotional and mental stabilities are more vulnerable than that of NTs even. More reasons to have trama, despression, anxieties. More chances to meltdown, shut down, and shut out. Along with Co-Morbids for some of us.

The mind is a amazing tool. But also the scariest. Because of the great good we can do for ourselves and others, in the right mind. But equally the great evil we can do to ourselves and others, in the wrong mind.

But a poisoned mind is not without a poisoned soul.

A tortured mind is not without a bound soul.

A free mind is not without a happy, freeflowing soul.

In the end. I believe science is not enough to define people and thier 'conditions'. Only the individual knows how thier world feels. Only a individual can define for themself what they want and will adapt to, for the best life. No one else can dictate that. No one else has that power to. No matter who they are.

I think that's something that is forgotten in this age of technology and information.

The true worth of our souls, comparatively to the unnecessary structures, traditions, and materialism we stain them with.

Nothing is worth the price of our individuality. Nothing that isn't worth fighting for.

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