How Does AS Affect You with Approaching and Flirting?

[Anthony Nasti]

I've always been terrified of flirting and generally approaching women I like. This is mainly because I'm hyper-awkward combined with my own inability to gauge my own facial expressions and reaction and wind up fearing that I'm coming off as creepy. It's especially challenging in this day and age with the concept of catcalling, where it seems like you have to walk on eggshells when approaching an attractive woman in a public place (not that I disagree with the idea that women are harassed regularly, it's a real thing and quite awful). I find it all a bit intimidating.

Does anyone else have similar issues (male or female) and some steps to overcome it? A relationship is my last real hurdle that I feel I need to overcome and I'd love to get some pertinent advice on how to do so.

 

[Jonathan Lees]

yeah im a male with very similar issues, i always find it hard to build up the nerves to approach someone, when i do im very awkward, i know full well that i struggle with facial expressions and reading situations so rather than make a disastrous mistake or come of as creepy due to my awkwardness ive normally just avoided reaching out to people full stop, the relationships i have had have generally sucked all except this latest one which has been amazing.
best thing to do is work on yourself and improve yourself as a human being as much as possible and people will approach you, you need to be happy without a relationship and must not come of needy. just be relaxed with people and try to enjoy yourself rather than overthink things or self sabotage. hope this helps, you'll get there.

 

[Hopeless_Aspie_Guy]

Simple amnswer (to your thread title only) is that we/you don't. You ponder, imagine and wonder (as you watch NT's do this with relative ease) but you dare not try yourself for the fear of making a fool of yourself and or rejection as this requires advanced socialising skills many aspies don't have. Though there are probably other ways and other places you might have an improved chance.