I fear that I’ve either fallen too far behind socially to even get a coffee date or that there is a cutoff age to dating and I had it happen to me a long time ago.
This line of thinking brings to mind something that just happened a few days ago that I think could help and it is a false line of thinking. I will split them in to two different posts so as not to overwhelm anyone.
There's an App called Stoic on Android and Apple that I believe you should give a try. I've been using it for a about a year and it's been well worth the attention I give it. When I've been having a bad day, it has helped redirect my line of thinking countless times thus far. Below are a few.
First, there's a few types of thinking you seem to be stuck in which can be destructive to flourishing.
Over generalization--Viewing a single event as series of never-ending pattern of defeat
Mental Filtering--Focusing only on defeat, never on a victory--
@Thinx brings up an opportunity in taking a cooking class. It will not only help you become more self reliant, it will give you an opportunity to have a victory. Just talking to a woman can be a victory sometimes even for the most confident men with women. I was beguiled and enamored with my now wife to the point I was making a damn fool out of myself trying to get her to go on a date with me.
The reason I was able to not let the many failures discourage me, is because I broke it down to smaller components rather than viewing the whole as one event. It's not, there's many events within the whole.
It was a victory that I made her laugh for the first time, even though she turned me down.
It was a victory she talked to me after she turned me down and that I made her laugh again, she turned me down again.
It was a victory that she accepted the coffee I brought to her at the library where she worked after she had turned me down now multiple times, she turned me down again.
It was a victory that she smiled when she saw me walk through the door before I even spoke to her this time, she turned me down again.
It was a victory that before I even was able to ask again she said alright fine, since you're clearly not going to give up, I'll go out with you as a friend.
12 years later, she's my wife and has blessed me with two beautiful children. It's still a victory when I make her laugh and smile. It's a victory she's even still with me given the state of my person for a number of years that easily justified leaving me, but she didn't.
You're
jumping to the conclusion without enjoying the ride. You're mind-reading people you've not met or know and fortune telling on interactions that haven't taken place yet.
This causes problems for any person. We don't know the minds of others even if there is a pattern. We're complex creatures and are prone to shortcutting and the pattern doesn't always hold True so we must draw out the intentions and meaning of other's words and deeds through dialogue.
We don't need a Normandy Invasion event to claim a victory. Just waking up is a victory over mortality every morning.
Talking to one at this point seems like it will be a victory for you. So go do that. If not a cooking class, think of some other skill you would like to learn, go online to your local community center website and they're likely to have something related and there's likely to be women in it.