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Hi, I used to be active here and I want to come back

Discussion in 'Politics Discussion' started by Sabrina, May 4, 2021.

  1. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    Hi, I'm a 47-year-old female aspie. I want to come back here, since I used to be very active in these forums a couple of years ago.

    I am divorced, and 10 months ago, I had to give custody of my kids to their dad because I can't support them. Now they are being alienated from me. Has anyone here experienced parental alienation?
     
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  2. Finder

    Finder Active Member

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    Welcome back.

    I am very sorry about your situation.
     
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  3. Thinx

    Thinx Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Hi @Sabrina! Welcome back. I am sorry to hear what's happened, that's very difficult for you. Do you still have access to spend time with your children? They must be missing you.
     
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  4. Yeshuasdaughter

    Yeshuasdaughter Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Tell child welfare. If you haven't abused the children, then it is a crime to keep them from visits. And even if there were allegations of abuse (which I'm not saying there was), most parents still do supervised visits.
     
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  5. Skittlebisquit

    Skittlebisquit Keep trying to be as amazing as you really are

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    Welcome back!

    I hope your situation gets better, it sounds very frustrating.
     
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  6. Mia

    Mia Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Hi Sabrina, welcome back. I'm sorry to hear that happened. You pretty much raised your children by yourself. So he wouldn't help you after the divorce with financial child support I'm assuming.
     
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  7. OkRad

    OkRad μῆνιν ἄειδε θεὰ Πηληϊάδεω Ἀχιλῆος οὐλομένην V.I.P Member

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    Welcome back!! I remember you :) I am very sorry about your situation, so it is a happy hello but also a warm hug.
     
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  8. Crossbreed

    Crossbreed Neur-D Missionary ☝️

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    Welcome back. [​IMG]
     
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  9. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    In theory, yes. But parental alienation (I have not legally proved this, because it's very difficult) means that they've been brainwashed to see me as the bad parent, so they sometimes want to see me, sometimes they don't, and only for certain hours.
    In theory the judge ruled that I should see them one weekend on and one weekend off, for the whole weekend each time, but that hasn't happened yet.
     
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  10. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    I thought it was like that too, but it isn't because if "the kids don't want to see me" (they are being manipulated by their dad) there's no way to enforce it.
     
  11. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    He stopped giving alimony out of the blue and after six months of that, and me not having any other source of income, I didn't have any other option but to give him custody of the kids (here in Mexico there isn't joined custody, just full custody).
     
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  12. Skittlebisquit

    Skittlebisquit Keep trying to be as amazing as you really are

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    Oh thats just awful.
     
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  13. unperson

    unperson Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    When they're teenagers they'll be looking for an alternative parent. I'd just wait till then.
     
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  14. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    He is using the kid/alimony card . It's a tough battle. My ex is still fighting me 5+ years later. Gaslighting me anyway he can. My daughter doesn't talk to me but she doesn't call her grandmothers either. Maybe because she is on the spectrum.

    Don't blame yourself. Don't beat yourself up. Do you just one day at a time.

    The only way l see my mom or hear about my daughter is to be nice to ex. I also have to retrieve money from him that seems to disappear when l pay bills using a credit card that he also has.

    My road has been tough and long and l am still on it.

    Maybe your path will be better.
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2021
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  15. VictorR

    VictorR Random Member V.I.P Member

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    Hello and welcome back! Sorry to hear about the circumstances.
     
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  16. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    Wow, 5 years... it's a lot. We've been separated for 3 and a half years, and I feel that everything's getting worse.

    Thank you so much for your words.
    I did not get the part of your mom, though.
     
  17. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    67% of divorced or single mothers in Mexico don't get any alimony.

    In theory yes, alimony should be enforced, but in reality, the guy can just lie stating that he doesn't have a job, get paid on the side, and that's it, because if he's "not working" or "doesn't have any income" he doesn't have to pay alimony, case closed.

    I'm still fighting in court for it, but my lawyer tells me that it's very difficult to win that battle.

    That's what the ex did, and obviously he's working, not only because my kids told me so, but also because he's had money to pay for all their expenses and even move into a bigger house in a gated community with pool, etc, go with them and his girlfriend on vacation, and so on.
     
    Last edited: May 5, 2021
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  18. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    My mom only sees me when my ex comes to town and stays with her. Go figure that out.

    So sorry to hear about this. So many woman end up with nothing. I have heard of many stories like this at the Woman's Center. And the ex takes all martial assets. Really shocking.

    I had 4 attorneys total by the end of my divorce. But l limped thru. He decided to finally settled because the tax status changed in American. He was losing the window of opportunity to get a taxbreak on the alimony he paid. That no longer exists, no more tax writeoff as of by 2018.
     
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  19. Sabrina

    Sabrina Gentle & brave earthling

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    I've had 3 so far.
     
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  20. VictorR

    VictorR Random Member V.I.P Member

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    It sounds like your legal system doesn't have the concept of a "lifestyle audit"? (i.e. that a judge can look at someone's lifestyle and make an inference about their income - where I am, it's not uncommonly used in divorce and child support cases where prima facie a claim of having no income does not appear credible.)
     
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