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Hi I am here for my daughter(5)

K

Kiwiyaya

New Member
She got a diagnosis when she was 3. She started to speak around 11 months(counting and ask what is this) but she gains language very slowly. I don't know what is the problem. Now she has limited language to express herself although she is doing ok on the academy(She is good at reading(decoding) but struggling on comprehension or expression). I am so worried recently. because of her communication difficulty, she can not tell me what is going on in school. I have no idea what is her future will look like and I don't know how I can help her since she has lots of vocabulary but she just can not use them.
 
See if there is an "Autism Society" in your area. (Other Canadian members here have said there is.) Find out who they would recommend for being an autism care provider. There are a lot of autism-quacks out there who still quote Dr. Kanner (that is a bad thing).
 
Crossbreed said:
See if there is an "Autism Society" in your area. (Other Canadian members here have said there is.) Find out who they would recommend for being an autism care provider. There are a lot of autism-quacks out there who still quote Dr. Kanner (that is a bad thing).
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@Crossbreed Thank you for your suggestion. Yes, actually we have tried lots of "Treatments". ABA, SLP, OT, auditory training and I even tried GFCF for months. But we can not see much improvement. Many ppl call her "HF"(I do not like this word actually). I feel so sad for her cause she is a smart kid but she can not express herself well. We are paying thousands and thousands out of our own pocket for the therapies for her since the government has no funding to help special needs anymore. I know it would be a marathon, but I feel hopeless cause all the political things happening here, my "HF" kid will not get any therapy from the government and any support in her regular class(my daughter's principal told me she will get 0 support in the class last month)... And teachers are not allowed to share information with me cause privacy concern. I feel bad to send her to school every day.
 
ABA is not a good therapy. It attempts to solve a neurological problem with behavioral modification tactics; getting her to appear normal while refusing to affirm her as she is.

If therapy is too expensive, you can
  • attend local seminars (if your autism society has them),
  • read on-line materials (and books) from all over the world, and bring yourself up to speed.
  • If she is gifted, too (have her tested), see if you can get her into "gifted" programs. Giftedness is a similar neuro-diversity to HFA and gets some of the same considerations. It could be a "back door" to receiving services... ;)
Autism Forums is not a medical provider, but people here can tell you what they have tried and what did & didn't work, etc. So can forums that are attached to your local autism society.
 
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It is very hard for us to express emotions, other than: I don't feel good and it takes time and help to figure out the actual emotion.

When upset, we react, so watch for reaction from her. If she is happy, she will show that and naturally the opposite.
 
Suggestion. Look up "hyperlexia" and see how much of it applies to her. A couple of things you've said suggest it as a possibility.
 
Welcome to the Forums! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay in the process! :)
 
Hi Kiwiyaya

welcome to af.png
 
@Kiwiyaya "I am so worried recently. because of her communication difficulty, she can not tell me what is going on in school."


Could you go to the school (on a pre-arranged basis) and observe her in class occasionally? You would be surprised how much information you can get that way.

Because no services are being offered, you may need to be the expert and advocate on your child's needs.
 
I'm probably in the minority saying this, but I believe that schools are putting way too much pressure on children. From everything I read these days, the standards for reading and other skills now expect children of three and four to accomplish what used to be expected in the first grade. It sounds to me as if your daughter's development may be slower than expected by the school, but not abnormal for her age. Rather than constantly putting her through "therapies," use gentle guidance. Read to her, and read together. Talk to her and with her. Conversation, not "lessons."

If she has a good vocabulary and is learning, even if slowly, you have plenty of time to decide whether she will need professional help of some kind. Remember, the word is "developmental." Children don't all develop at the same rate. Some will be unusually slow, but get there all the same. The age standards for normal development have changed in the past and they may change again, taking autistic children more into account. As a last note, the stress that many therapies inflict may actually make things worse.
 
Hi, there!

My advice is to seek out professional help and to be patient. I developed language on time as a child, and was a voracious reader, yet struggled to express my feelings. I had a great understanding of language/words, but could not communicate my difficulties. This led to many meltdowns on my part, because I was frustrated that no one understood me. Eventually, slowly but surely, I have learned to express my needs and my feelings to my parents and other people. Considering that your daughter is only five right now, she has a long time ahead of her to progress.

Also, I saw that you had her in therapy. I was in therapy as well as a kid, but it didn't do much for me. I didn't really pay attention, and the only thing I cared about was getting a prize (like a sticker) after each session. I was 10-11 at the time. My parents let me progress at my own pace and supported me along the way.

Obviously, your daughter has different need than I did as a kid (I was home schooled, so my mom was my teacher) but in my opinion, worrying will get you nowhere. Just do your best to support her and help her to grow up to be her best self.
 
Do you use closed questions to find out about her day at school?

Questions that require a yes or no answer?


Will she come home from school and 'teach' her own objects? Teddies, dolls? Or repeat a behaviour she's witnessed?


Will she pick up pencils or crayons and draw something about her day at school?
Use objects to build a replica or interpretation of something she's seen or enjoyed during her school day?

Constructing sentences aren't the only forms of expression or communication.
 
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