ghostie
Active Member
Hello. When I was younger I was misdiagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and depression, anxiety, etc. I struggled for decades under this wrong diagnosis and the accordingly unsuccessful treatments I was able to get over the years. I was really in a downward spiral until about a year ago and spent a few weeks in an inpatient unit. I had an epiphany in the hospital that I am allowed to do the things I want to do and I don't need permission (ridiculous epiphany to have in my 30s I know, but sometimes I catch on slowly to certain things)
Anyways, first thing I did when I got out was get a cat which is something I had wanted to do for years but had never been able to overcome the mental hurdles I needed to to be able to take care of one. I am so thankful I did because she's been the superhero that's held me together in the last few months as I continued yet further down the spiral until I just lost my job two months ago and have been waiting for a long time for EI benefits for my lost work.
Because of the misdiagnosis, I spent so long trying to change who I was (I didn't like when the Dr. said I had BPD, it didn't feel like me, but instead of realizing that it was because it WASN'T me, I just tried to change the things about myself that made me different thinking that would make the diagnosis go away.) I was constantly at war with myself.
I was diagnosed with Asperger's two weeks ago. One of the things the psychiatrist said was that it's not about changing who I am and that is the first time anyone in the mental health care industry had said anything like that to me. It completely reshaped the way I think about myself and now instead of being a person with depression and anxiety that also had a bunch of weird, eccentric quirks that make socializing next to impossible, I'm a person with Autism and I'm learning that for the first time in my life, I'm becoming ok with who I am.
Thanks for reading.
Anyways, first thing I did when I got out was get a cat which is something I had wanted to do for years but had never been able to overcome the mental hurdles I needed to to be able to take care of one. I am so thankful I did because she's been the superhero that's held me together in the last few months as I continued yet further down the spiral until I just lost my job two months ago and have been waiting for a long time for EI benefits for my lost work.
Because of the misdiagnosis, I spent so long trying to change who I was (I didn't like when the Dr. said I had BPD, it didn't feel like me, but instead of realizing that it was because it WASN'T me, I just tried to change the things about myself that made me different thinking that would make the diagnosis go away.) I was constantly at war with myself.
I was diagnosed with Asperger's two weeks ago. One of the things the psychiatrist said was that it's not about changing who I am and that is the first time anyone in the mental health care industry had said anything like that to me. It completely reshaped the way I think about myself and now instead of being a person with depression and anxiety that also had a bunch of weird, eccentric quirks that make socializing next to impossible, I'm a person with Autism and I'm learning that for the first time in my life, I'm becoming ok with who I am.
Thanks for reading.