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Hello, I guess

Fantasia

Fantasia

Active Member
I don't actually know if I'm autistic. My social worker thinks so, but at this rate it is going to take 5 years before I get assessed. Since it is less than a month before I completely lose my temper with the process, I guess it's not going to happen.

In the meantime I am on antidepressants and I am not happy about it. I've been suffering from anxiety and depression since literally forever. I don't make friends. I sure as hell don't keep them. I've recently been going through one of those "I'm terribly lonely" patches but sanity has just about prevailed and I remembered I'm totally allergic to other humans.

I'm in my early thirties and female. A lack of companionship is a hallmark of my whole life. I am often afraid to leave the house because that means having to deal with people and the world. On top of that, I have dyscalculia and sometimes moments of confusion. Far from being slow in my development, I was always far ahead of the class, particularly in reading and vocabulary. My friends and parents are always short tempered with me and never seem to be on my wavelength. At the moment I am very grumpy about it, as they do tend to come across like a load of unreasonable idiots.

So, er, hello.
 
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Hi, Fantasia

I was in a similar situation as yourself with an official diagnostic and much to my surprise, from the moment, my husband put forward the idea to my psychiatrist to the actually official diagnostic, in less than 6 months and that is only due to the expert in autism being fully booked.

I saw him twice and on my second visit, he diagnosed me with aspergers. And I live in France, where all reports say they do not recognise aspergers and I thought: no hope then!

My husband says that I am allergic to humans and yes, I cannot deny it. I have tried all my might to fit in and now I just cannot do it anymore.

I came here as someone suspecting she was on the spectrum and I was fearful of being thrown out as a fraud, but the opposite happened! So very much welcome.
 
WARM welkome to the forums Fantasia

And like you im a complete and utter mess of human being as well (feel free to check my profile and see for youre self ) & a HOWLING lone wolf

Do try to have some patience dear & BELIVE me i understand youre frustration but loosing youre temper will NOT help things either hon

LASTLY IF you after reading my profile decide and WONT a friend thats NOT going to be scared a way that easy im only a Pm away dear
 
Hi all,

I am still waiting for a referral which seems to be a very slow and confusing process here in the UK. My GP recommended I go private but I haven't the money for that. Or at least, I don't see any point burning money on a condition nobody could ever possibly cure. I am rather wanting to throw in the towel because these meaningless three-month visits to the social worker only stress me out. Nothing happens, there's no news of a referral, and I end up having at least one panic attack. I don't want to keep this up.

I am nervous about self-identifying as an Aspie because I just don't know. Are there some online tests worth taking?
 
"Fantasia, post: 595491, member: 21880"]Hi all,

I am still waiting for a referral which seems to be a very slow and confusing process here in the UK.

" As i said i understand how frustrating this must be to you dear BUT its also JUST as vital that they check you out PROPERLY so that you get the RIGHT diagnose "

My GP recommended I go private but I haven't the money for that. Or at least, I don't see any point burning money on a condition nobody could ever possibly cure.

" I understand and i also agree "

I am rather wanting to throw in the towel because these meaningless three-month visits to the social worker only stress me out. Nothing happens, there's no news of a referral, and I end up having at least one panic attack. I don't want to keep this up.

" BELIVE me when i say things DO most probably happen dear BUT it takes time (we have a LOOOONG waiting list over here as well for diagnose within this spectrum and diagnosis "

I am nervous about self-identifying as an Aspie because I just don't know. Are there some online tests worth taking?

" What you can do is try to learn about Asbergers in females (its HIGHLY different from men dear)
Start with this one dear "

Aspienwomen: Moving towards an adult female profile of Autism/Asperger Syndrome

" Theres ALOT of Aspie tests out there hon but they are all NOT meant as diagnose tool only a hint that you MIGHT possibly have Asperger = ASD "
 
Interesting. It certainly fits me.

I love animals. I've had to quit my previous jobs because they were stressful. I am hypermobile and lack muscle tone. I'm a very creative, artistic person. I'm asexual and totally flummoxed by romance. I'm an all-round knowledge sponge, but I find it difficult to get around independently because of my deficits, which nobody ever takes seriously. I'm despairing of ever being able to fit in well enough to hold down a job or live alone. Despite this, I am good at giving presentations. People think I am strange and memorable. I think people are out to get me, since I've spend most of my life being bullied. I come across as much younger than my years.
 
Fantasia said:
Interesting. It certainly fits me.

I love animals. I've had to quit my previous jobs because they were stressful. I am hypermobile and lack muscle tone. I'm a very creative, artistic person. I'm asexual and totally flummoxed by romance. I'm an all-round knowledge sponge, but I find it difficult to get around independently because of my deficits, which nobody ever takes seriously. I'm despairing of ever being able to fit in well enough to hold down a job or live alone. Despite this, I am good at giving presentations. People think I am strange and memorable. I think people are out to get me, since I've spend most of my life being bullied. I come across as much younger than my years.
Click to expand...

Well i can tell you even if i did get my ASD diagnose when i was in youre age actually when i read this it was the same feelings as you have thats ME in SO many ways. & believe me or not i was also like you with the spikes always ready to go up 24 /7 ONES ( and NO im NOT on ANY meds for ANY of my Multiple diagnosis ) & ive been bullied and regarded as an idiot since pre kindergarten up to adult hood
 
Yes there are multiple online tests. There was a thread here listing them I thought or maybe that was on another Aspie forum. Can't remember, but at any rate you should be able to find them easily doing an online search. The tests of course are not proof positive but definately can be an indicator if you can manage to answer them accurately, which is something I find difficult as I have different versions of myself (ie. that which I am and that which I have learned to be to fit in).
 
Welcome to the Forums! I hope you make new friends and enjoy your stay in the process! :)
 
Welcome! I am in a few similar boats to you. Not sure whether I should persue diagnosis, its costs a huge amount, here.

I'm not so good with friendships, although I have a partner and children that I love.

I also, don't have a job.

I think I'm a bit allergic to humans, in general, but books are my friends, as is nature.

It does sounds like you, very well, could be Aspie. Do you know if other family member's that might be on the spectrum? That's often a good indicator for us women.

I'm good with language (english) and vocab but numbers? Not so much.

So you see; commonalities. Look for the patterns and it will give you an indication, but to me, you sound, very much like an Aspie woman.

Welcome.:)
 
Hello Fantasia and welcome.

On first blush you definitely sound Aspie/Autie to me.

If you decide to explore online tests, I would recommend you treat it sort of like, if you can forgive the odd analogy, a triangulation of signals honing in on someone's location. I describe it that way because the spectrum involves a sort of "3D" approach, or a multi-angle assessment. Not any single online test will be flawless, but they can be good indicators of certain dimensiuons. Some focus more on the social aspect; others more on the structure/systems/rigid thinking; others may focus more on the sensory aspects; and yet others may emphasize the motor and movement oddities, and that doesn't even cover it all. Its when you combine all of these factors (and over the course of an entire lifetime) when you get a better picture of someone's likelihood to be on the spectrum.

You also could look over official diagnostic criteria to get a better idea.

Anyway, you came to the right place.
 
HI Fantasia. Will it be beneficial to you to have an official diagnosis? There are a lot of self-diagnosed aspies here. Do on line tests and do some research on aspie women and adult autism and so on. If you're satisfied with your conclusions, that's all you need, unless it would benefit you in other ways.
As far as being allergic to people and other things you mentioned, I think the reason it's so hard to be okay with that (at least, for me) is because it feels like you're 'supposed' to be social and you're supposed' to this and that according to societal rules. When you learn there's a reason you have such a hard time doing those things that is the societal norm, it's easier to accept yourself because, suddenly, you know why.
Keep us posted on your search for answers, and we'll be here for you in the process.
 
My AQ score is 35.
The Rivito test gives me 139. My Mum took the test for me and scored me even higher at 149.
 
I'm glad that my Mum now takes my issues seriously. I am still impatient for a formal diagnosis, because my problems are preventing me getting work. I may need the diagnosis to seek benefits and support.
 
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