Having a hard time coping with the death of my girlfriend

[Danigt22]

I had try getting medical help, but it doesnt really help. Most of the tools they gave me only help roaming my pain. Im a christian, but my SO wasnt. The thought of her in hellfire haunts me. It is being now 4 months since her death. What broke me today into seeking help, was my relapse into masturbation and pornography. English isnt my native language, I apologize for my sloppy grammar.

 

[Alexej]

I come form the Christian approach too, but I do not adhere to the hellfire theory. I believe in a God who is more merciful than that line of theology.

Mercy and grace are significant in who I see God to be; judgement less so.


Sorry for your loss and welcome to the Forums

 

[Major Tom]

After reading that I'm glad I'm not religious, there surely is something about thinking someone you loved is roasting in eternal damnation because they didn't believe what you believe... I find it pretty sick TBH.

 

[Wolfnox]

I had try getting medical help, but it doesnt really help. Most of the tools they gave me only help roaming my pain. Im a christian, but my SO wasnt. The thought of her in hellfire haunts me. It is being now 4 months since her death. What broke me today into seeking help, was my relapse into masturbation and pornography. English isnt my native language, I apologize for my sloppy grammar.

Have something that might help. If you read in the Bible about Sodom and Gomorrah. You know God would have spared the city if their were but ten good men in it. Heres something to think about. Outside of Abraham and his family. There was no one else who knew about God. So i believe he saves good people even if they dont know him.

 

[Danigt22]

Have something that might help. If you read in the Bible about Sodom and Gomorrah. You know God would have spared the city if their were but ten good men in it. Heres something to think about. Outside of Abraham and his family. There was no one else who knew about God. So i believe he saves good people even if they dont know him.

John 14:6 6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

John 3:5 5 Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.

Isaiah 64:6 But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

My only hope for her, is the last minutes of grace God gives. Nevertheless, she once told she had a dream of God telling her he loved her.

 

[Danigt22]

After reading that I'm glad I'm not religious, there surely is something about thinking someone you loved is roasting in eternal damnation because they didn't believe what you believe... I find it pretty sick TBH.

The reality is much worse, we all are sinners. One lie, one lustfull thought, one little sin is enough to recieve eternal punishment. Nevertheless, Jesus is the lamb that lawfully let us escape punishment. I cant escape my faith knowing it as real. Take it with a grain of salt, since you can interpret as delusional. But while waking up, I saw a dog/goat person 5 meter tall, skinny, with white garments. His presence was really hard to describe but it was much much worse than any thing I had felt before. I told him, he didnt have any legal rights to be here and ask Jesus for protection. That thing fleed in seconds. Its either im having maniac attacks or it is real.

 

[Wolfnox]

John 14:6 6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

John 3:5 5 Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.

Isaiah 64:6 But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

My only hope for her, is the last minutes of grace God gives. Nevertheless, she once told she had a dream of God telling her he loved her.

Sounds like she had a relationship with God. Unless you think she made up that dream about God.

 

[Danigt22]

Sounds like she had a relationship with God. Unless you think she made up that dream about God.

Its very unlikely she lied, she felt a peace and serenity in that dream. I had dreams with the lord speaking to me aswell, it is hard to explain but I believe you can feel his holy spirit and it is a confusing experience since you want stay with him and never leave. I thought she would repent and follow Jesus after that but she was reluctant, and was in pain accepting a father after his biological one abandoned her.

 

[Alexej]

... Nevertheless, she once told she had a dream of God telling her he loved her.

Now there is something to hold on to
You can still pray for her

 

[Wolfnox]

Its very unlikely she lied, she felt a peace and serenity in that dream. I had dreams with the lord speaking to me aswell, it is hard to explain but I believe you can feel his holy spirit and it is a confusing experience since you want stay with him and never leave. I thought she would repent and follow Jesus after that but she was reluctant, and was in pain accepting a father after his biological one abandoned her.

I do understand. He has spoken to me. Sometimes in dreams. But mostly by miracles he preforms. If she had that. There is a strong chance she believed on some level. Maybe you should pray to God about her. Tell him your fears and have faith he will help.

 

[Danigt22]

I do understand. He has spoken to me. Sometimes in dreams. But mostly by miracles he preforms. If she had that. There is a strong chance she believed on some level. Maybe you should pray to God about her. Tell him your fears and have faith he will help.

I heard from cs. lewis God knows all future events, and praying for the dead isnt futile. I will stay in hope, and pray for her. The only I wish more beside meeting Jesus in heaven is hugging her one more time.

 

[Wolfnox]

I heard from cs. lewis God knows all future events, and praying for the dead isnt futile. I will stay in hope, and pray for her. The only I wish more beside meeting Jesus in heaven is hugging her one more time.

With God all things are possible.

 

[oregano]

After reading that I'm glad I'm not religious, there surely is something about thinking someone you loved is roasting in eternal damnation because they didn't believe what you believe... I find it pretty sick TBH.

Actually, the sick ones are the preachers who loudly proclaim that anyone-including other Christians-who do not believe exactly as they do are doomed to eternal hellfire. Some Christian traditions believe in a place called purgatory where those who had good hearts in earth life but who never proclaimed themselves Christians during their earth life are able to "work their way" into heaven so to speak.

Just from what OP has written it sounds like his gf wanted to believe and was a good woman but had been severely abused (abandoned) by her father and thus felt that it was impossible for God to love her. This is very common among those who have been severely abused by family members as children.

Catholicism's chief exorcist has said that around 80% of those possessed by demons have been sexually abused by family or close friends of family. One theory says that severe abuse causes a child to reject everything and turn towards Satan, another theory says that abuse creates a "soul wound" that is a portal for demons. This doesn't sound like her though. It sounds like she felt that she was unlovable, even by God.

 

[Danigt22]

Actually, the sick ones are the preachers who loudly proclaim that anyone-including other Christians-who do not believe exactly as they do are doomed to eternal hellfire. Some Christian traditions believe in a place called purgatory where those who had good hearts in earth life but who never proclaimed themselves Christians during their earth life are able to "work their way" into heaven so to speak.

Just from what OP has written it sounds like his gf wanted to believe and was a good woman but had been severely abused (abandoned) by her father and thus felt that it was impossible for God to love her. This is very common among those who have been severely abused by family members as children.

Catholicism's chief exorcist has said that around 80% of those possessed by demons have been sexually abused by family or close friends of family. One theory says that severe abuse causes a child to reject everything and turn towards Satan, another theory says that abuse creates a "soul wound" that is a portal for demons. This doesn't sound like her though. It sounds like she felt that she was unlovable, even by God.

I like the point of view of the catholic faith, your words are very kindly.

 

[Buzzerfly]

If you adhere to the worlds Christian rule sets, you wouldn’t watch a ton of porn. Since you do, you can just leave it up to God how you or your girlfriend will be judged. If you saw good in her, I’m sure god does too.

not meant to insult,
And I’m not sure this isn’t one of those bait ppl into getting upset posts. But if you’re for real, the first thing I said applies!

 

[Danigt22]

If you adhere to the worlds Christian rule sets, you wouldn’t watch a ton of porn. Since you do, you can just leave it up to God how you or your girlfriend will be judged. If you saw good in her, I’m sure god does too.

not meant to insult,
And I’m not sure this isn’t one of those bait ppl into getting upset posts. But if you’re for real, the first thing I said applies!

We christians arent perfect, I just slid for a day after half a year of escaping my sins.

 

[Joel's Hear]

The pharisees tipped their tithe of mint and fine herbs but when it came down to mercy and decency they lacked thereof. So boldly proclaiming their faith, the words of their mouths spewing so many benefactions to God, yet they wouldn't know a child of the Lord if they so saw them.

 

[Buzzerfly]

Well then, if you see with yourself that you can sin and God doesn’t necessarily damn you for all eternity, wouldn’t it be the same for her!

I mean, how bad do you think she was?

ipersonally believe that Hell is on Earth and all who die are with the Lord as a spirit. If you’re evil on Earth, your spirit has already left you and the thing that roams the earth is in hell and is not good to others.

 

[Danigt22]

Well then, if you see with yourself that you can sin and God doesn’t necessarily damn you for all eternity, wouldn’t it be the same for her!

I mean, how bad do you think she was?

ipersonally believe that Hell is on Earth and all who die are with the Lord as a spirit. If you’re evil on Earth, your spirit has already left you and the thing that roams the earth is in hell and is not good to others.

Christ died for us in the cross, without faith. He cant atone us for ours sins. I love her and wish Christ has mercy since no one earn heaven by their own, nevertheless if you dont believe I dont what to say. I hope God gives all us grace before our deaths.

 

[Danigt22]

The pharisees tipped their tithe of mint and fine herbs but when it came down to mercy and decency they lacked thereof. So boldly proclaiming their faith, the words of their mouths spewing so many benefactions to God, yet they wouldn't know a child of the Lord if they so saw them.

Only God is good,

Well then, if you see with yourself that you can sin and God doesn’t necessarily damn you for all eternity, wouldn’t it be the same for her!

I mean, how bad do you think she was?

ipersonally believe that Hell is on Earth and all who die are with the Lord as a spirit. If you’re evil on Earth, your spirit has already left you and the thing that roams the earth is in hell and is not good to others.

Cabeza de agua acabó con amistad de toda una vida
If you need proof here it is