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Have you ever been discouraged or critisized for your hobby or interest?

Discussion in 'Obsessions and Interests' started by Adora, Apr 29, 2015.

  1. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    I'm just wondering because in the past my dad use to criticise my drawings I use to do and sometimes said that some of my hobbies were useless,have any of you have had a similar situation where someone or something discouraged a interest of yours?
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2015
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  2. kestrel

    kestrel Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Yes. It's interesting you mentioned that your dad criticised your drawings. As a teen and into my twenties parents told me, "your artwork is cute but get a real, valid, useful occupation." At the same time, my art instructors all encouraged me to pursue my art and gave me high marks. Confusing for me back then.
     
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  3. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    My dad didn't like my cute pictures ever at times I remember I drew a picture and was happy with it up until I coloured her skin too dark that it ruined the whole picture I was very upset over it and my dad saw me upset and said was it going to make money? I said no then he said something along the lines of it being useless.
     
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  4. kestrel

    kestrel Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Oh, yes the money comments. Sounds just like my dad used to talk. I hope you can filter out that kind of negativity better than I did when I was young. It's extremely difficult when one's own parents give those kind of messages.
     
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  5. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    Yeah even though he has passed on now but it still is at the back of my head he and other people in my life have either been critical about it or the other way like saying for example I'm wasting my talent
     
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  6. kestrel

    kestrel Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    My parents are deceased, but yes the words and attitudes were left here in my head. When they pop up as troublesome - and that's only natural - I (metaphorically) send them back from whence they came.
     
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  7. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    Words are powerful things they can do so much damage I'm trying to convince myself to draw and not let outside influences bother me
     
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  8. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Parents need remedial training sometimes. Or sent to the corner. ;)

    I like to tell this story. When around 12-13 my Mom said I shouldn't spend all my money (paper route, etc) on Toy Soldiers all the time. I was buying the nice full color ones from England that cost anywhere from .15 to $1.00 a piece which was a lot at the time. By comparison you could get a bag of 100 green army men for $1.00. She suggested buying things like a football once in a while. And I saw where she was going with it. In other words be more like a normal kid. :rolleyes: But I was good at sports already and wanted my private time and money to be in my special interest areas... not what someone else said I should be doing.

    I explained to her that practically every guy in the neighborhood had one & we were never lacking (though those little pins you inflated them with was another story). But these guys I collected were full color real quality figures from England and would one day be very collectible and valuable. And to her credit, she never belabored points once she made them.

    Years later, many years, and I have done alright, have a career and a family. But I still collect Toy Soldiers on the side. :D And have all those ones from my childhood. But now to finance it, I am becoming a dealer as well as collector. And it was successful from day one because I had all these years of knowledge on the subject. And I could show my Mom the same figures we had been talking about years ago and tell her that the .50 guy was now worth $175.00. She liked it now! But really I think it was giving her her first grandchildren that granted me blanket absolution.;)
     
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  9. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    That's good you are able to combine what you love with being a dealer aswell I probably be good at identifying old toys especially from the the 80s and know a fair bit about girls toys too
     
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  10. Harrison

    Harrison The Mad Taoist

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    When I was very young I had an idea, that idea became the core of my special interests. When I was a bit older, and doing the job my folks wanted me to do, I packed it all in and made my special interest my life. My friends, at that time, and my family, disowned me. They all told me I was foolish, that it would never work out, that I was throwing my life away.

    So.Wrong.

    My special interest became hugely succesful, made me rich and gave me the chance to travel the world. I loved every minute but my folks, however, never spoke to me again, ever.

    And me?

    I cared not a jot!

    Never give up your dreams for someone else, or because they told you too.
     
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  11. umbrellabeach

    umbrellabeach Well-Known Member

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    Yes, my mom used to get really annoyed at my Disney obsession in its early stages. When we went to the library I wanted to check out Disney-related material to learn more about it and its many worlds, and my mom told me to check out other things besides it to "get a broad mix" or whatever - even though Disney IS broad because of all its worlds and references to history and literature. I didn't realize this until later, but I ended up reading a lot of different things, including classics, because they were often inspirations for Disney films. This is funny because my mom was the one who eventually diagnosed me with AS later on.
    Later on, when I'd become obsessed with Mickey and friends, a close friend got annoyed with that too, and I remember instances where she asked me to "stop talking about him all the time," and even one instance where her sister told me they'd been shopping for a birthday or Christmas gift for me, and they'd found something Mickey-related but my friend said not to feed my obsession by getting it. (Good thing I'm capable of feeding it myself, lol.) I didn't tell her until our last years in that place that I was an Aspie and I don't think she understood very well. However, we follow each other on Pinterest now and I have a board dedicated to autism and AS, and since she follows me, she follows it too. I hope I've been able to educate her on AS pretty well. It's especially important for her to know about it because she wants to be a teacher.
     
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  12. The Penguin

    The Penguin Chilly Willy The Penguin

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    Some people find it odd I like Lego at my age. However, I never care what people say.
     
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  13. Nitro

    Nitro Admin/Immoral Turpitude Staff Member Admin V.I.P Member

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    I was abused by many over my special interests. My parents nurtured mine and supported me fully.
    Most of my special interests were either dangerous or very entertaining to say the least :p
    I had a very successful career path and made a huge mark on our world using some of my special interests,that still fund themselves today.
     
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  14. King_Oni

    King_Oni Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I suppose in my teens my parents had the typical response to any teen who was in a band, lol. "Spend more time on school, this band won't get you anywhere anyway". And while said band didn't get me anywhere, neither did school, lol. And in that case I'm more likely to pick whichever is most fun.

    Aside from that; I never really got a lot of comments from any other hobbies I have/had. Granted, my parents don't actively encourage and support any hobbies/interests I have, but I don't think it should be their role anyway. As long as I'm enjoying myself I should be somewhat good to go.
     
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  15. AsheSkyler

    AsheSkyler Feathered Jester

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    My grandmother is the worst for finding something to criticize my art about, and she's always way off when she does. Not quite as off as the one moron who said my horse looked funny when I had drawn a COW (horns, split hoof, tufted tail, and all), but she's almost that bad. I just don't show her anything if I can get away with it because she's so negative and miserable about my art.
     
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  16. Ylva

    Ylva Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Parents: "Don't read so much!" (I was a stupid and naive child and obeyed.)
    Teachers: "You daydream too much!" ("Go engage with those kids who'll literally torture you while we watch instead!")
    Father: "Learn to take constructive criticism!" (Of the "you're a horrible person and will never amount to anything" kind.)
     
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  17. Myron

    Myron Active Member

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    A couple of years ago, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic was one of my special interests. I got bullied so much about it (including one person who believed all Bronies "deserved to die"), that I forced myself to drop my interest and move on to something else. I kind of miss my MLP interest sometimes, but I don't think it's worth being ridiculed over. (Oh, and by the way, the people who bullied me were not NTs, but members of a different Asperger's forum. Why they felt the need to put down a fellow autist is beyond me.)
     
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  18. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    That's horrible:( it's sad people made you dislike mlp that you felt you had to drop it I've always collected mlp stuff from the original 80s stuff to the FIM stuff but I'm sorry that you got ridiculed over it.
     
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  19. Rocco

    Rocco Wandering Trainwreck V.I.P Member

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    This is very true.
    I am, very often, discouraged and criticized for my paintings. Told to stop all together. However, most of the time I just keep at it. It feels good for ME. And if it can make ANY other person smile or feel happy, it's worth it.
    Do Your thing girl! Don't let others get you down.

    ^^^that^^^
     
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  20. Adora

    Adora Well-Known Member

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    Thanks yeah gotta convince myself to draw for myself I let too many influences stop me.
     
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