Have any of used this website for a while but made no friends here?

[Amethystgirl]

I don't know anyone on this website even though I very rarely message people.

 

[Matthias]

You're not alone. I don't think anyone here likes me.

 

[Amethystgirl]

I'm sorry you are having difficulty Matthias. I don't even know what to say to people.

 

[NB79]

I don't seem to ever make friends, maybe there is some 'condition' i have, apart from autism.
or maybe is just the autism.
I haven't able to figure it out.

 

[Crossbreed]

I feel like I am on friendly terms with most of the regulars here. I know that I have (unintentionally) rubbed some folks the wrong way, but you cannot please everyone...

 

[Tired]

even though I very rarely message people.

I mean... isn't it the answer on why you aren't on a friendly terms with people here? Because you don't talk to them much?

 

[AuAL]

Umm, this is not a dating app? We’re all autistic here. Follow along, join in on conversations, comment, listen. People will get to know you. Slowly. That’s how most of us do that stuff. @Amethystgirl, I’ve read your posts. I am sad about your difficulties building friendships, which you’ve mentioned. I wish I could help you, but I don’t know enough to intrude (and I suspect we’re in very different situations - I’m in my sixties.) But you are seen. Some of us are listening.

 

[Masked Man]

Do people make "friends" on a forum? I thought it was just for discussion.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

This concept of a friend, per se, doesn't fit within my paradigm when it comes to online relationships. Sure... I get along great with most people... good acquaintances... but I am here for the discussions. At least in my mind, a friend is someone that we share a life with... or at least an important part of... physically interacting with... eating meals, sharing experiences, looking into each others eyes, thinking of each other when we are apart, etc.

 

[Roisin]

It's a strange point in time, I came up through the early internet experience, where friends were an in-person thing, as were relationships.
Yet I have felt a connectedness to online friends, beyond discussion and commonalities. Online, as with regular life I've only found friendship success with people who are low maintenance socially.

Also being part of an autistic community gives me space to just be me, a break from social expectations. Where I see people giving more of their energy is when someone is in need beyond the everyday common difficulties.
I guess for me thats where I see the value of being among peers, the connectedness over shared struggles, if there was ever a genuine meeting of minds it would be in those situations. Yes its limited in what it can offer from a friendship perspective, but I'd take the authentic connection in those difficult times over anything forced or unsustainable over the short to medium term.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Even friends I have physical contact with I only occasionally visit,

 

[Aspychata]

I don't really view forums as a way to make friends, as l don't know enough about them. l made my last couple of friends by reaching out and seeing if we were both interested in being friends. You may try going to a special interest group and meet someone who may be like you in your interests. Just because you didn't meet friends here doesn't mean that you aren't friend worthy. Alot of people are busy 24/7, and a friend involves a time commitment for many of us, that we don't have.

 

[Amethystgirl]

I don't know what to say to people and I've try autistic groups in the past both online and in person and I don't fit in. I think I'm lower functioning than a lot of autistic people.