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Has anyone used Hiki?

Discussion in 'Love, Relationships and Dating' started by Fact Ten, Jan 28, 2020.

  1. Fact Ten

    Fact Ten Member

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    I'll resist the urge to make puns about the name at the moment...

    A friend of mine who I game with recently let me know about an app exclusively for individuals on the autism spectrum called Hiki. It's apparently both for dating and making new friends and I was considering using it. Does anyone here have any experiences, positive or negative, that you could share?

    I have not downloaded the app yet. My initial thoughts are that this could be more helpful than something like Tinder or other general dating apps that aren't particularly for specific population segments like those of us on the spectrum. However, another initial thought I had is that, seeing as it is a fairly new dating app, it might be of limited value to me since it might mean too few people use it at the moment. I recognize that this isn't really a valid reason to not give it a shot but it also moderates my optimism a bit.

    If anyone has any feedback or opinions to contribute, I would greatly appreciate it. Also, if you have any other dating apps to suggest that might also be helpful for people on the spectrum, I'd be happy to hear those suggestions. Any information is welcome!

    (Relevant PS: I've been flirting with the idea of trying dating apps since my therapist recommended it as a potential way to meet people after I described a fairly recent event that I handled well given the circumstances.)
     
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  2. Rexi

    Rexi uwu owo uwu SlightlyFilterless Atheist Science=<3 V.I.P Member

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    It was a dark and cloudy night when I met my first Hiki date... - no, I think there's no guarantees there won't be negative experiences on any app. Thing is every experience teaches you something new and boosts your esteem by being able to interact through such situations, it's important to not expect much and keep trying. Also be aware and safe, there might be tricksters who may want to fool you through such an app since youre autistic and think youre gullible and can get your money.

    I personally never heard of it, not too familiar with apps or dating sites for autism. Might not be very popular, but I think you should give it a few tries.
     
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  3. Crossbreed

    Crossbreed Neur-D Missionary ☝

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    Now that you mention it, it IS funny that the name of a quasi-dating app sounds like "hickey..."

    And I have to ask,
    "How can anyone tell whether they are talking to a 'bot or not...?" [​IMG]

    Him: So, what do you do?
    Her: I lurk on social media platforms and compile data on prominent user traffic.
    Him: What a coincidence! :hearteyes: Me, too...!
     
    Last edited: Jan 28, 2020
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  4. Jeremiah

    Jeremiah Chaotic Neutral

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    Wanna know what's more fun (or less, depending...)? Hiki is a finnish word for sweat.
     
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  5. Rasputin

    Rasputin ASD / Aspie V.I.P Member

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    I would give it a try.
     
  6. Major Tom

    Major Tom Searching for ground control... V.I.P Member

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    I'm married, so I haven't used any dating apps. I'd say give it a shot, but be careful not to get swindled.
     
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  7. GadAbout

    GadAbout Well-Known Member

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    Autistic people are known to be a little naive, so that might be exactly where a sociopath would go, either to swindle you out of money, or to abuse you emotionally or physically. That's one reason to reconsider this app.

    The second one that comes to me is that just by being there, you are "outing" yourself as a person with autism. I'm assuming since it is dating app, most people post a picture of themselves. Even if you have an anonymous screen name, if any one sees your picture there, they will be able to identify you as autistic.

    I'm not saying we need to keep our diagnosis hidden, but neither is it a good idea to publish the fact.

    So if you want to try it, I recommend (1) a novel screen name that can't be linked to you or your identity on any other site, and (2) no picture, while you lurk and see if this is really where you want to participate. Lurk and hang out a while and see what goes on there. You can always add a picture later if you really want to.
     
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  8. Fact Ten

    Fact Ten Member

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    I understand what you're saying. My biggest issue with most acquaintances and some friends has been that, even when they know I'm on the spectrum, they don't understand the spectrum and how that can impact how I interact with others. I'll even confess that after trying to willfully ignore my own Asperger's/autism and "pass" as "normal" from the age of 12 til about my early 20s, I don't really understand autism as well I should. Even now, as I begin my late 20s, I measure myself against a neurotypical measuring stick even though I know it's unfair.

    I've found that just saying I'm on the spectrum near the beginning of an acquaintanceship or friendship and making sure to say it's a lens and not a crutch for my actions and words, people are either more understanding and patient... or they aren't. If the latter, I don't have to waste time and I can be cordial and keep it to greetings and any small talk that I feel I can add something to.

    I guess what I'm trying to get at is that I've had more success with people than failure by disclosing my diagnosis early. When there is failure, I don't have to engage with those people so it saves me time. You make a valuable point that outing yourself to anonymous strangers can be dangerous, but I've experienced the positive side of the double-edged sword too. Granted, people in real life aren't going to be selling my data off.
     
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  9. Fact Ten

    Fact Ten Member

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    Update: made a Hiki. Seeing as it's so new and aimed at a niche target demographic, it was understandable that there didn't seem to be that many matches within 150 miles of me.
     
  10. ryan1205

    ryan1205 Mr. I Don't Know V.I.P Member

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    There is an friendship/dating app dedicated for people on the spectrum called Hiki I just started using it today. There is not many people using it. So far on it it seems unique and great for people like us. There are many flaws with the app and I don't know how old it is. However, if anybody on the spectrum feels lonely and feels they will be that way for a long time, I suggest trying this app.

    So, have any of you heard of this app? Is it useful? If you had used it before, what was your experience with it?
     
  11. Fact Ten

    Fact Ten Member

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    Though I filled out a profile on it, I'm sort of hanging back and only log into it once every few weeks. I find it to be a clunky design and I'm not entirely sure I'll be using it.
     
  12. TopherPwn

    TopherPwn Active Member

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    Hi cool you skipped out on the puns. I got it and the distance increases fast. I'm in a big city and it was very very minimal on people. I probably won't keep it to long to be honest. Hope your day is well!
     
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  13. Fact Ten

    Fact Ten Member

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    I don't think it will be something I abandon. I'll keep it relatively updated but I won't really put much effort into it. I had the same issue with the increasing distance too. Thanks for replying and I hope your day is the same!
     
  14. TopherPwn

    TopherPwn Active Member

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    Only reason I'm removing it is due to phone storage. If I had more space I would consider your way too. I could micromanaging or add it when I get a new phone. Right now it's really a matter of storage compared to activity. I hope it works out for you, good luck!
     
  15. paloftoon

    paloftoon Well-Known Member

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    Hiki was advertised on my local news channel today. I hadn't noticed and looked up if there was a thread on this and didn't know about it until today. I'd consider it reputable to use at this point.