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God has sent us a miracle, but....

Discussion in 'Help and Support' started by UberScout, Apr 13, 2019.

  1. UberScout

    UberScout How can I be so intelligent yet so ignorant?

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    My sister has been returned to us and there is a possibility of a house for us, but we are still facing difficulties that may hold is back from even getting to our new house, if and when we get to it. Money once again evades us, friends are few and far between and once again, there isn't a single person willing to actually help us. And even if someone DOES step up to help us, either they don't do enough, they don't have any luck or what they do for us isn't helpful at all. I'm not exactly expecting someone to cough up their whole wallet for us or do wait on us hand and foot, but we are in a real, serious situation that will have a dire effect on us if nothing pulls through. I don't want to see us sleep in the car or in the woods again. Those were faithless times and if we end up in that position again my psyche may get damaged beyond repair or recovery, and I may find myself sitting on the rail of a bridge with my legs hanging over the wall. And I wouldn't allow a CIT officer to pull me back this time... I would just spread eagle over the side without thinking twice.

    This amount of uncertainty is driving me Chesshire Cat Mad and I don't know whether to light candles and rub a bowl of water to see what comes next.

    All of us are scared, angry, anxious, snapping at each other, and I just came out of a deathly serious panicking spell where I was panicking so badly I couldn't even move; I just sat there on the bed with my mouth open, throat closing, vision blurry and warping around and changing colors, and when I finally snapped out of it I found myself writing random numbers on a sheet of grid paper and trying to copy then on my phone with random symbols.

    I haven't had a panic attack that bad since Maddog and I went to get my check recovered, where in the cubicle office I was sitting in, he just told the woman everything that he and my mother were dealing with at once in front of me. I woke up in the car with a BP cuff on my arm. The whole purpose of that was to prove to get I really was Autistic, because she didn't believe him. He's pretty clever with things like that.

    TL;DR: SOMEBODY HELP ME WE'RE GOING UNDER AND IM LOSING MY MIND WITH ANXIETY
     
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  2. Misery

    Misery Photo-Negative

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    Well, here's the biggest question: What kind of help *exactly* are you seeking?

    There's lots of people on this forum willing to help in some way, but unless you specify what you want, nobody can offer much of anything. I mean, describing the bad situation is one thing, but when asking for help, you need to describe what you think might help as well.

    But you're also going to have to control that anxiety at least a bit rather than letting it control you. You cannot make rational decisions in that state, and may end up taking actions that only worsen the situation (and chances are, you wont realize that you've done exactly that until MUCH later). Speaking from LOTS of experience here.

    Sit still, breathe slowly, think *carefully*, and tell us what we might be able to do to help.
     
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  3. UberScout

    UberScout How can I be so intelligent yet so ignorant?

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    We're covered on food (the kitchen cabinet is nothing but rice and canned food) and we have gas, but what we need is money.

    Don't know how I could get donations but if I had the option, it would help a lot.

    Also, Maddog made it *officially* official that we got that house. It's just a matter of when we can move in. But we'll still need money to survive and pay bills and such.
    If people here are willing to help, and that donate money to us or something, how would I even go about setting that up? We don't even have a PO box...
     
  4. nowwhat

    nowwhat Well-Known Member

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    So basically...youre asking for money on the internet? Cant you start a gofundme thing? Arent there already existing avenues for this sort of fundraising other than appealing to a very small group of unemployed/underemployed folks?
     
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  5. tlc

    tlc The Mackinac Bridge and U.P. is my happy place.

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    I've never done it so I don't know how it works, but my daughter's mom started a gofundme when her husband got cancer and got over $13,000. A coworker started one when his house burned down and got next to nothing.

    Is there a local organization that could lend a hand? Like Salvation Army or something like that? Or maybe people at the food banks would know of programs?
     
  6. Mary Terry

    Mary Terry Well-Known Member

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    If you are in the USA, then you may qualify for SSI disability benefits based on ASD. You can work some hours to supplement your income without losing your SSI benefits. There is also government-assisting housing such as HUD for which you may qualify.

    Churches may help but you usually need to have some kind of relationship with the church such as membership because they are inundated by people seeking money.

    Internet solicitations for funding from strangers might generate some contributions but it is not a long term solution to debt or money management problems.

    You can do this but you've got to think it through rationally and implement a plan that will provide stability and predictability for your cash flow. Just having a plan in place will help reduce the stress and anxiety.

    You're not going to starve. There are food banks and charities who will provide food so you don't need to worry about that for now.

    Good luck and stay strong. You can do this!
     
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  7. RosaViolet

    RosaViolet Well-Known Member

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    I think you need to feel that that there is going to be some floor. That you won't fall through.

    Maybe you could channel your remaining energy into exploring various possibilities to get some SSI and other sources of help in your area. Just make a plan of whom you could talk to, where to go and what to do in case of hardship. Having fall back options usually helps me to calm down.

    You also need some emotional support. Are there some real life people you could talk to, or even some phone lines or online. Whatever would help you feel that you not alone, that people are there for you..

    Do you have any family?
     
  8. UberScout

    UberScout How can I be so intelligent yet so ignorant?

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    I already have SSI. But it doesn't come often enough to keepnus afloat and we keep having to pay the rates as they increase.

    My only family that is willing to even talk to us is my mother, stepfather and two sisters.

    Food banks do help us, and believe it or not they come through on their promises. But we still have other things to pay for.

    We're actually about to load up now once they tell us to.
     
  9. Mary Terry

    Mary Terry Well-Known Member

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    I don't know the status of your sister but if she is eligible for SSI, then she needs to apply, too.

    Have you made a budget for your living expenses so you know how much extra money you need each week or month to live on? Once you know how much extra money you need, you can develop a plan to get that money. Your sister and/or you may need to get a part time job to supplement your SSI income.

    Meanwhile, do you own anything you can sell? Can your family commit to giving you some money on a short term basis to help?

    The weather is warming up where I live and it is time to start mowing yards, weeding, and gardening. Can you do that kind of work to make some money? If you're in a cold climate, can you ask neighbors if they would pay you to shovel snow? Can you find some retired or disabled people who need help with chores that they have trouble doing? Baby sit? Can you or your sister do housecleaning? Wash cars for neighbors? Wash house windows which everyone hates to do? I'm trying to think of jobs that you can do in exchange for preferably cash payments. Pizza delivery for a small salary and tips from customers? There's gotta be something you and/or sister can do to make extra money. Do you have any skills or training that can be used to generate more money?

    I wish I could help you more than just making suggestions.