@Callistemon, I was getting pretty negative by age 25 by an unremitting loneliness that I felt powerless to change, though I behaved ethically and courteously towards people I worked with or encountered. I recognized that I did not understand people. Finally making enough to have a little disposable income, I started pursuing my special interests in the outdoors and natural history.@Gerald Wilgus, what was your attitude like before you married? I can't see you walking through the world cursing other people for having happy things, instead of being glad for them - or at the very least neutral, when you were younger and sad about things you didn't have (and we all know you didn't feel entitled to that stuff). Am I way off the mark with that guess?
Then, reading a lot, I worked on enjoying who I was and understanding social communication. My attitude improved and I enjoyed chances to meet women, even engaging with couples, hinting that I was looking to connect and get into a relationship. Every date I went on after, taught me a little more, and I was acting hopeful and positive. I happily shared my knowledge with others and enjoyed day trips with them, taking part in activities.
Most dates and one longer term relationship went nowhere, but they gave me hope that I was moving in the right direction. Feeling good about myself and even though not thinking I was a conventional male, I was enjoying myself and rather than paying attention to pro sports, I was out hiking, bicycling, skiing, or fossil collecting.
It was at this time when I met my spouse, first spending time on the phone helping her get ready for a trail maintenance trip then making plans to drive together to the trip. Having a good attitude and being open to things made a huge difference in moving from enjoying the time together to enjoying a life together.