This is something I occasionally think about, then convince myself it doesn't bother me. Most days it doesn't or I'm too busy to think about it. It's incredibly rare that I can keep a stable friendship with another woman. I think my sister and female cousin are the only ones I can deal with and vice versa on a regular basis - my sister because we are polar opposites but grew up together and find each other entertainingly weird, my cousin because she's a fellow aspie.
I was treated like crap by most of the girls in junior school, plus two female teachers who were pretty sadistic and took a dislike to me (to be fair, they hated a lot of kids and really shouldn't have been teaching). So I learned to fear and distrust women at a very young age. Then my grandmother had schitzophrenia while I was growing up and would have severe mood changes that I took personally as I didn't understand mental illness as a child. And my mother, albeit a lovely woman, was never someone I could rely on when sh*t hit the fan as she just isn't that type of person. So by the time I reached highschool I was already actively avoiding other girls/women. In my mind they were either dangerous or exhaustingly needy.
In addition to that, I have a very 'male brain'. I have no desire to change sex or anything, but I'm very much a tomboy type and find men far easier to understand. I love very stereotypical male activities such as investing/economics, technology, politics, programming, cars, gaming, extreme sports and I'm not a very emotionally expressive person. I don't have time to get manicures, hairstyles, shop for pretty clothes or watch TV and I can't stand gossip or irrational behaviour. I enjoy working and completing projects/goals. So that cuts out 90% of conversation topics. I'm very direct and to the point, logical and have a very strong work ethic. Women say I'm cold, robotic, rude, overly aggressive, not complimentative enough (I've noticed women need and expect constant affirmation, which I generally don't) and we don't have much if anything in common to talk about. They also tend not to do 'banter'!
I'm now in the process of growing both a software company and an investment one and women look at me as though I'm some abnormal freak when I explain it. Men will give me pointers, share their own business projects, or, if they aren't business minded, cheer me on. Women take it as a personal attack and assume I'm trying to make them feel bad. I can be incredibly careful about how and what I say, and they will STILL try to read between the lines and find some way to interpret my words as an insult. This is despite the same women moaning about lack of female representation in boardrooms and other 'male dominated' areas. I'm not a feminist by today's standards, but you'd think women who make a point of telling everyone they are feminists would be generally supportive of one of their own waving the flag. But the ones I meet seem to despise it. The more outwardly feminist they are, the more they seem to hate that I'm trying to succeed. I've been told several times that I appear intimidating when I try to discuss what I'm doing (this is when they ask me directly - I NEVER make the mistake of starting these conversations), even if I compliment them on whatever they are doing and offer to help or motivate them to achieve things themselves.
With most women everything is made into a nasty competition, which I'm not interested in at all. People say men are the competitive ones, but women are insanely competitive with other women and get very emotional. Men will be openly competitive, but in a positive way and without any of the bitchiness, and they don't hate you as a person if you do better at something. They are competitive just within the boundaries of that specific activity. Women will hate you as an entire person if you do the same with them. There is no compartmentalisation. A man will get annoyed in a meeting, then have a drink with you afterwards. Women will never forgive you. I can and do openly admit when other women are better at me at something, and respect them for their skill and hard work. I try to learn from them so I can better my own skills in that area. I don't hate them and refuse to talk to them forever after. I genuinely want other women to be successful (I'd LOVE to have other women to discuss business and finance and other things with), but the majority seem incapable of having just (to me) a normal friendship. If you either don't play by their specific social rules or they perceive you as a threat, then you've got no chance!
Sorry for the rant! Had a long day!
