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former smokestack friend


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
once met a person through a board game group. We tried to hang out a few times, but he wasn't the nicest person at that time. So, we just kind of fell out of each others' lives and that was that. Probably 3-4 years later, he reached out to me, apologized for his behavior before, and wanted to date.

I decided I'd give him a chance. I didn't enjoy his dating prospects for me. He was "entitled" to live off of disability for the rest of his life and could only do certain types of jobs. He was never willing to do other jobs even if he could initially do them and they were full time with benefits. He apparently couldn't work full time (supposedly) because it was too hard on his body, he was picky about what kind of part time jobs he had.

After that didn't work out, we stayed as friends and tried fwb stuff for a bit.

One factor was that he would actually turn certain part time jobs down because they'd want to pay him too much that he could lose his disability money. This was in addition to whatever type of work the part time job was itself.

He smokes like 2 packs a day apparently and that didn't work well with me. He considered switching to vapes, but I don't know if he ever did. There were some times where he smoked less or waited until after he left hanging around me and I couldn't always recognize this with everything I do.

His smoking has gotten in the way from my friends wanting to hang with him for a 5-10 hour board game. He was considered because of his definite interest, but this was just too much.

He invited me over recently to enjoy an outdoor fire pit and meet one of his best friends, who also smoked. They were into mainstream horror movies, keeping up with wrestling, and at least the best friend liked hunting and fishing. I don't mind wrestling, but I don't desire to keep up with it either. The other things, I don't desire to watch or do on a regular basis unless if it was a compromise on interests participation with a (potential) partner.

This friend is a bit handier than me. He helped me with replacing a closet bar, and I took him out twice as re-payment on my own.

This same friend was supposed to help me paint, but that has now fallen through. We had previously agreed (in this detail) that I would take him to a favorite bar of his (on a different day) and that I would be a designated driver that day. I also told him I could not hang with him at the bar because I might be tempted by the alcohol there and I would not enjoy myself there. So, I told him he could hang out there by himself or with others and I would go to a non-bar or do ride sharing during the time I am not with him.

He wanted to invite his best friend to help me paint, and I did get along with his best friend too. I was okay with that. But then he started asking me for pizza, and then I started stating that I could buy pizza and not take him to the bar or keep our agreement of taking him to the bar but not both. He got upset at me because I didn't want to get him (and his friend pizza, presumedly on top of the already agreed upon trip to the bar and back). He is supposedly on a keto diet and can't have pizza and he doesn't tell me what I can get him. He doesn't seem to stick to the diet enough and it's just confusing all around.

Another logistic the friend added for paint day was that he wanted to come at 730 PM instead of 6 PM because he didn't want to deal with rush hour traffic. I told him that that was okay but that we'd probably have to be up later to complete the work.

He then proceeded to get upset at me also because I wouldn't play a board game with him in the same day after he was done with the painting. I have let him know before that I work a full time job and had work the following day. This is something he should be aware of already as we've hung out enough.

I've tried to be open to my differences with others because that can make it easier for me to be with others that might be very different than me. Plus, there aren't many people

Then, he told me that he had to think about if he still wanted to help me paint or not, wanted to talk to his friends, and would get back to me on the day of. Instead of waiting for another response, I told him that we should go our separate ways and he agreed.

I feel a weird mix of being free and frustration at the same time.


Well-Known Member
I know humour isn't our best quality, but laugh at life and experiences that way don't take it personally.
So like men are from Mars and women are from Venus and don't expect him to fix anything around the house after asking 5x time....typical
We aspie girls need more aspie girlfriends, so we can in our own way discuss this.


Well-Known Member
Ok so we put this out there in hope that our trajectories will bring forth a fruitful harvest, so test waters for comparability and filter out the ones can't learn to as thread said 'define themselves'
So I was handed keyring that had pic of old women and it said waiting for perfect man. So boy oh boy do we have a lot of work to do....imagine a keyring that yields some hope...Nd then oh gosh, he's perfect and taken. My where do I find one for me.


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Well-Known Member
So like someone invited Karl, he's also taurus so I was already thinking avoid him. So he's on this mission to prove to everyone how competent and together he is, oh my word! If a person with asd could be narcisstic then he's the prototype.
But the thing is that he pitches up with no ideas of his own, no creativity zero. Then he takes over others projects and like almost moves in like a hermit and leaves them in dust. So I just echnored him and continue with my project, trying to put boxes around to protect my work but he comes over and starts telling me about soldat who must reply to general, affirmative, over. As true as Bob he even started painting over my work. In the end put him in charge, nog alles

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