For how many time you can mask?

[Louie]

TRIGGER WARNING: self harm, sensory overload, meltdown, drugs.

First of all: this is not a competition. I'm only curious and I don't live with another people on the spectrum besides my cousin, and he doesn't mask.

When I experience sensory overload, I do one of theese three things:
1- if I'm alone or in home, I go to a dark place and hug my knees. Sometimes I ask my mom to hug me, but sometimes even her touch is bad for me.
2- if I'm in one place with people and I can't go home, I get super agitated, I think I do this to hide my stims. I start talking loud, singing, shaking my feet, moving my toes (I hate feeling them in my shoes), riping my nails and pinching my hands.
3- if I'm in one place with people and I can't go home, and I'm tremendously tired: I sleep.

I didn't knew the motivation for my agony and theese things until last year, when I had my diagnosis.
For better or for worst, masking helped me a lot of times, but it made me anxious, depressed and made my OCD worse (so I don't recommend).

But, getting back to the question: I went to a congress to present an article. Six days without my mom, sharing the room with 3 other people. I didn't stop masking all this time, with only little pauses to stim in the bathroom (and I didn't knew what was stim back them, was only something that I always did to "de-stress"). I was on meds too. Two antidepressants and an anxiolytic. I think they help me. I'm still on meds. Take them since I was 15.

And you? What was your biggest time masking?

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Welcome Louie
I hope you make friends here, I have. What you are going through sounds very difficult. Masking and stims is a very personal topic. I think you can learn new stims, new ways to destress that do not cause you injury.

I will try and find something simple. I think english is not your first language, so if I gave you a link it might be confusing. You write very well, I mean no offense.

Here are some search terms
"Alternate nostril breathing, reset vega nerve"

This is a breathing technique. It is good for stress. Also I like to use a special exercise tool, one that is made for guitar players, to strengthen the grip. Also I have a "pony clamp" it is a tool for clamping sheet material, I use it for hand exercise.

If I am mistaken about your native language base, I apologize. I mean no offense. I do not believe I could have done what you describe, in attending this conference.

I want you to feel welcome here, we want everyone to feel welcome here.

Most people here, who have spoken about it openly, and who stim use some sort of toy. This is not really a children's toy, but a toy just the same.

Do you have a weighted blanket? These are highly regarded. Many people take issue with the texture of clothing. Myself I prefer to wear the clothing similar of a gymnast under my outer clothing. Something like tights. This is not a common practice for autistics. Many people use " noise-canceling headphones" and claim that they help. These can also be used to listen to music, or recordings of nature sounds, such as running water.

Everyone is different.
I like hard candy very much, I buy lemon drops or something very tart. The sharp and strange taste is a distraction. Respectfully I would encourage you to stop using anything like soda or coffee, anything that contains caffeine will add to stress.

I am sure others will have more advice for you, if you wish.

Be well

 

[Raggamuffin]

Been masking since I was young. Saw my brother and a kid in my own class being bullied at the school we went to. Both of them are on the spectrum too. I saw what behaviour was triggering others to mock and bully them - so I began to mask. This behaviour continues to this day. I'm looking at around 25+ years.

It's exhausting.

Ed

 

[Wolfsage]

School was the longest and included long bus rides. Confined space perfume, loud voices, and people sat right beside. Going to and coming from school.

 

[Louie]

Welcome Louie
I hope you make friends here, I have. What you are going through sounds very difficult. Masking and stims is a very personal topic. I think you can learn new stims, new ways to destress that do not cause you injury.

I will try and find something simple. I think english is not your first language, so if I gave you a link it might be confusing. You write very well, I mean no offense.

Here are some search terms
"Alternate nostril breathing, reset vega nerve"

This is a breathing technique. It is good for stress. Also I like to use a special exercise tool, one that is made for guitar players, to strengthen the grip. Also I have a "pony clamp" it is a tool for clamping sheet material, I use it for hand exercise.

If I am mistaken about your native language base, I apologize. I mean no offense. I do not believe I could have done what you describe, in attending this conference.

I want you to feel welcome here, we want everyone to feel welcome here.

Most people here, who have spoken about it openly, and who stim use some sort of toy. This is not really a children's toy, but a toy just the same.

Do you have a weighted blanket? These are highly regarded. Many people take issue with the texture of clothing. Myself I prefer to wear the clothing similar of a gymnast under my outer clothing. Something like tights. This is not a common practice for autistics. Many people use " noise-canceling headphones" and claim that they help. These can also be used to listen to music, or recordings of nature sounds, such as running water.

Everyone is different.
I like hard candy very much, I buy lemon drops or something very tart. The sharp and strange taste is a distraction. Respectfully I would encourage you to stop using anything like soda or coffee, anything that contains caffeine will add to stress.

I am sure others will have more advice for you, if you wish.

Be well

Thank you so much for your answer. I'll follow your advice. You're right. English isn't my first language, is portuguese. Sorry for my bad english.
I don't have an weighted blanket, but I google it and it seems wonderful. I'll buy one.
I really like to pressure my chest when I'm feeling anxious. It makes me feel better, so I think it can work for me.
I already bought some fidget toys online. Hope they get here soon.

Be well. Have a nice day ♥

 

[Louie]

Been masking since I was young. Saw my brother and a kid in my own class being bullied at the school we went to. Both of them are on the spectrum too. I saw what behaviour was triggering others to mock and bully them - so I began to mask. This behaviour continues to this day. I'm looking at around 25+ years.

It's exhausting.

Ed

Hi. I think I understand you.
I'm trying to stop masking, but I think I'm addicted to it. It makes me tired and sad, but everytime I'm on a stressful situation, I come back to it. Is like watching my body move alone. Everyday I come home exhausted and I can't even eat.
Hope that you can be totaly your true self someday. I'm trying to be mine.
Have a nice day ♥

 

[Louie]

School was the longest and included long bus rides. Confined space perfume, loud voices, and people sat right beside. Going to and coming from school.

School is really hard. Hope that everything is okay with you now. Thanks for your answer ♥

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Did you teach yourself to write a foreign language? I believe you are a scholar of high reputation. Portuguese is a very difficult language to learn.

There are many here who are also very smart, and some scholars too. There is great faculty in the west with translation software, to allow you to actively translate from foreign language to your native language. I do not know how they work, but I know people who do.
You write in english very well, it is a complex language to learn, you need not ever apologize for such a high level of competency. I admire your skill and courage.

In addition to "alternate nostril breathing" and " weighted blanket" there is also "hand exercises, stroke recovery" or "hand exercises neurological impairment"

I think you should be able to enter in any specific phrase like those and then translate into Portuguese, but I don't know how it is done

The beauty of hand exercise is it is a socially acceptable practice, and it gives one the benefit of greater dexterity. Hand exercise is popular with those in recovery from injury, those who type on a keyboard all day, those who do mountain climbing, and many other pursuits.

I have something else that may help

 

[Skittlebisquit]

This is called a harness ring in english, it may well be available for you locally, any similar shape will do. See "macrame, cordage and rings"This one is a relic, I wear it around my neck on a string, to remind me of something important.

This is a modern type of cord called "paracord" It is synthetic.

What one does with it is to cut several sections about 3 meters each and fasten them to the ring.

Then braid or knot the string together. If people ask, you may say it is a craft project, or that it is to be a belt, or tack for your friend's horse or a plant hanger for your mother, or anything like that.

I find it soothing, to tie knots and to do braids with it, then simply take it all apart. I believe I paid $7 US for about 30 meters of it. I like the paracord best, as it is easier to untie, and is somewhat elastic.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Have you heard of the "Emotional Freedom Technique". You can do it in a bathroom stall if you have to, and it really helps.

 

[Wolfsage]

School is really hard. Hope that everything is okay with you now. Thanks for your answer ♥

Nightmares ocassionally along with some fear of being forced to go back. But, it's better now. Graduated years ago.

 

[ZebraAutismo]

More then a couple of hours on my best days is super hard and usually leads to emotional burn out.

 

[Louie]

More then a couple of hours on my best days is super hard and usually leads to emotional burn out.

It's an extremely tiresome thing. I think even my reasoning slows down. Thanks for your answer

 

[Louie]

Did you teach yourself to write a foreign language? I believe you are a scholar of high reputation. Portuguese is a very difficult language to learn.

There are many here who are also very smart, and some scholars too. There is great faculty in the west with translation software, to allow you to actively translate from foreign language to your native language. I do not know how they work, but I know people who do.
You write in english very well, it is a complex language to learn, you need not ever apologize for such a high level of competency. I admire your skill and courage.

In addition to "alternate nostril breathing" and " weighted blanket" there is also "hand exercises, stroke recovery" or "hand exercises neurological impairment"

I think you should be able to enter in any specific phrase like those and then translate into Portuguese, but I don't know how it is done

The beauty of hand exercise is it is a socially acceptable practice, and it gives one the benefit of greater dexterity. Hand exercise is popular with those in recovery from injury, those who type on a keyboard all day, those who do mountain climbing, and many other pursuits.

I have something else that may help

I didn't learn english alone. I studied the basics in elementary school, and I always loved cartoons and comics, so I started reading them in english when I was 13. After that, I had the privilege of studying in a great public school, where the students could attend two foreign language's classes. The first one was english (for two years), and the other one we could choose between spanish and french (one year). I think this experience made me improve a lot.
I'm really gratefull for your compliment. It means a lot

I liked the harness ring idea. Sometimes I do crochet. I like to make circles and undo it. It's relaxing. I even used to do it when I was on my english classes .
I draw a lot too. One time my english teacher from elementary school "kicked me out" of the class because I was drawing . I had already finished the lesson and the other kids were small talking.
I still feel that I was wronged LOL.
But no heartache. She was a great woman handling an class with 30 energetic kids.

 

[Louie]

Have you heard of the "Emotional Freedom Technique". You can do it in a bathroom stall if you have to, and it really helps.

Wow. Interesting. I'll try it. Thanks for your tip

 

[Progster]

For about an hour, then I need a break, but it all depends on my 'spoons' (energy levels) or stress levels that day.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

View attachment 67997
This is called a harness ring in english, it may well be available for you locally, any similar shape will do. See "macrame, cordage and rings"This one is a relic, I wear it around my neck on a string, to remind me of something important.

This is a modern type of cord called "paracord" It is synthetic.
View attachment 67995
What one does with it is to cut several sections about 3 meters each and fasten them to the ring.

Then braid or knot the string together. If people ask, you may say it is a craft project, or that it is to be a belt, or tack for your friend's horse or a plant hanger for your mother, or anything like that.

I find it soothing, to tie knots and to do braids with it, then simply take it all apart. I believe I paid $7 US for about 30 meters of it. I like the paracord best, as it is easier to untie, and is somewhat elastic.

I forgot all about macrame! I learned it in high school, and it's something I really zoned out with!

 

[ForestGumpett]

Hi and welcome!

Couple of things I’ve picked up but I’m not a doctor or any kind of medical person and this is just a personal opinion, that is all.

I believe with all my heart that the meds they are giving out, the antidepressants, will make people much worse and more depressed. The fact that you said they started giving you them at 15 and your still on them at 20, and this being the time a persons brain is developing (per what I read in medical books) this actually makes me livid that people are actually doing this to others, esp the young people!

So that is my opinion as I said, not a doctor and will prolly not be a popular opinion. No matter, I believe this. Feel free to check behind my claims.

The link below is an article, and honestly I can’t stand the man Michael Moore or his opinions...until this one! If you do more googling on psychiatric drugs and killings you will find a list that will blow your mind it’s so long. They (people on these drugs) are using knives, trucks or anything they can get their hands on to kill? Why? The only common denominator of all these killings are the antidepressants. Below is only one article on one incident.

The Real Lesson of Columbine: Psychiatric Drugs Induce Violence – Citizens Commission on Human Rights of Colorado

“Dr. Tracy says the Columbine killers’ brains were awash in serotonin, the chemical which causes violence and aggression and triggers a sleep-walking disorder in which a person literally acts out their worst nightmare. Harris became obsessed with homicidal and suicidal thoughts “within weeks” after he began taking Zoloft, according to Dr. Tracy.”

 

[Louie]

Hi and welcome!

Couple of things I’ve picked up but I’m not a doctor or any kind of medical person and this is just a personal opinion, that is all.

I believe with all my heart that the meds they are giving out, the antidepressants, will make people much worse and more depressed. The fact that you said they started giving you them at 15 and your still on them at 20, and this being the time a persons brain is developing (per what I read in medical books) this actually makes me livid that people are actually doing this to others, esp the young people!

So that is my opinion as I said, not a doctor and will prolly not be a popular opinion. No matter, I believe this. Feel free to check behind my claims.

The link below is an article, and honestly I can’t stand the man Michael Moore or his opinions...until this one! If you do more googling on psychiatric drugs and killings you will find a list that will blow your mind it’s so long. They (people on these drugs) are using knives, trucks or anything they can get their hands on to kill? Why? The only common denominator of all these killings are the antidepressants. Below is only one article on one incident.

The Real Lesson of Columbine: Psychiatric Drugs Induce Violence – Citizens Commission on Human Rights of Colorado

“Dr. Tracy says the Columbine killers’ brains were awash in serotonin, the chemical which causes violence and aggression and triggers a sleep-walking disorder in which a person literally acts out their worst nightmare. Harris became obsessed with homicidal and suicidal thoughts “within weeks” after he began taking Zoloft, according to Dr. Tracy.”

Thanks for your answer ♥
I'll read more about this.
I don't know in other cases, but I think the meds helped me a lot.
I'm a giant "cry baby" cause I have emotional lability.
I tryied to leave the meds by myself when I was 17/18yo, but it made my anxiety, depression and ocd symptoms a lot worse (the emotional lability too).
I would cry anytime, for hours long sometimes. The obssessive thoughts would never stop, and I would lost hours and hours on repetitive behaviors.
It was a hell-like experience. I used to have suicide thoughts non-stop and would sleep all day long.
I think the serotonin overload can cause violence, but in my case, I have a lack of it.
I hope that someday I can leave the meds. I pray for it everyday, but now I know that I'm better with them.
I go to the doctor once in every 2 months. She's a very comppetent professional, that was reccomended by the doctor that took care of me when I was a child.
She keeps contact with me and always ask how I'm doing.
I don't think is good to promote medication use without prescription. Everything that I used until now was prescribed by my trusted doctor (an psychiatrist).
I'm on terapy too (and this is very important).
I think if I wasn't on medication, I could never have done all the things that I did: field classes on dusty loud places, article presentations, even get a job.
All this were very stressful things, that I could never done so depressed and anxious as I am without meds.
More one time: I don't think medication is cool. Sometimes I'm even ashamed of it (it feels like my body don't work the way it should).
I pray for the day that I'll be free of it. Of everything. When I will have no need to be medicated, to mask, to copy people. When I'll be free.
But now I'm just trying to get along well with it.

 

[laurie]

TRIGGER WARNING: self harm, sensory overload, meltdown, drugs.

First of all: this is not a competition. I'm only curious and I don't live with another people on the spectrum besides my cousin, and he doesn't mask.

When I experience sensory overload, I do one of theese three things:
1- if I'm alone or in home, I go to a dark place and hug my knees. Sometimes I ask my mom to hug me, but sometimes even her touch is bad for me.
2- if I'm in one place with people and I can't go home, I get super agitated, I think I do this to hide my stims. I start talking loud, singing, shaking my feet, moving my toes (I hate feeling them in my shoes), riping my nails and pinching my hands.
3- if I'm in one place with people and I can't go home, and I'm tremendously tired: I sleep.

I didn't knew the motivation for my agony and theese things until last year, when I had my diagnosis.
For better or for worst, masking helped me a lot of times, but it made me anxious, depressed and made my OCD worse (so I don't recommend).

But, getting back to the question: I went to a congress to present an article. Six days without my mom, sharing the room with 3 other people. I didn't stop masking all this time, with only little pauses to stim in the bathroom (and I didn't knew what was stim back them, was only something that I always did to "de-stress"). I was on meds too. Two antidepressants and an anxiolytic. I think they help me. I'm still on meds. Take them since I was 15.

And you? What was your biggest time masking?

even after my diagnosis, spending 6 hours in a uk public school is not a great place to display asd traits. i remember beforehand when i was masking all day long i would make myself so exhausted and tired out that i would pass out as soon as i got home from school. wake up at 8pm, eat dinner, and then get to sleep at 2am, and THEN wake up again at 7am. my sleep schedule was terrible and on top of that i was having panic attacks in the middle of the night due to stressing about school so much. bearing in mind i was like 13 at the time and didn't understand what was wrong with me or why i was acting like this. i still do mask A LOT especially if i'm around new people, i haven't told any of my 'close friends' not that i have many that i'm on the spectrum. i think the worst place i've been in in terms of exhaustion and masking recently was last year, my only friends would make fun of asd traits all the time and were just generally not nice people. alas i felt the need to stay around them as i didn't have anyone else to go to. one of them in particular was very performative, she would post inforgraphics on autism awareness month and then make jokes to me about people stimming and sunflower landyards. but i knew that if i ever called this behaviour out she'd tell me to take a joke or tell me she could demonise nd traits becauase she was self diagnosed adhd (note i have nothing against self diagnosis i just dont like when people use and excuses to make fun of nd traits that people cant help)

so yeah, im going to uni soon so maybe i'll update on masking but i expect i'll be doing it a lot because some people have been very anti-autism in my previous schools.