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Food and sensations

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Mush, Aug 11, 2020.

  1. Mush

    Mush Hiker

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    As a child I can’t begin to tell you how much of a big deal eating was. It was probably the most major issue I faced on a daily basis with my family and socially. The hypersensitivity to textures in food (among other things), has been a huge problem in my life. And continues to be so occasionally.

    Recently at a social gathering the idea was to order pizza for dinner. Both couples we were having dinner with known about my autism. The issue came when ordering.

    I can only eat your basic, boring, cheese pizza from a shop. At home I can make my own with more ingredients because I put things on that aren’t normally considered pizza toppings.

    If something goes into my mouth that is not texturally acceptable, I will quite literally throw it up or spit it out. I have no control over this. It has happened while eating out at restaurants, having dinner at someone’s house, parties, weddings, basically every place you don’t want it happening.

    As a child and teenager it caused a LOT of problems, particularly with my mother, who would verbally abuse me and shame and guilt me for hours each night for refusing to eat certain foods (peas, anything slimy feeling, like tomatoes, eggplant etc.). I can’t tell you how many times I fell asleep at the table because that’s where I had to stay until bed time if I didn’t eat what was on my plate.

    So back to dinner the other night. I actually stopped the entire conversation and said quite clearly that part of autism is a strong and immovable aversion to certain tastes and textures, and that no, you cannot train yourself to overcome it.

    One of the ladies said “It’s not all about you.” to me. To which I replied, “I know, but you all keep harassing me about what I will and won’t eat, so I’m telling you why so you don’t do it anymore.”

    It stopped everyone in their conversation. My wife was very supportive of me and backed me up.

    Of all the issues autism has brought me, food has been one of the most difficult. As a child there were many times I would not eat because the texture and certain flavours of food meant I was physically unable to consume what was on offer.

    Thankfully my wife is a tremendously good cook and makes virtually every meal texturally perfect. She has been a great blessing in my life.

    Autism is part of you. It’s as immovable from you as your skull. The issues it brings are daily and life long. Being misunderstood is something you must deal with your entire life.

    I often leave a social situation/interaction wondering if I said the right things. If my posture and facial expressions were right. Did I talk too much about a topic. Did I make them bored. Did I appear involved and interested.

    I know people notice the odd behaviour. My wife often tells me that people ask her about me and why don’t do certain ‘normal’ things.

    Dunno, guess I’m just venting a little. I’m sick and tired of people treating me like a second class citizen sometimes because I’m not neurotypical.
     
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  2. menander

    menander Well-Known Member It's My Birthday!

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    They now call it a Feeding Disorder. Many have them on the spectrum and it can be disabling. You are so lucky to have a spouse to help you.
     
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  3. Giraffes

    Giraffes Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I feel you, you simply put forward a clear dietary need and got insult and presumption, often this kind of things leaves me feeling 'why bother' the response often from N/T people if i share my 'differences' is to express their view that i'm making clear selfish choices, and are unable to accept that i'm just being me.
     
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  4. Mary Terry

    Mary Terry Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Order what you want to eat. Others can order whatever they want. Sheesh, why must everyone kowtow to others? You were more polite than I would have been if someone criticized my food order.
     
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  5. Mush

    Mush Hiker

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    Another issue comes when there is only one cheese pizza ordered and suddenly everyone wants a piece. I kinda look like an asshole when I hold the box closed in front of me because I can’t just eat some of the other pizzas on the table like everyone else.
     
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  6. Misery

    Misery Photo-Negative V.I.P Member

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    Yes, this is important.

    DO NOT just do things simply because others are doing things. Down that road lies madness.

    Simply order something else from the start. There's a reason why restaurants ask each person individually what they want. If the others dont like it? Well, bloody tough... that's why it's YOUR order, not theirs. If they INSIST on ordering as a group? DONT GO IN THE FIRST PLACE. They dont like that? Well, maybe they should learn to not be total snot blobs, then. Once they're done learning how not to suck, THEN you go with them.

    Or do as I do and go "LOL NOPE" every time someone asks about the idea of a restaurant. I've never understood the concept. "eating time" does not equal "talky talky time" in my mind. It equals "get the heck out of my room, I'm trying to have a meal" time. I dont get why people must be around others and blab their stupid heads off while shoveling rather distressing things into their mouths.


    Dont worry so much about what others think. Dont worry so much about trying to be the model student, so to speak. BE YOURSELF, simple as that. And if they dont like that, well.... maybe they're not friends to begin with.
     
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  7. Jeremiah

    Jeremiah Chaotic Neutral

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    I have the same problem, to a lesser extent. Unground meat can be difficult to eat, which caused my mother gray hairs when I was a kid. I also have difficulty with different porridges, and fruits like oranges and pineapples.
    And it's always the texture, never the taste.
    Oddly enough, vegetables have never been a problem.
     
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  8. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    l say order 2 cheese pizzas. One for you, one for obnoxious people. Then you won't feel bad, or supersize it.
     
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2020
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  9. Progster

    Progster Gone sideways to the sun V.I.P Member

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    I would just order something for myself and let them order what they want, and tell them I can't eat what they are having. It's not up to other people to tell me what I should and shouldn't eat. Sensory issues like this should be respected and accommodated, in the same way as, for example, a nut allergy would be respected.
     
  10. SusanLR

    SusanLR Well-Known Member

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    Textures are the problem. I was never scolded or told it was bad when I got something in my mouth
    that needed to come out when eating at home.

    Other people came up with all sorts of remarks at my eating techniques.
    I hate celery. Get a dish with bits of it cut up in it, immediately I start taking it out with my fork
    or spoon. Same with pieces of red stuff in it. Like red peppers.

    In my teens, eating lunch with other kids, they started making fun of me making noise chewing,
    how my mouth looked crooked as I ate, it wasn't always shut. Their's wasn't either when they were talking away.
    Well, that stayed on my mind and I started practicing to do differently.

    The person I live with now gets onto me all the time because I don't eat the plate clean.
    Always leave bits and pieces of food on it. To try and eat it totally clean is somehow sickening to me.
    I won't sit there and scrap the plate clean with the fork.
    And if I leave a sip of whatever I'm drinking in the bottom of the glass or bottle... it's a terrible thing.
    He's finally stopped saying so much about it. But, I know the thoughts are there.
     
  11. ZebraAspie

    ZebraAspie Well-Known Member

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    I get it. I can thing of plenty of foods I can’t physically swallow (salmon ) pair that with have Coeliac Disease (I have to be on a gluten free diet). My options are limited and people can be awful. I dread going to restaurants with some people because feel need to comment on my food choices. Yes I would rather have nachos then a steak. I steak may be gluten free but I still want to eat it. (I don’t eat that many different meats because of the aversion to the texture and taste so people think I’m vegetarian. I eat chicken and pork thogh).
     
  12. Ashley Smith

    Ashley Smith Active Member

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    I haven't related so much to a thread in a long time!! To this day i hate eating in front of people because of the amount of grief i've gotten for it because i have such bad food texture issues. Especially at home growing up. And now i'm allergic to dairy so that's like a third of my diet i need to cut out....somehow. It would be easier to adjust if i could just eat normally. i can't tolerate a lot of textures. Like most meats; my dad's great at cooking ground chicken every which way, but anything else its not guarented i can eat it. Almost all fruits and veggies. Orange juice and applesauce and sometimes peaches (rarely) and that's it. Tomato pasta sauce is as close as i get to veggies. It makes eating in front of people so hard...and having to adjust my diet for good allergies so so difficult...i have so much shame and embarrasment and guilt for something i really can't help. Food texture issues cause autism.