Feeling extreme depression currently.

[Metalhead]

A good friend of mine posted a public message with a statement of suicidal intention.

I had to cancel my therapy sessions for the rest of the month since my boss said she needed me in the office every business day this month since other people are taking time off.

My life has been reduced to nothing but work, sleep, beer and Internet. And I can't even go out on weekends that much since the closest bus stop that runs on weekends where I live now is over five miles away from my house. I don't drive, so I have to rely on public transportation.

And nobody has time to visit me on the weekends since all of my RL friends have their own lives and their own families that they are happy with. I feel extreme depression over all of this being combined on me this month.

 

[OkRad]

I read an article that said al;most everyone is feeling this. The pandemic has wiped out years of stabilization and mental health in "normal" people. There is a whole sea of damaged people. I hope you can find peace.

 

[Thinx]

This sounds hard. I guess you can't reschedule the therapist to a time outside work hours? It's difficult to have to miss your therapy. Or could you do phone sessions? Saw a guy on an electric scooter the other day, could that work for you? Has the bus been recently changed, or did you think it would be ok?

With it being for a month, could it be an opportunity to try some ideas, like walking a while in nature daily, or meditation, or a project? I am currently growing pumpkins, it just happened, I had some seeds and they came up, the frosts went on forever so they were repotted indoors and lived on sills, getting big. Now they have their own raised beds, finally after the frosts. They are about to flower, 9 large plants! Could you get interested in something practical like that? Or get a pet?

 

[VictorR]

Have you told your boss about the sessions? You may not need full disclosure, but usually if you explain that you have a medical appointment scheduled they'll be understanding and find a way to make things work.

 

[Aspychata]

Bike would mean fast commute and weight loss, can u bike anywhere? I biked in the snow in Finland, it was my only means of transportation.

 

[paloftoon]

I recommend scheduling one therapy session within the month and calling in sick for that one day. If your therapist allows you to do multiple sessions in a day and you both have the availability, then go for it. Totally appropriate given the circumstances, but your excuse should be you are having a headache and exhausted or something like this.

Get a doctor's note for your job if you need to- just show up to your PCP or CVS Minute Clinic and tell them you need a doctor's note and explain your situation.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Hope you feel better. Try giving speeches or reading aloud, it seems to help. Also surf for comedy. No murder shows, or weird cartoons, either, not for me. Since I went without digital entertainment i noticed that it affects me, what i watch. Also do you smoke cigarettes? I am doing ok on the gum. My depression is worse when I drink, smoke, and use caffeine $$$$exercise cures depression, i promise.$$$

C'mon get a bicycle, what could possibly go wrong?

 

[unperson]

Have some driving lessons, cars are good. You could visit people.

 

[Metalhead]

Thanks for all of the supportive messages.

I have decided to start going to the movies after work again now that I am fully vaccinated and theatres are open again. I can't stay out too late since I have to catch the last bus home, but I can catch an earlier showing of most movies and be home before dark.

I can't afford both a car and my house at the same time, so no driving lessons for me.

I am getting a storage shed installed on my back porch, though. I think I will buy a bike once that has been set up and store it in there, and then bike on weekends when the weather is nice. I don't know the first thing to look for when it comes to buying a bike, though. I know how to ride one, but now I am almost 280 lbs and 6'4", I am going to need to find a bike that can handle a guy my size without breaking down rapidly.

 

[Barymore]

I'm sorry to hear things are so difficult right now! I'm thinking of you and hope the cloud lifts again soon!

 

[Skittlebisquit]

On the bike thing, I would say go to a bike shop, and ask for help. They make great seats these days, they call them saddles sometimes , no clue why.
I pace the floor a lot indoors, it seems to help. I am on the west coast USA so it's summer here and rarely rains. The sleep cycle is adjustable. My sweet spot is to be awake at 4am, blue everywhere and birdsong. I exercise and do my self care routine early, and am asleep by 9 30 usually. It seems we are all different. Buy dark choc chips and nuts instead of chips. There is much to be gained from studying nutrition. Keep living house plants around, mine are all veggie starts......

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

A little humor to brighten your blues. You said you needed a bike. I have always wanted a bike seat like this, and now I know it exists:

 

[Metalhead]

Well, I cannot see my therapist at all this month because she is tied up with group sessions all evening long after I get off work.

I decided that now that I am fully vaccinated, I am going to invest in some movie tickets and trips to fine dining instead. As well as a bike now that I won’t be paying for therapy for the next three weeks. Hell, it is about time I got out more. Before the pandemic started, I was going to the movies a few times a week and watching everything that hit the local multiplex with a few exceptions (little kid movies and movies by Dinesh D’Souza I avoid, but I watch everything else).