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Featured Ever Quit A Job Over A Meltdown?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Weezer, Mar 5, 2019.

  1. Weezer

    Weezer Active Member

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    Just wondering if any of you have employment problems. I have been so overwhelmed in the past that I have loaded my tools and walked right out the door on the spot. What can be done to stop this cycle? Help
     
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  2. Nervous Rex

    Nervous Rex High-functioning autistic V.I.P Member

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    Almost, many times. At least once this year, twice last year, and once the year before. I grit my teeth, keep my reactions internal and try not to show them. Later on, I calm down and realize that I really don't want to be out of a job. It also helps me to remember that it would take me several months to find a new job.

    In the moment of the meltdown, it helps me to realize that it is a meltdown, and that I will feel differently about things later.
     
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  3. Major Tom

    Major Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    More times than I can count... It's a constant issue with me too. I finally found a company I've been working for a while now though.
     
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  4. AGXStarseed

    AGXStarseed Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to be the odd one out here, but I haven't felt the need to quit over a meltdown. I've only ever had one meltdown while at work and it was a combination of having a stressful day and because of issues going on at home.
    Thankfully, I recognized the signs before it happened and my managers excused me when I told them what was happening, after which I locked myself in one of the toilets at the back of the building as I had my meltdown - which included me slamming myself against the walls, dragging my fingernails across my head and letting out several loud screams while my whole body just shook.
    After around 15 minutes, I emerged from the toilet pretty much exhausted from it, with the staff (who are aware of my Aspergers) been really supportive and even offering to let me go early; I turned down the offer and just got back to doing what work I could while wearing my ear defenders for the rest of the day.

    I'm sorry that you're having such problems. Is there anything you, your colleagues and/or your managers can do to help you out?
     
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  5. Clueless in Canada

    Clueless in Canada Well-Known Member

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    Every part time/summer type job I ever had beginning in high school and then when I was a university student came to an end prematurely because I couldn't cope in some way. Often it was a sudden change, other times it was just the exhaustion of dealing with people. I eventually became a school teacher and although I had difficulties and wanted to quit it was a union position so a person is not easily fired from it. I lasted nearly twenty years before having to quit from exhaustion and overwhelm.

    Specifically, I had a summer job as an inventory data collector which I found very stressful as we were expected to do it quickly. Part way through the summer a new manager came in and wanted to change many things. One day on the job he began telling me to do things differently and I just took off my smock and handed it to him along with the data machine and said,' I quit'. I had to do this in order to avoid a public meltdown.
     
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  6. Pats

    Pats Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    You know, when I was much younger I had a job at this trucking company with a wonderful boss. This guy come off his truck and started working in the office and I didn't like it because, as a co-worker, he was always TELLING me to do this and that. My boss told me one day that she was going to be really busy with some special projects so she was going to put him over me. I didn't say anything, but knew I couldn't handle it and the next day I stayed home and wasn't planning to go back. (At the time, I didn't know about the autism). So my boss called me at home and talked to me and eventually I told her I couldn't work with him as my boss. So she said okay and asked me to come back to work and she would remain my boss and I wouldn't have to work with him. So if it weren't for having an amazing boss, I would have left/lost that job and I really liked that job.
     
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  7. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    Twice, at least!

    One time, I worked at Target in the place where they sell food like a little fast-food place, sorta, and there's this button on the register that you push to call for assistance when the line gets too long, and the line was long and I kept pushing it and pushing it, the line getting longer and longer, out and into the aisles, and I'm pushing it and nothing! I did finish the line eventually. Then I left. They kept calling me so I turned my phone off.

    Another time, I called and said, "I won't be coming in, okay, bye!"
     
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  8. Suzanne

    Suzanne Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Yes! One was not really through meltdown, but injustice and I could not take it.

    I walked into the manger's office and told him straight that I was leaving and that I wanted full pay. I was obviously bolder than now lol. He gave me full pay and tried to cover over the unjust treatment. Probably why he gave me my wage.

    The other one was work experience whilst in college. I did not want to go to this place, but sadly I was the better option over two other females and I saw it straight away and tried to lesson the "probe" being at me and failed.

    I tried for two sessions, I think and I could not accept the rabold behaviour and especially when people were coming in a lot!

    So, I asked to speak to the manager and she did accept my reasoning and said it was a shame, because maybe my attitude would rub off! So, I walked out on that.

    I also suffered a bit of sexual harrassment and walked out.

    I am afraid, that my attitude is not one of staying power, if I cannot cope.
     
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  9. Gracey

    Gracey Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I only remember one ‘meltdown’
    (Although I wasn’t aware it was a meltdown, I thought I’d finally snapped)
    Proper ‘saw my arse’ and had to get out of there...
    ...before I did any damage.


    The remainder of the time, and countless jobs,
    it was a feeling of becoming overwhelmed,
    Again, having to get out of there Without understanding why.

    Because I didn’t know why,
    I didn’t know what to do about it.
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2019 at 8:14 AM
  10. Progster

    Progster Gone sideways to the sun V.I.P Member

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    Yes, twice this has happened, and other times I didn't quit, but lost my job over my snapping and saying something irreparable that soured my realtionship with the boss or other employees. A couple of other times, my contract wasn't renewed or I was 'let go' without my knowing the exact reason. I don't have a particularly good employment record, and this is why I am now self-employed.
     
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  11. LadyBird84

    LadyBird84 Well-Known Member

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    No, but I've really wanted to.
     
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  12. Bolletje

    Bolletje Potato chip wizard

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    No, but I have previously spent a lot of time hiding in bathrooms waiting for the meltdown to pass.
     
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  13. BraidedPony

    BraidedPony Just another person V.I.P Member

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    Bathroom breaks help. If I’m working in an office, I would look up job postings (that was always a good reality check!).
    Playing Bejeweled or looking up memes or kittens and puppies....
    So many days I would fantasize about telling the boss to (expletive deleted!)
     
  14. Nervous Rex

    Nervous Rex High-functioning autistic V.I.P Member

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    If I wrote down every imaginary conversation and argument I've had, I would be the most prolific writer in the world.
     
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  15. Aura Celeste

    Aura Celeste Active Member

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    Never mind quitting a job, I can't even get one. That's because I already know what jobs are going to traumatize me and it's almost all of them. It's not the job itself, but the stress and fast pace that everything demands these days. I can't function that fast.

    However, I ended up "getting rid of" two jobs that I had been hired to do and I didn't last even a week at either one. Both of them were nurse's aide jobs after I had finished going to school to become a nurse's aide.

    The most recent was in a nursing home with residents with dementia. Summer of 2017. People always assume I had a problem with the demented residents--WRONG. I am exceptionally sensitive and these jobs where we are taking care of the weakest and most vulnerable in society seem to attract a certain type of angry woman who is as violent with the residents as one can be without physically beating them. I had an innate understanding of the demented people. I could feel them, I could understand why they would scream and why they would get upset. I saw how they were calm with me and with good, loving caretakers, but how they started to freak out and withdraw into their dementia when these angry or other "ungrounded," phony women started to deal with them. Watching that abuse took a toll on me. However, these same angry women (who dominated the floor I was assigned to) bullied me. I felt like I was back in high school again and they were forming a clique against me. Add to that the absolutely inhuman hours that I was supposed to work and after 3 days, I got sick leave. I was just a shaky mess of tears by the end. I cried all the way home on the bus on the last day and went straight to the health center. I was crying so much I couldn't speak and had to write down what the matter was.

    The year before that, I had obtained a job taking care of a wheelchair-bound woman in her home. Unfortunately, her sister was in charge of training me. First of all, I could not understand this woman's Swedish to save my life. Not being Swedish, she had this crazy-frantic energy (as opposed to the usual calm that Swedes have) that had me on pins and needles non-stop. She didn't speak, she YELLED. To say she was impatient would be an extreme understatement. She would tell me to do something and before I had even moved to do it, she lost patience and began to do it herself and acted like I had tried and failed, when I hadn't even had time to move into position.

    The first day training with that lunatic woman--after just 4 hours with her, I was so traumatized that I had to spend the entire next day sleeping and resting in bed. Needless to say, she ended up firing me. I, being as observant and articulate (and actually being able to speak and write the language of the country I live in) as I am, wrote a full account of what happened to the agency that employed me to work with this lunatic woman whose Swedish was incomprehensible (despite having lived 30 YEARS in Sweden). So I defended myself to the agency and they apologized to me profusely.

    After 2017, I swore I would NEVER EVER work as a nurse's aide again. One thing I deeply regret, though, is that I gave up the opportunity to work with a young boy with Asperger's to take that job with the yelling crazy woman, who initially really wanted me for the job.

    Now I have no job and I've started to get help from the municipality with my troubles.
     
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  16. SimplyWandering

    SimplyWandering Well-Known Member

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    I wouldn't say I got fired, but was asked to leave with severance which at least looks better on paper.

    However i was struggling as a general manager, mainly because i am meticulous in my work and i was being micromanaged... I did have a couple meltdowns; including the usage of profain language to superiors.

    I was instrumental in setting up this new company. I felt they did me dirty.

    The good part about the whole ordeal is that it allowed me to reavaluate how I work with others and that some of it is my fault. I have since started business communcation classes to achieve my goal in obtaining business management.
     
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  17. Aspychata

    Aspychata Only you can free yourself.....

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    Me too, lol
     
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  18. AGXStarseed

    AGXStarseed Well-Known Member

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    Me three. :)
     
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  19. Aspychata

    Aspychata Only you can free yourself.....

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    But l don't have meltdowns, because l stay focused abeit the drama. You have to train yourself and then you reap the rewards. The drama only adds to your stress, so the min. you decide to release that, then you focus more on other people in job situations. It actually becomes a enlightment and a release for you. l now see, wow, l could have gotten upset, but l didn't, and life still continues on, with or without my meltdown. Maybe view this as it is better for us to create ripples then huge hurricane waves as we float aimlessly, lol.
     
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  20. JDShredds

    JDShredds Active Member

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    Oh, you know, only the first job I ever got... on the second day.

    That was over a decade ago. I've been floundering around varying means of self-employment ever since.
     
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