Does My Father Have Asperger?

[mh5000]

I've always viewed my father as a successful man, but there has always been something to him that both me and my mother viewed unique. I didn't know what Asperger is until last week. The more and more I read about it, sounds really like my dad. These are the symptoms my father have:

- My father is really bad at social interactions. He often cut people of during mid sentences, when he ask a question and someone try to explain to him, he would also cut them in mid sentence to talk about what he thinks. He also ignore it when someone say "Let me finish my sentence". Furthermore, when someone is speaking his opinion during a meeting, he would just shout his opinions and cutting that person off.

- My father really couldn't talk to other people. When I was a small kid, and his television broke down (we own a very old secondhand television so this happen very frequent), he would just make me call the technician to ask for help. The technician always ask for my father, because I sounds like a kid and he think this is a prank. My father always refuses and make me talk to him. The technician never take us seriously because he's always talking to a kid.

- He pace back and forth a lot. Everyday, my father spend a large period of time walking back and forth. At first, I just ignore it as "some of his unique warm up". But throughout time, it is getting worse. Now, he is walking back and forth for 2 hours every day, before dinner and at 22:30, for 30 minutes. Just the other day, I went to visit him at his work, and he is also walking there, back and forth, even when there are people in the room.

My mom and I always think it's just my dad's habit to be unique. I love my father, as he's a very caring father in his own way. But it is just sad to see people ignore him, or asking me to tell him something instead of doing it on their own.

 

[Catana]

Pacing isn't a symptom of autism or Asperger's. Without evidence of any autistic characteristics it sounds to me as if your father might just be your average rude jerk.

 

[onlything]

Pacing isn't a symptom of autism or Asperger's. Without evidence of any autistic characteristics it sounds to me as if your father might just be your average rude jerk.

I wouldn't be so quick to judge. There's not enough data at all.

 

[Catana]

I wouldn't be so quick to judge. There's not enough data at all.

Thanks for repeating what I just wrote. But I wonder if you missed "...might be." That's raising a possibility, not making a judgment.

 

[Juliettaa]

He often cut people of during mid sentences

I'd attribute that to rudeness and perhaps could be related to high stress level as in 'I haven't got time for this'

he would just make me call the technician to ask for help.

Phobia of using the phone maybe? I'm picking up that English may not be your first language (I could be wrong), so if this is the case with your father, is there a language barrier?

He pace back and forth a lot

Again, could be related to stress.

But it is just sad to see people ignore him, or asking me to tell him something instead of doing it on their own.

He could be ignored because he's plain rude and unapproachable.

I don't see anything in your post to suggest Aspergers.

 

[onlything]

Thanks for repeating what I just wrote. But I wonder if you missed "...might be." That's raising a possibility, not making a judgment.

'Might' can be used both as raising a possibility and making a judgment, with the latter being much more common, and this is what I misunderstood. I stand corrected.

 

[Tom]

That is really not a lot to go on. People on the spectrum usually have problems socially but are not known for being loud and dominant in conversation (mostly the opposite). There are always exceptions however. The phone thing and pacing are unusual behaviors but can have more then one cause. Try a online search for Asperger Syndrome symptoms to find the complete list of signs.

 

[SplendidSnail]

Agree with what people have said here. There's not enough data. The stuff that you listed does sound like stuff that someone with ASD would be likely to do (even pacing can be a stim), but plenty of NTs would do all of them too. So...answer is...maybe.

Has you dad done the AQ (Autism Quotient) test? Would he be willing to do so?

You can find the test here:
Autism Spectrum Quotient

You can find details about interpreting the result here:
http://aspergerstest.net/interpreting-aq-test-results/

The test isn't a true diagnosis; it only gives an idea about whether he has traits typically associated with ASD. Only a psychologist can do a true diagnosis. That said, the test would probably give better accuracy than us responding to your list of behaviours.

 

[Frostee]

My father does a lot of those things as well. He is also very blunt, in the sense that he will say straight to your face what he thinks and does not cushion it.

I remember when we were kids he'd make us go into stores for him because he couldn't go in. Odd for someone who supposedly doesn't have Aspergers.

He also does not admit that he is in the wrong, and will slam doors and walk out of rooms if required. Compromise is also a big issue with him.

I did get him to do the Aspie test and he answered all the questions wrongly so that he didn't score high. He got a lower score than my mother who is extremely socially literate.

 

[onlything]

It is possible but it is also possible that he has a mental disorder like narcissism. The thing is that, one, we do not know your father and cannot answer with high enough accuracy based on what you've written, and two, we're no professionals, so while autism is probable, it is just as probable that we may miss important symptoms of an illness, not a neurological difference.

It would be profitable for you to stop obsessing(a thing that we, aspies, tend to do a lot) and look at everything objectively. Looks like you do something I tend to do as well and that is a thought shortcut. Right now you have stated these things about your father:

- Bluntness (or harshness?)
- Bad at social situation (not understanding/counsciously rude)
- Unwillingness to talk to other people
- Pacing (stim/not stim?)
- Unwilling to compromise/see other points of view (black-white thinking/superiority/close-mindedness?)

We can only judge on what you've written so far about him and it's simply not enough to say anything for sure. So, we can only say: it's a possibility.

It may be more helpful if you go through more of autism traits and see where your father situates concerning these.

 

[SplendidSnail]

- May or may not have answered wrongly questions on the AQ test

Actually, it's a different person who said that. The OP is mh5000, while the person whose father did the Aspie test is Realist.

 

[onlything]

Actually, it's a different person who said that. The OP is mh5000, while the person whose father did the Aspie test is Realist.

That's true. Thanks for pointing it out.

 

[tducey]

I don't know if he has Asperger's or not but maybe making an appointment with a psychologist for him if he's comfortable might not hurt.

 

[Judge]

Have to concur with others here. Just not a enough information to even speculate. Where only a formal medical assessment can shed some light on what may be motivating this man's behaviors.

On occasion we do get some descriptions of people which to many of us may make it seem obvious that one could be on the spectrum of autism. Unfortunately this just isn't one of them.