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Do you have unusual abilities, or are just good at certain things that others find hard?

Jumpback

Well-Known Member
Where I get confused about myself and where others find me confusing is that I fit a lot of Autism Spectrum, but just in not stereotypical ways. So I don’t exactly seem autistic, and people think that I am smart, but then get very confused or blame me for not being good at things that others find to be pretty easy. I will try to explain

I remember a lot of things about dates, and even use them in passwords or as codes to for things, but not in a very serious way. Like, to me, 1865 is the date of the end of the civil war, so when I was at the end of something that was stressful I was using 1865 in passwords a lot. But, then, 1929 is the date of the stock market crash of 1929, so to me this date represents the beginning of hard times and chaos. But it isn’t really like I am have some mental image of things or super seriously attach dates to things, it’s just more like when I am looking for peace I gravitate towards using 1865 in passwords and what I am frustrated and see no hope, I gravitate towards using 1929 in passwords



But really the main things that I do with dates is use them as reference points to understand everything. Like, as an example, photography started in the 1820s and gradually became more common. The main purpose of art up until that time was to portray events as realistically as possible for the sake of posterity (like 17th century kings would have had photographs taken, instead of portraits painted, but these things were not an option). So in my head, impressionistic art movements starting in the later 19th century were partially a result of photography freeing up artists to be more abstract...like Vincent Van Gogh was born in 1853 and Claude Monet was born in 1840.

But, then, art in the ancient world became much more stylized, especially after move to make Greek figures seem more in motion and so on. If you don’t know about the statue of Laocoön, google it some time, it’s incredible

Then with the craze of Egyptology, especially with the discovery of almost untouched King Tuts tomb in 1922, Egyptian hieroglyphics are by nature stylized since they have to be. Then the first sound movie, “The Jazz Singer” came out in 1927, but before that the nature of silent movies sort of created a need for strong symbolism

Then the father of modern propaganda (and propaganda didn’t used to have such negative things attacked to it), Edward Bernays, was also breaking ground in the 1920s, and he did such things as opening up the market of cigarette makers by marketing cigarettes as “torches of freedom” for women and glorifying use of cigarettes by branding Lucky Strikes as the women’s cigarrettes. As a side note, crazy ass nazi propaganda, Goebels was a bit obsessed and in awe of Bernays, and used this Jewish guys ideas to sell cigarettes to turn Germans against Jews.

So, basically, ask me to explain the Chrysler building or the Empire State Building and I can write a 20 page paper

—-

Like when I talk to people, since I can jump back and forth between different things so effortlessly, people’s reactions seem to go from “Damn, did this weird ass guy just give me a PhD level lecture on the the complete history of art”, to, “I don’t know all about all that, it’s t seems very suspicious”.

I don’t know, I am forever stuck with both being ridiculously good at things that other people find to be hard, and ridiculously bad at things that other people find to be easy. Like I was talking to my dad, and he was like “you are way too smart to let this get the better of you” or something, but he just doesn’t get that although I can pretty effortlessly jump over everyone’s heads on certain things, I can never even hope to be able to be at the average persons level on certain things

—-

I’m just kind of wondering what other people on here can do which others find difficult?

Like, I have repeatedly seen that autistic spectrum people’s brains are just wired differently, so if this is true, it can’t always just be a negative

Like look at computers and playing chess, the highest level computer programs have been able to defeat even the best chess experts for a very long time. But computers cannot exist in the real world, so it just ain’t like people are stupid or computers are stupid, it’s a difference in how processing power is used or something
 
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As a gamer, I can do this:

8C8410739F5C5AEE9E10CE24F9E8ECF37F4D57E2


When I originally showed that on Steam, someone responded with: "Dude...what is wrong with you? You have to have computer-like reflexes and/or memory to handle that crap."

Well, he had it partly right.

My ability is to be able to mentally process lots of stuff *REALLY* fast. It allowed me to do stuff like that (or crazier stuff), or do things like defeat high-level tournament players in fighting games despite being too bloody lazy to practice... basically, I'd win through sheer speed. Doesnt matter how skilled the other guy is, if they cant land a hit, after all. I actually had a reputation for it, for awhile. Never figured out how that happened, it wasnt supposed to. People knowing who I am when I've never met them before is a tad bit disconcerting.

But yeah, that's what it is.

Downside: I CANT STOP DOING IT.

That's how I process stuff 24/7. It's one of the core reasons why I have no patience... because everything is bloody slow as dirt to me. AND, while I can focus on a huge number of things at once, I *cannot* "condense" that focus. So, I cant just focus on one simple task or something. If there's not enough to process, I space out, as that focus all turns inward, towards whatever screwy thing I'm then imagining. So, in class, or in any job, I'd be spaced out 99% of the time, because not enough stuff was happening. I also dont do well with activities that involve just sitting and watching stuff. Like, sure... try to watch a movie, okay. But if 90% of my mind is still looking for other stuff to latch onto, and there isnt anything, well... yeah, I'll space out, and heck with the rest of the movie.

So, this is an "ability" that's fantastically useful in video games, also useful in driving.... outright detrimental in class, or any sort of job, or social situations, or.... other things.

Also my memory is really, REALLY bad. That's my other major problem. I often say, I have a memory like a cheese grater. AKA, full of holes.

Combine "frequently spaced out" with "cheese grater memory" and you have someone who sometimes tries to do things like make a sandwich but forget the bread (yes, really).


So that's my "I'm really good at THIS, but then THIS happens" story.
 
Like many here, I can think outside the box. This allows me to come up with different ideas and solutions that can be answers to tough dilemmas or challenges. Sometimes it's hard to know what the point of thinking inside the box is, and I may miss the obvious, but that's the flip side...

I am INTP, as are many with high autistic traits or Aspergers, aswell as INTJ being common, and the practical side of the circle of understanding is largely missing from my repertoire, however I can do practical tasks with supervision and clear directions and ideally a demonstration. I am good at thinking creatively. I can handle difficulties well within the sphere of my knowledge and experience, including handling tricky interpersonal exchanges and dealing with concerns.

I focus well and work very hard, and prioritise well. I am good at pursuing goals relentlessly. I am pretty good at coming up with strategies for how I am.
 
Not really sure what l am good at. But l am extremely great at feeling insecure. But l am good at trying new things. Think l am great at flip flopping - yes l can do this, oh no l can't. But it's internal struggle, probably a neurotic struggle that comes out in my writing and so on. But l bring passion, that's it! I am great at bringing passion to what l am doing.
 
Interesting topic!

When I’m really interested in a subject, I can have a really intense focus on it. I can read pages and pages of textbooks if it’s about history or psychology, and then I can remember all of the facts I learned through that first reading. I can also focus for hours when drawing, or cleaning/fixing a typewriter. I also really love to play Tetris, and can play for hours at a time.

The downside is that this focus doesn’t work if I don’t have an interest in the subject. If I can’t do what I expect myself to be able to do, then I get really frustrated and impatient. I always had a hard time with physics, and I became very frustrated whenever I couldn’t figure out the solution.

Whenever I have to write something formal, like an essay or email, I can sort of ‘fake’ a good piece of writing. I can bang out a full essay within a few hours, even though I would never actually talk like that anywhere else. I think that I almost ‘mask’ my writing style to imitate other pieces of writing like textbooks, novels, etc. People who have read my past school work have said that it sounds more like a textbook than a student’s actual writing. I think this has some pros and cons, it makes my work seem more professional, but also kind of impersonal.
 
As a gamer, I can do this:

8C8410739F5C5AEE9E10CE24F9E8ECF37F4D57E2


When I originally showed that on Steam, someone responded with: "Dude...what is wrong with you? You have to have computer-like reflexes and/or memory to handle that crap."

Well, he had it partly right.

My ability is to be able to mentally process lots of stuff *REALLY* fast. It allowed me to do stuff like that (or crazier stuff), or do things like defeat high-level tournament players in fighting games despite being too bloody lazy to practice... basically, I'd win through sheer speed. Doesnt matter how skilled the other guy is, if they cant land a hit, after all. I actually had a reputation for it, for awhile. Never figured out how that happened, it wasnt supposed to. People knowing who I am when I've never met them before is a tad bit disconcerting.

But yeah, that's what it is.

Downside: I CANT STOP DOING IT.

That's how I process stuff 24/7. It's one of the core reasons why I have no patience... because everything is bloody slow as dirt to me. AND, while I can focus on a huge number of things at once, I *cannot* "condense" that focus. So, I cant just focus on one simple task or something. If there's not enough to process, I space out, as that focus all turns inward, towards whatever screwy thing I'm then imagining. So, in class, or in any job, I'd be spaced out 99% of the time, because not enough stuff was happening. I also dont do well with activities that involve just sitting and watching stuff. Like, sure... try to watch a movie, okay. But if 90% of my mind is still looking for other stuff to latch onto, and there isnt anything, well... yeah, I'll space out, and heck with the rest of the movie.

So, this is an "ability" that's fantastically useful in video games, also useful in driving.... outright detrimental in class, or any sort of job, or social situations, or.... other things.

Also my memory is really, REALLY bad. That's my other major problem. I often say, I have a memory like a cheese grater. AKA, full of holes.

Combine "frequently spaced out" with "cheese grater memory" and you have someone who sometimes tries to do things like make a sandwich but forget the bread (yes, really).


So that's my "I'm really good at THIS, but then THIS happens" story.

That is actually pretty cool, and amazing. I would think you would do well in fast paced jobs, or jobs that require quick decision-making. Emergency room medical and air traffic controller come to mind.
 
I am really good at research and in finding creative solutions to problems. I also am capable of maintaining extreme focus for long periods of time. I am really good at math, but I am not sure if these are unusual abilities.
 
I've come to realise I have quick and deep intuitions, but can take ages to engage them with expression and reasoning.

At the practical level I often need lots of step-by step guidance before I can cotton on. Or (of late) I break it down in my own way.

Like Jumpback I orient myself and language, science etc around history and geography - I love taking the long view as a balance to life's momentary panics.

I am both a big and small picture person.
 
That is actually pretty cool, and amazing. I would think you would do well in fast paced jobs, or jobs that require quick decision-making. Emergency room medical and air traffic controller come to mind.

Nah, it'd be a disaster.

I'm awful at communicating. And dealing with others can make me overly nervous, and then the mistakes begin. I dont deal with nervousness very well. I get twitchy and weird. Like, ER, it'd be:

ER doctor: "okay, patient is stabilized for transport! Let's get him in there! Also tell me what that gizmo says right now, I have to concentrate on pushing this thing"

Me: "uh... uh... well it's-"

*knocks device off of gurney*

Me: "oh gods... okay, dont worry, I'll just-"

*crunching noises*

And then 5 minutes later, somehow half the building is on fire.
 
Nah, it'd be a disaster.

I'm awful at communicating. And dealing with others can make me overly nervous, and then the mistakes begin. I dont deal with nervousness very well. I get twitchy and weird. Like, ER, it'd be:

ER doctor: "okay, patient is stabilized for transport! Let's get him in there! Also tell me what that gizmo says right now, I have to concentrate on pushing this thing"

Me: "uh... uh... well it's-"

*knocks device off of gurney*

Me: "oh gods... okay, dont worry, I'll just-"

*crunching noises*

And then 5 minutes later, somehow half the building is on fire.

Maybe so, but you still have amazing reflexes.
 
As a gamer, I can do this:

8C8410739F5C5AEE9E10CE24F9E8ECF37F4D57E2


When I originally showed that on Steam, someone responded with: "Dude...what is wrong with you? You have to have computer-like reflexes and/or memory to handle that crap."

Well, he had it partly right.

My ability is to be able to mentally process lots of stuff *REALLY* fast. It allowed me to do stuff like that (or crazier stuff), or do things like defeat high-level tournament players in fighting games despite being too bloody lazy to practice... basically, I'd win through sheer speed. Doesnt matter how skilled the other guy is, if they cant land a hit, after all. I actually had a reputation for it, for awhile. Never figured out how that happened, it wasnt supposed to. People knowing who I am when I've never met them before is a tad bit disconcerting.

But yeah, that's what it is.

Downside: I CANT STOP DOING IT.

That's how I process stuff 24/7. It's one of the core reasons why I have no patience... because everything is bloody slow as dirt to me. AND, while I can focus on a huge number of things at once, I *cannot* "condense" that focus. So, I cant just focus on one simple task or something. If there's not enough to process, I space out, as that focus all turns inward, towards whatever screwy thing I'm then imagining. So, in class, or in any job, I'd be spaced out 99% of the time, because not enough stuff was happening. I also dont do well with activities that involve just sitting and watching stuff. Like, sure... try to watch a movie, okay. But if 90% of my mind is still looking for other stuff to latch onto, and there isnt anything, well... yeah, I'll space out, and heck with the rest of the movie.

So, this is an "ability" that's fantastically useful in video games, also useful in driving.... outright detrimental in class, or any sort of job, or social situations, or.... other things.

Also my memory is really, REALLY bad. That's my other major problem. I often say, I have a memory like a cheese grater. AKA, full of holes.

Combine "frequently spaced out" with "cheese grater memory" and you have someone who sometimes tries to do things like make a sandwich but forget the bread (yes, really).


So that's my "I'm really good at THIS, but then THIS happens" story.

One thing that I reference a lot in my head is the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). People who test as sensing and perceiving (like ISTP or ESFP) are supposed to process external information through extroverted sensing or something, and people who test like this are supposed to be more common among race car drivers since extroverted sensing works well with race car driving

I don’t know if any of this is true or not, but just what my head is going to with things you say

Like, I think savants have kind of been kind seen as a key to how the brain works

Like, in my head, my hypothesis is that whatever humans do which allows them to see the external world and react to it, you absolutely excel at. And I don’t know why. But, legitimately, your brain could work differently where whatever allows people to see faced paced computer things and then react to them might just be easier for you than it is for other people.

Like my initial guess is that certain brain structures are either overdeveloped, or there is an underdevelopment of executive function brain structures getting in the way of allowing you to perceive the external world and react to it

Like, back to me, this is really what I am thinking in reaction to your writing, where I suspect that other people might be thinking like things along lines of “that is a pretty damn badass thing to be good at” (which I also thought too)
 
Not really sure what l am good at. But l am extremely great at feeling insecure. But l am good at trying new things. Think l am great at flip flopping - yes l can do this, oh no l can't. But it's internal struggle, probably a neurotic struggle that comes out in my writing and so on. But l bring passion, that's it! I am great at bringing passion to what l am doing.

I have read things that you say and have said and you are a kind hearted person

Like, take the computer or phone or iPad or whatever you are writing from, you can’t do what it is doing, nobody can.

So it isn’t exactly processing power that makes people smart or computers smart, it’s the way in which it’s used, like as a computer program or algorithm or something. And things like you were saying in the 911 thread are actually very, very complicated reasoning processes which your computer cannot do. Feeling sympathy and making a decision about what’s right as opposed to what someone wants and on and on are things that a chain of supercomputers cannot do very well

-

Back to me, I kind of get that savant syndrome or just autism in general might be sort of the key to unlocking how the brain works and so on, so I am now wanting to research endless studies and research state of things with brain imaging and so on to try to solve why the brain works like it does. And I do think that I can pretty quickly jump over experts heads with such things. But the thing is that this is just all that I do and the only thing that I am good at, I still haven’t taken a shower or taken the trash out or cleaned up and on and on because I don’t find doing these things to be particularly interesting. It is like it is both a blessing and a curse. But just kind of trying to put a positive spin on things and asking people what they might be good at since if the explanation for autism is actually brains being just wired differently, there has to be positives
 
As a kid, my only discussions were about explaining to others what happened in the classroom and what they had to do. Except from being in the same classroom and having 2 arms and legs, we had nothing in common. As soon as we were out of the classroom, I was desesperatly alone. I didn't know how to laugh, how to play, how to communicate about other stuffs than "why there might be stars in the sky", which was interesting no one because... well, obviously we just had nothing in common. I was spending my time in "my world", stimming visually about lights, movements, etc. I also was in total overwhelm because of the noise so I couldn't act. I didn't know I had to observe and copy (others were just a complete mystery), so I was isolated.

What you have that's VERY positive in you, you've got somehow to pay it in other areas. No one is a superhero. Your brain won't make it all happen. I have a view in my mind in which some people are balanced, kind of in the middle, others have "imbalances". You can't be good at something and not pay it in other areas. Basically, your attention can't be everywhere.
For example, a teacher in primary school noted that I was "very good at arts". She also noted that I was "still having reveries". You basically can't be good at art without "dreaming" - in other words, I was autistic, paying attention to the details around me rather than on the "main action" according to others. This is exactly what makes me good at arts. This is also a way of processing information that made me good at school. I wasn't taken by the "main actions" nor by "sociality". I was focused. That makes me gain somewhere, and loose in other areas. Having those visual capacities also litteraly saved my brother from death, because I saw signs in his health that no one could see. I was right. My "reveries" can look useless for the outside world, they aren't at all. Who knows how your particularities will serve?

Your brain can't do everything. And you don't really get to choose how it functions. When it's a bit/a lot imbalanced, it has very good points, and others that are more difficult. It's normal. The majority of people might be more balanced, they don't have your abilities in other areas. The brain just can't be very good at something and functionning in a certain way - in order to be good in that thing - AND still keep everything in the other areas. You pay your qualities, all people with good abilities in something aren't that good in others. It's not bad if you manage to put yourself in the right place for you.

I also have coordination issues, I don't know where is my left and my right, I'm bad at socializing (I socialize but I know my relationships are always weird compared to what others have between them), I'm very bad at dancing, and so on.
I'm very good at meticulous activities which recquiere focus and patience. I'm also good at making connections and associations in my mind just as you describe - althrough I struggle to recall the precise facts such as dates or names.
I'm better at art than other people. I'm better at photography than most people. etc. That's just because of the way I focus on reality in general, how I see things in general. It's just an ability, just as other people have the ability to know how to be spontanuous and improvise. I can't improvise well, I don't have the capacity to do so; because I process reality in a way that's making me good at other stuffs. I'm learning to start liking and enjoying it at the moment :)
 
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When I was young, I had a truly prodigious skill. No one taught me. I did not know how I knew how to do it. I was not diagnosed and bullied and all that, etc. long story short......I could not do anything with it. Co-morbidities also interfered with my ability to use it. That could have been overcome with early intervention. But it wasn't.

There are a few things I do excel at and do better than average, but define average. I do think there are a few things I really do better at than most.

But OVERALL I am the exact opposite of what you asked. I do most things below and worse than average.

Again, define average. In some situations, my most pronounced lack would still be light years ahead. Average is even disputable by regional differences.
 
As a kid, my only discussions were about explaining to others what happened in the classroom and what they had to do. Except from being in the same classroom and having 2 arms and legs, we had nothing in common. As soon as we were out of the classroom, I was desesperatly alone. I didn't know how to laugh, how to play, how to communicate about other stuffs than "why there might be stars in the sky", which was interesting no one because... well, obviously we just had nothing in common. I was spending my time in "my world", stimming visually about lights, movements, etc. I also was in total overwhelm because of the noise so I couldn't act. I didn't know I had to observe and copy (others were just a complete mystery), so I was isolated.

What you have that's VERY positive in you, you've got somehow to pay it in other areas. No one is a superhero. Your brain won't make it all happen. I have a view in my mind in which some people are balanced, kind of in the middle, others have "imbalances". You can't be good at something and not pay it in other areas. Basically, your attention can't be everywhere.
For example, a teacher in primary school noted that I was "very good at arts". She also noted that I was "still having reveries". You basically can't be good at art without "dreaming" - in other words, I was autistic, paying attention to the details around me rather than on the "main action" according to others. This is exactly what makes me good at arts. This is also a way of processing information that made me good at school. I wasn't taken by the "main actions" nor by "sociality". I was focused. That makes me gain somewhere, and loose in other areas. Having those visual capacities also litteraly saved my brother from death, because I saw signs in his health that no one could see. I was right. My "reveries" can look useless for the outside world, they aren't at all. Who knows how your particularities will serve?

Your brain can't do everything. And you don't really get to choose how it functions. When it's a bit/a lot imbalanced, it has very good points, and others that are more difficult. It's normal. The majority of people might be more balanced, they don't have your abilities in other areas. The brain just can't be very good at something and functionning in a certain way - in order to be good in that thing - AND still keep everything in the other areas. You pay your qualities, all people with good abilities in something aren't that good in others. It's not bad if you manage to put yourself in the right place for you.

I also have coordination issues, I don't know where is my left and my right, I'm bad at socializing (I socialize but I know my relationships are always weird compared to what others have between them), I'm very bad at dancing, and so on.
I'm very good at meticulous activities which recquiere focus and patience. I'm also good at making connections and associations in my mind just as you describe - althrough I struggle to recall the precise facts such as dates or names.
I'm better at art than other people. I'm better at photography than most people. etc. That's just because of the way I focus on reality in general, how I see things in general. It's just an ability, just as other people have the ability to know how to be spontanuous and improvise. I can't improvise well, I don't have the capacity to do so; because I process reality in a way that's making me good at other stuffs. I'm learning to start liking and enjoying it at the moment :)

I really like what you wrote, it was very well thought out and informative

I guess what frustrates me is since people can kind of just be in awe of me about what I can do in certain things, they develop this idea that “Joe is smart”, so if I am not good at normal things, it’s because of things terrible about me or my laziness or whatever else. But people never grasp that because I am smart at one thing, does not mean that I am smart at everything.

I used to be involved in bodybuilding, and most likely because I am just naturally muscular, but what I noticed it is not the ultra skinny weaklings, who are the people who actually should try to become more muscular rarely have the courage to show up at gyms and better themselves, it's the the peop,e who start out as muscular who go to gyms to just become more muscular

Like I walked in the gym at 18 and could immediately bench press 165 lbs. It was pretty fun and helped with my self confidence to turn being a mildly natural freak into a bodybuilding freak. But in a way it just was not healthy, I still had not the slightest clue of how to talk to girls or even how to make friends.

Like I think that that what adult humans do is get so ridiculously good at one thing, so that they can hide behind that thing, or actually address all their weaknesses while still aknowledgimg their strengths to become well formed human adults, but the damn thing about autism spectrum is people might just be so in one direction that all there is in one side with extreme strengths and another side with extreme weaknesses so and turning oneself from a 100 lb weakling to a 130 lb weakling just ain't fun, especially when you are like struggling to bench press135 lbs and freaks who naturally excel are trying to get to bench pressing 415 lbs

But it's also weird, hard core bodybuildesr see this scrawny ass weakling trying to get to bench pressing something they could've always done naturally see this guy showing up every day to become a better version of himself and these muscular bodybuilders become in awe of the guys courage and no one has more cheerleaders than scrawny wimp trying to get up to bench pressing 200 lbs. possibly because these bodybuilders recognize that guy is killing himself to get better at something in which he sucks at takes lot of guts and courage

Or something, I just write what occurs to me a lot of the time
 
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When I was young, I had a truly prodigious skill. No one taught me. I did not know how I knew how to do it. I was not diagnosed and bullied and all that, etc. long story short......I could not do anything with it. Co-morbidities also interfered with my ability to use it. That could have been overcome with early intervention. But it wasn't.

There are a few things I do excel at and do better than average, but define average. I do think there are a few things I really do better at than most.

But OVERALL I am the exact opposite of what you asked. I do most things below and worse than average.

Again, define average. In some situations, my most pronounced lack would still be light years ahead. Average is even disputable by regional differences.

Like, I guess that my baseline is something along the lines of what can you do which your computer cannot do without some ultra sophisticated programming or something in which you just are good at things in which other people people tend to not to be very good at?

Like my entire existence is about people assuming that I can do normal things which I cannot do, so I get this part of the problem

But like my question might be like along the lines of what thing are you so good at. Like it can be completely emotional or supportive and so on, it doesn't have to be logical

This is not a crazy or irrational question. You can't figure out the square root of 2765546633 in .00001 seconds, but your computer can. But your computer cannot do almost anything that you can do

I guess that I feel like I am sounding condescending, but that isn't my point. It's just like I keep keep reading that high functioning autistics brains are just wired differently, but, if this is true, the next question becomes "just how are they wired differently?" If they process certain things better and other things worse, then exactly what are all the positives?
 
I taught myself to draw pretty well, and I was a very good musician and taught myself a good amount of piano. I had a very good ear for music. That coupled with the fact that I can memorize the chords that I see people play on piano. It kind of feels like I'm doing math. Like entering a code into the piano. I haven't played in so long but it was one of my favorite hobbys.
 
Interesting topic!

When I’m really interested in a subject, I can have a really intense focus on it. I can read pages and pages of textbooks if it’s about history or psychology, and then I can remember all of the facts I learned through that first reading. I can also focus for hours when drawing, or cleaning/fixing a typewriter. I also really love to play Tetris, and can play for hours at a time.

The downside is that this focus doesn’t work if I don’t have an interest in the subject. If I can’t do what I expect myself to be able to do, then I get really frustrated and impatient. I always had a hard time with physics, and I became very frustrated whenever I couldn’t figure out the solution.

Whenever I have to write something formal, like an essay or email, I can sort of ‘fake’ a good piece of writing. I can bang out a full essay within a few hours, even though I would never actually talk like that anywhere else. I think that I almost ‘mask’ my writing style to imitate other pieces of writing like textbooks, novels, etc. People who have read my past school work have said that it sounds more like a textbook than a student’s actual writing. I think this has some pros and cons, it makes my work seem more professional, but also kind of impersonal.

It sounds a little bit like your main issue is just your head turns on or off whether you are interested or not, but I am not sure

Like if you have to talk about the history and psychology of Tetris compared to if you have to write about physics or something
 

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