Do people like us think we have alone even though we do.

[Tony Ramirez]

I think that way throughout all the years of not having any friends. I made friends last year coming back to the Church. Some I am very close to and some know what I have. I also made a couple of girls as friends.

My question is that in your mind I think I am still alone with no friends. I guess in High School and much worse College I really had no friends so I still think that way.

 

[Fino]

I think there are some typos in your question, I can't quite make sense of the title. My guess is that you're saying you still think of yourself as having no friends even when you do because you're used to not having friends.

 

[Thinx]

I just wonder if the nonfiring of synapses/lack of connectors in our brains or whatever, does facilitate that internal feeling, whereas for NTs there's a more, joined up feeling of permanent connection to others?

I see how we are as a different way of being, though, not necessarily problematic, so, for example, you do have people in your life now, and you achieved that by being proactive, so you now know how to get friends, so maybe the issue is to see the difference between your independent mindset, and feeling lonely?

So you can be happy in yourself when alone, because you have friends, but are sometimes alone, rather than lonely?

 

[Ezra]

It is common for people with autism to feel alone even when they have friends.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

I have some problems with self esteem issues which make me periodically question whether my friends really like me or just tolerate my presence because they're kind...

 

[SusanLR]

It is common for people with autism to feel alone even when they have friends

Exactly.
That's the worst part of it for me.
I always feel alone. No matter who I am with.
Can't seem to change that feeling of not being able to connect.

 

[unperson]

Always feel so different, although I used to enjoy company, they tend to take the high road after they realise I'm not uh one of them.

 

[Judge]

Let's put it this way. In my own case, I've always had a sense of "being on the outside, looking in".

A feeling that I've never been able to shake all my life. No matter how many people were in my social orbit.

 

[Aspychata]

One thing l read that still echos in my head:
I can chose to be alone or l can chose to be lonely.

It's spin on words but it does feel authentic and l value the meaning.

 

[Mia]

Used to have these dreams for years, walking through rooms where I saw people that I knew as friends. Each room would be filled with people from different eras, childhood, teenage years and then adulthood. I could see them, but I was invisible.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Thanks. So it's not just me. I guess that is why even with peers growing up who use to talk to me I use to make things up like TV stations/radio

Gonna get weird here so I will quote it.

Channel 75 in junior high, IR-C in high school, then IR and IR Radio in College after dropping out which is still in my imagination today IR Radio listen to Drone Zone, Chillhop on YouTube 10pm-12am, iHeart Halloween October 27th till November 1st. Soma FM Christmas lounge Christmas week.

Otherwise often I feel like "being on the outside, looking in" even when I am with my Church friends. I guess it's from past experiences when I use to sit near people who were friends among themselves and I was ignored.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Just now I felt depressed having an argument with my famikyabout the pandemic and texted someone from Church group and she called me back we talked for about a half hour. So I know I am not alone but at least I know it's a ASD trait that I do feel like I am.

 

[Misery]

It can also depend on how we see people as a whole.

I tend to have a similar feeling as you (every now and then, anyway), but at the same time, I tend to think of most people as.... slime. I cant think of a better way to put that. Just slime. I've seen too much bad/stupid from too many idiots over too many years (and I used to work retail, way back when... enough said, right?). Eventually I didnt even bother trying to find friends. Why would I? An answer to that question never appears. I only have one friend that I actually know in person, and likely that number will never increase.

Oddly this has actually been somewhat helpful through the pandemic situation.... because I wouldnt be out there interacting with anyone in the first place, so nothing is really missing.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

Out of all the places to make friends High School actually great place to make enemies bullies.

College was my worst experience really bad but I was so antisocial I use to run away especially from girls.

At work just a few acquaintances you say high too.

Now not to be preaching about Christianity but a good Christian Church is the best place to make friends. Join some groups there. They never judged me or say bad things to me. They are actually helping me through these lonely Covid times where there no more smiles and bad news in the media.