Chat Apps

[Skittlebisquit]

I really really like texting, do you want to know why? It's because I have trouble speaking sometimes. My phone will let me talk to it and it types for me. That I can do, because I can see it, and take my time.

I can type on my phone ok, but it's so weird! I used to be able to type accurate 35wpm but it's been 10 years since I could do that. I only have the phone for internet.

I am so confused and would like some advice, please. It's a tangled ball of etiquette, cyber security, and technical capability.

I have been inviting ppl from this site to meet me on discord. I think that's not ok, because few have agreed. Is it they think I am hitting on them? I have my own server, there are like four of us on it, it's free too. And everyone is nice. That's why i like it.

I am actually a luddite. Do you know what that is? It means I am not technically literate, at least not anymore, for spiritual reasons, I disdain most modern technology.

Does anyone remember ICQ? I used to do that and Yahoo messenger too. I stopped using online PC in 2009 after I got all fat and sick(heartache).

I am a legacy man, I have 9 working computers going from a wingback Dell with WIN XP all the way back to a genuine IBM PC XT with a 386mhz processor (1987) I had to stop using online services because I got addicted to it.

I am scared of Facebook, it could be a delusion not sure. Facebook is said to collect and sell data, I don't even really know what that means. Does that even matter?

Facebook has a chat app called 'what's app"
'What's app's apparently has Similar functionality as discord, which has; text chat and you can send pretty pics,( I have baby geese soon!) discord lets you live call and with video one way! I talked to my friend in eastern Europe, it was free! I took her for a tour of the woods in early spring ( she likes flowers), she could hear me and I could hear her and she could see out of my phone. so satisfying to be able to share like that. Like having a real friend to talk to.

Is it a political thing? Like ppl only use one kind and I have the wrong app? Is discord dangerous? One young man I know is super smart and he uses it. Is it rude somehow to invite ppl off this platform? Does that make ppl think I am hitting on them?!?!?

[I am totally saving myself for a proper pagan warrior woman, who can ride, shoot a bow, and has her own actual spear and shield and knows the Highland ways, and Auld Kine too]

I like the discord platform better for conversation that's all. Its two way and it is faster than posting to threads or sending PM. I don't want to break the rules here, or be rude to people or make people feel wierd. My friend says to give out my discord ID, just like I would my phone number, instead of sending the invite, I guess it's safer [to me?]

I am older and not especially well and cannot drive well or go very far alone. I know very few people well, mostly neighbors and church people, sorry that sounds whiny.

I would very much appreciate any advice you may have on this matter. Today I am able to walk, but i am using a cane again sometimes. I will use a different chat app if there is a better one. I just want to make some more friends, I sit around alot. The chat app is more dynamic. I still like posting here and reading the forums, this place has been a great blessing to me.

If you direct message me I will write you back.
Thank you

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Here is one of my new animal friends, ghrmdrin. From just the other day.

 

[Bert22]

Excuse the brevity of this response:

Discord is safe
Chatting online isn't like it used to be, nowadays people use social media such as WhatsApp and Facebook as they allow you to create groups. Only places like this (specialist interest forums) tend to have open discussion, general socialising on chat rooms or apps tends to be quite romance focused (substitute romance for any other sex related thing lol). So if you start inviting people to join your own chat, they will likely think you are hitting on them, or just as likely trying to make money or scam them by getting them to go elsewhere, click on links, etc.
The random chat apps are even worse for this.

I miss the nineties. You could always find interesting chat with strangers online. Now its only found when you already have a common interest.

OK less brief than I planned!

 

[Bert22]

Your best bet for easy interaction is probably Facebook, as you can easily search for groups on topics that interest you.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Thanks Bert

 

[Gift2humanity]

I really really like texting, do you want to know why? It's because I have trouble speaking sometimes. My phone will let me talk to it and it types for me. That I can do, because I can see it, and take my time.

I can type on my phone ok, but it's so weird! I used to be able to type accurate 35wpm but it's been 10 years since I could do that. I only have the phone for internet.

I am so confused and would like some advice, please. It's a tangled ball of etiquette, cyber security, and technical capability.

I have been inviting ppl from this site to meet me on discord. I think that's not ok, because few have agreed. Is it they think I am hitting on them? I have my own server, there are like four of us on it, it's free too. And everyone is nice. That's why i like it.

I am actually a luddite. Do you know what that is? It means I am not technically literate, at least not anymore, for spiritual reasons, I disdain most modern technology.

Does anyone remember ICQ? I used to do that and Yahoo messenger too. I stopped using online PC in 2009 after I got all fat and sick(heartache).

I am a legacy man, I have 9 working computers going from a wingback Dell with WIN XP all the way back to a genuine IBM PC XT with a 386mhz processor (1987) I had to stop using online services because I got addicted to it.

I am scared of Facebook, it could be a delusion not sure. Facebook is said to collect and sell data, I don't even really know what that means. Does that even matter?

Facebook has a chat app called 'what's app"
'What's app's apparently has Similar functionality as discord, which has; text chat and you can send pretty pics,( I have baby geese soon!) discord lets you live call and with video one way! I talked to my friend in eastern Europe, it was free! I took her for a tour of the woods in early spring ( she likes flowers), she could hear me and I could hear her and she could see out of my phone. so satisfying to be able to share like that. Like having a real friend to talk to.

Is it a political thing? Like ppl only use one kind and I have the wrong app? Is discord dangerous? One young man I know is super smart and he uses it. Is it rude somehow to invite ppl off this platform? Does that make ppl think I am hitting on them?!?!?

[I am totally saving myself for a proper pagan warrior woman, who can ride, shoot a bow, and has her own actual spear and shield and knows the Highland ways, and Auld Kine too]

I like the discord platform better for conversation that's all. Its two way and it is faster than posting to threads or sending PM. I don't want to break the rules here, or be rude to people or make people feel wierd. My friend says to give out my discord ID, just like I would my phone number, instead of sending the invite, I guess it's safer [to me?]

I am older and not especially well and cannot drive well or go very far alone. I know very few people well, mostly neighbors and church people, sorry that sounds whiny.

I would very much appreciate any advice you may have on this matter. Today I am able to walk, but i am using a cane again sometimes. I will use a different chat app if there is a better one. I just want to make some more friends, I sit around alot. The chat app is more dynamic. I still like posting here and reading the forums, this place has been a great blessing to me.

If you direct message me I will write you back.
Thank youView attachment 67998

Speech to text is ok so long as your device does not misunderstand your pronunciation and make mistakes.

Verbal can be too immediate, yet text has it's own problems too, you don't get the tone of voice, the facial expressions etc.

I joined NAS forum, I don't use it, I tried to install discord, but it went wrong.

I can only speak for myself, chatting in real time can be ok if it's light hearted but if it's serious talk it can be too immediate for me.

I used to be paranoid about being watched but in this day and age, let them watch is what I say.
What will be will be.
Obviously don't publicise bank details or any information you wouldn't want public.

I installed instagram but can't get the hang of it for some reason, also I had to start a new account with a different email because it contradicted itself saying it didn't have my email, and something like it did.

I'm sorry I cannot answer your app question, I have some apps but not many. I use FB messenger. I have signal but don't use it so much now, its secure. I have WhatsApp, don't seem to use that much.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

They're all big brother at this point. Even mewe and parler were controlled by big tech. I wouldn't be surprised if even this place was.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

I didn't have any email or facebook until a year or two ago when I was diagnosed with cancer, and became bedridden, so that I could keep in touch with friends and family and the outside world, and not feel so lonely.

 

[Misery]

Okay, I have a few things to say about this. As context, I've been doing this sort of thing for... too long. Far too long. I got started with AOL (America Online) in the days when modems screamed bloody murder every time you tried to connect, and it took like 5 squillionty years to download a simple photo of a cat. The use of AIM (AOL Instant Messanger) came almost immediately after signing up for AOL. This was... oh it had to be at least 20 years ago. Probably 25... ugh.

Yeah. A lot of experience.

I'm also self-taught in terms of computer/tech use, learned back in the ancient days of DOS.

So yeah, that's where I come from with answers to this sort of thing.

I'm going to quote some of the things directly:

I have been inviting ppl from this site to meet me on discord. I think that's not ok, because few have agreed. Is it they think I am hitting on them? I have my own server, there are like four of us on it, it's free too. And everyone is nice. That's why i like it.

It's okay, really. The issue for some is that it is something they may not understand the use/purpose of. I've gotten that response a few times from people on this forum, if I mention things like the use of Discord or Steam for direct discussion. That just confused lack of understanding. And it makes sense, really... this is an autism forum, and those are communication programs.

Others may simply not be much into computer use, and things like that. Tech in general, even. Still others may already have a "comfortable space" online that they already use, and may not like the idea of adding/changing.

There's no harm in inviting someone to a direct discussion thing like Discord or whatever. Just be ready for the potential rejection there, particularly in a place where people often just have difficulty communicating to begin with.

I am scared of Facebook, it could be a delusion not sure. Facebook is said to collect and sell data, I don't even really know what that means. Does that even matter?

Oh yes, it matters. And it's rather devious. Theoretically this data is used to make it easier to advertise at you (as if big companies even think about anything else). But the fact that they HAVE the data can be a problem... particularly if there is a security breach. The fact that they outright SELL said data to companies who could be up to who knows what is even worse.

What data are they collecting? Everything, anything. Oh, they wont go after things like credit card numbers or anything... that'd be all sorts of illegal and if found out, the damage to the company and those running it would be immediate and devastating. But plenty of other things get collected. For instance, and this is the bit that bothers many the most, they will essentially follow you online. Watching and recording the things you click on, the sites you frequent and how often/long you use them, things like that. If you've ever wondered why you might look at, say, a pair of shoes in an online store just for the heck of it, and then for the next couple weeks afterwards the entire bloody Net seems to be trying to get you to buy more shoes... that's how and why that happens.

There are certainly other aspects to this, but I think you get the picture. People worry... rightfully... that some very personal stuff could end up in the hands of some frozen-hearted corporation.

Facebook is, frankly, very dangerous. I always warn people to stay entirely away from both that and Twitter. People think they're safe. Somehow, the Net as a whole has trained them to think this way. Even to the point of using their real names on sites like that! Which is a HUGE no-no by the way. Internet safety rule #1: Dont. Use. Your. Real name. PERIOD. There was a time when the whole Net understood this... somehow that has changed, and few seem to grasp this rule or why it is important.

That's not the only reason why that site and those like it are dangerous... but I'll not go into that here. I'll put it this way: it's one deep rabbit hole.

I strongly suggest entirely avoiding it. Dont even make an account.

Is it a political thing? Like ppl only use one kind and I have the wrong app?

It's merely a matter of preference and familiarity. And certain programs may be particularly attractive to certain groups. Discord for instance is most used by/for gamers, with a rather extreme number of gaming related servers, as well as their own online vendor for games. Gamers will usually hear about Discord quickly; other groups may not learn of it at all as it has less chance of appearing in their circles.

Also it can be an absolute pain to have multiple accounts across multiple programs. 'Tis a recipe for madness, I tell you.

Is discord dangerous?

Oh yes. They all are. ALL of them.

I want to be very clear here: There is no such place as a truly safe space/program/site/anything on the Net. Again, people have this idea that everything is oh so safe these days... just install a virus scanner on your PC and you'll never have a problem! The direct opposite is true. The Net as a whole has been dangerous from day one, and continues to only get moreso as time goes on.

Sometimes the dangers can involve smaller things, like common jerks throwing viruses at you because they think it's funny. But other times... well, you dont want to know. And I'm not going to explain. All I'll say is, I've explored deep. Curiosity of a cat, always have had that. And if you truly explore deep into the Net... the layers most never see and perhaps CANT see... you'll see things you really, REALLY wish you could unsee. Even with my godawful memory, some things... seen as long as a decade ago... remain crystal clear in memory. A couple come to mind as I type this. Yeah... you dont want to know.

Just know that, much like a major city, there can be places that are good (yet still accessible by criminals), places that are rather seedy and suspicious... and places that qualify as "underground", where horrific things happen. In other words... just like real life in a crowded area. That's a good way to think of the Net. Except that the Net is almost impossible to police. It is simply too chaotic.

So yeah: These things are never safe. Dont get me wrong: Discord itself is not at all malicious. But those who go there CAN be. That's the case everywhere. And of course some programs ARE malicious... never forget that. If you're not tech-savvy, you have even more reason to take precaution. I can deal with many things well because of sheer experience and knowledge, but anyone without tech experience will be nearly defenseless in many situations.

It's always potentially dangerous, like a big city. Never forget that.

If you ever have questions or concerns, feel free to ask people around you about it. The best way to stay safe is to LEARN. Heck, ask me if you'd like. Not that I know everything, mind you. The Net is huge. Also again, dont use your real name anywhere, seriously. Frankly the made-up names online are more fun/interesting anyway, and more expressive.

My friend says to give out my discord ID, just like I would my phone number, instead of sending the invite, I guess it's safer [to me?]

Not necessarily, but there's nothing wrong with that approach. Just remember the stuff above. And dont post it in super public places. I've seen people drop Discord/whatever IDs in places like freaking Twitter and such, that's just asking for some snotrag troll to come at you. Make sure you're comfortable with the people you're dealing with BEFORE sending them something like that. Just like how you wouldnt give your actual phone number to some random doofus in the park.



So, yeah, that's that. Again, based on FAR too much experience.

Feel free to ask any questions you may have or even message me directly about whatever.

 

[Au Naturel]

I would not want to live much of my life through social media. This forum is good for an hour on some days and other days I don't even go here. I have a couple of other places I go, there's reddit, which is probably good for a half-hour. Facebook is just for keeping up with a half dozen close friends and family. Maybe 15 minutes on twitter. Intentionally avoid any kind of chat environment.

I am retired, so theoretically I could spend the entire day on it. Some people do.

I have two WordPress blogs and a Naturism Connection newsletter I write for that account for the vast bulk of my social media. A single blog post usually takes hours and may take days to complete. But them most people would not consider long-form blogging (1000+ words and/or multiple photos illustrating a story) to be "real" social media. The kind that addicts you to constant little pings of dopamine.

Social media can become addicting and contains so much toxicity I would never recommend anyone get involved with it as a primary social experience.

 

[Judge]

Blast from the past. I used to use IRC a lot years ago. Though it seems these days while it's still technically around that it's "dead". From a security standpoint it left many users vulnerable with certain ports open.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Thank you all so much, that's all fantastic. I feel a bit like some barefoot primitive savage at the carwash, looking for where to put the quarters at. It's just so much easier for me to text back an forth, full duplex. I like discord! It reminds me of ICQ, and a better version of the old messenger programs. I' am so glad to be vindicated for my concern about face book apps, and other ones too. Texting I prefer over speaking , certainly. I cannot talk live, at least not well, I sound like a stuttering doofus.

 

[watersprite]

Stuttering is NOT synomynous with doofus.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Maybe not but I feel like a fool just the same. Dang

I just cant talk well sometimes. But I can write, just fine. Always

 

[watersprite]

Stuttering is a disability I am intimately familiar with and I disagree in the strongest terms equating a speech disability with such a derogatory term. Wrong on all counts.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

Ok I apologize if I offended you. I said about what I feel like though. I will use better words, please forgive me

 

[watersprite]

Of course. Forgive me for getting hot under the collar.
My dials are not calibrated finely.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

You have a right to demand respect

 

[watersprite]

As do you. We can listen to each other with patience and real interest. Sometimes it’s a lot of work on the parts of all concerned. There’s too mich loneliness in this old world and a huge lack of connection.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

As do you. We can listen to each other with patience and real interest. Sometimes it’s a lot of work on the parts of all concerned. There’s too mich loneliness in this old world and a huge lack of connection.

This is why I wish learn modern ways, to facilitate greater communication. So if I (sometimes) cannot seem to speak well enough to be understood, I wish to learn the text app technology, so I can type instead