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Catastrophising; it's all going to go wrong and everything will be ruined.

Full Steam

Full Steam

The renegade master
V.I.P Member
Do you suffer from this kind of thing?

I woke up in the middle of last night thinking about a house I may rent that I'm going to see this week. I like the pictures, and it's a nice house.

But, what if the neighbours are noisy? Some people run "party houses" around here and play loud music outside every weekend.

That would drive me crazy.

Maybe i could drive past on Friday night. And Saturday night.

It's half an hour away, so maybe I'd be better parking my car and wait around for an hour or two.

But my wife needs help with the kids.

Could I leave an old smart phone attached to a post so I can record the noise? Yes, but my old phone battery doesn't last long, and maybe that's a bit dodgy too. Webcam? No power source or disk or transmitter.

STOP!!

It's a nice house.

But what about the neighbours, this is really important...


And on and on for an hour at least, followed by dreams of horrible houses.


The only thing that seems to help is realising I can't control this and it's not really ME, just my brain looping.
 
Last edited:
Yes, all the time and usually about stuff that will never actually happen. My mind likes to always think of every possible terrible scenario.
 
Maybe you can just go knock on their door and try to meet them? Idk party houses are annoying and just because it's not one now doesn't mean they won't move and your new neighbors will be annoying.

I had the place next too me was a party housr for a long time or something I'm not quite sure as I was never over there. There was never the same vehicles parked outside multiple people stayed there at different times but nobody seemed to live there all the time. And the dudes would always being staring at me... >:

Finally it got sold again and some family lived there for a while but they had this creepy kid that was obsessed with babies and would always be watching us then telling us what she saw us doing. So creepy. They moved after about 2 years now some other chick lives there with a dude and her son and she just had another baby. Wouldn't mind them if it wasn't for their big stupid dog that they refuse to leash. And had on more than one occasion ran into our yard growling at me and my son. Once her stupid nasty dog took some huge **** right in my yard, I took the shovel and dropped it right on her sidewalk right in front of her and told her to keep her f***ing dog out of my yard.

My other neighbors on the other side and across from me I've had nothing but problems with expect the one old couple. One chick heckled me, the kids across the street have robbed me right out of my yard, and the other kids across the street ar mean too my son. :( :( :(

It's never anything like they show you on TV with neighbors and neighborhoods.

Neighbors suck. A house in the country with no neighbors would be ideal. :/

Where do you live currently, do you not have neighbors?
 
It's good that you're thinking out all the eventualities. You can ask some of the neighbors about the neighborhood. I wouldn't call that obsessive.
 
Full Steam said:
Do you suffer from this kind of thing?

I woke up in the middle of last night thinking about a house I may rent that I'm going to see this week. I like the pictures, and it's a nice house.

But, what if the neighbours are noisy? Some people run "party houses" around here and play loud music outside every weekend.

That would drive me crazy.

Maybe i could drive past on Friday night. And Saturday night.

It's half an hour away, so maybe I'd be better parking my car and wait around for an hour or two.

But my wife needs help with the kids.

Could I leave an old smart phone attached to a post so I can record the noise? Yes, but my old phone battery doesn't last long, and maybe that's a bit dodgy too. Webcam? No power source or disk or transmitter.

STOP!!

It's a nice house.

But what about the neighbours, this is really important...


And on and on for an hour at least, followed by dreams of horrible houses.


The only thing that seems to help is realising I can't control this and it's not really ME, just my brain looping.
Click to expand...

Suffer from it? I prefer to think that I excel at it.
 
Questella said:
Maybe you can just go knock on their door and try to meet them? Idk party houses are annoying and just because it's not one now doesn't mean they won't move and your new neighbors will be annoying.

I had the place next too me was a party housr for a long time or something I'm not quite sure as I was never over there. There was never the same vehicles parked outside multiple people stayed there at different times but nobody seemed to live there all the time. And the dudes would always being staring at me... >:

Finally it got sold again and some family lived there for a while but they had this creepy kid that was obsessed with babies and would always be watching us then telling us what she saw us doing. So creepy. They moved after about 2 years now some other chick lives there with a dude and her son and she just had another baby. Wouldn't mind them if it wasn't for their big stupid dog that they refuse to leash. And had on more than one occasion ran into our yard growling at me and my son. Once her stupid nasty dog took some huge **** right in my yard, I took the shovel and dropped it right on her sidewalk right in front of her and told her to keep her f***ing dog out of my yard.

My other neighbors on the other side and across from me I've had nothing but problems with expect the one old couple. One chick heckled me, the kids across the street have robbed me right out of my yard, and the other kids across the street ar mean too my son. :( :( :(

It's never anything like they show you on TV with neighbors and neighborhoods.

Neighbors suck. A house in the country with no neighbors would be ideal. :/

Where do you live currently, do you not have neighbors?
Click to expand...

I agree completely.

I live right now in an outer suburb that's very quiet, has security and locally "enforced" noise rules. Bush across the road, and very little noise from neighbours, but the house is going to be sold and I have to move.

The house I was referring to actually IS in the countryside, and I'm still stressing :D.

It has three neighbours within about 30m of the house - I'd rather it be 300m then I'd not worry about it:)

I know that sounds ridiculous compared with a housing estate, but it still worries me a bit. If we go for it I might actually try to meet the closest neighbour. Not a bad idea.
 
NeoPhile said:
It's good that you're thinking out all the eventualities. You can ask some of the neighbors about the neighborhood. I wouldn't call that obsessive.
Click to expand...

It's not just thinking things through though, and I do that for everything. It's the focus on the most catastrophic outcome and then circular thinking around that which just wears me out and builds stress and anxiety.

and 99% of the time everything's really OK.
 
I just remembered what set me off last night.

The house I'm thinking of renting was bought two months ago, and put on the rental market last week.

Maybe the new owners couldn't cope with the neighbours and party houses!

Or maybe that was always their plan, but it's not the ideal investment property.
 
Questella said:
Maybe you can just go knock on their door and try to meet them? Idk party houses are annoying and just because it's not one now doesn't mean they won't move and your new neighbors will be annoying.

I had the place next too me was a party housr for a long time or something I'm not quite sure as I was never over there. There was never the same vehicles parked outside multiple people stayed there at different times but nobody seemed to live there all the time. And the dudes would always being staring at me... >:

Finally it got sold again and some family lived there for a while but they had this creepy kid that was obsessed with babies and would always be watching us then telling us what she saw us doing. So creepy. They moved after about 2 years now some other chick lives there with a dude and her son and she just had another baby. Wouldn't mind them if it wasn't for their big stupid dog that they refuse to leash. And had on more than one occasion ran into our yard growling at me and my son. Once her stupid nasty dog took some huge **** right in my yard, I took the shovel and dropped it right on her sidewalk right in front of her and told her to keep her f***ing dog out of my yard.

My other neighbors on the other side and across from me I've had nothing but problems with expect the one old couple. One chick heckled me, the kids across the street have robbed me right out of my yard, and the other kids across the street ar mean too my son. :( :( :(

It's never anything like they show you on TV with neighbors and neighborhoods.

Neighbors suck. A house in the country with no neighbors would be ideal. :/

Where do you live currently, do you not have neighbors?
Click to expand...

Back to your problems - are you able to move to get away?
 
Full Steam said:
It's not just thinking things through though, and I do that for everything. It's the focus on the most catastrophic outcome and then circular thinking around that which just wears me out and builds stress and anxiety.

and 99% of the time everything's really OK.
Click to expand...
Well, you're considering the worst possible outcome. That's good because that means you can plan for it.
 
Questella said:
Haha no its seeming less likely everyday.

And the place is way too small for another kid. When I lived here by myself it seemed spacious... :(
Click to expand...

Have you another on the way or in mind?

I have three under 6.

Bigger houses help with sanity and noise containment, but they mean that they can spread the mess further and it's harder to keep tidy.

Our kids love moving house. My 5 year old has been asking to move for 6 months, and we've only been in this house 18 months.
 
Full Steam said:
Have you another on the way or in mind?

I have three under 6.

Bigger houses help with sanity and noise containment, but they mean that they can spread the mess further and it's harder to keep tidy.

Our kids love moving house. My 5 year old has been asking to move for 6 months, and we've only been in this house 18 months.
Click to expand...
No I just found out I was pregnant after having a tubal ligation. I'm super stressed about it I actually made a post about it in the serious discussion form I believe it was.

We have pets so owning a place is a must, I could never stand an apartment or renting from someone.
 
I do this too. Though less now that I am taking therapeutic levels of niacin. (I started a niacin therapy thread.)

On the one hand, it's sensible to process all available data and want more when making a big decision. On the other hand, you can't let your mind overstress about things you cannot control.

Because the thing about neighbors is, things can change in a short time. People move out, move in, have a kid, get a different job... that's something we can't predict.
 
Yes I'm guilty of this, I always think of the worst case scenario and it can also keep me awake at night,it drives my husband crazy because I get severe anxiety over it.
 
Full Steam said:
Do you suffer from this kind of thing?

I woke up in the middle of last night thinking about a house I may rent that I'm going to see this week. I like the pictures, and it's a nice house.

But, what if the neighbours are noisy? Some people run "party houses" around here and play loud music outside every weekend.

That would drive me crazy.

Maybe i could drive past on Friday night. And Saturday night.

It's half an hour away, so maybe I'd be better parking my car and wait around for an hour or two.

But my wife needs help with the kids.

Could I leave an old smart phone attached to a post so I can record the noise? Yes, but my old phone battery doesn't last long, and maybe that's a bit dodgy too. Webcam? No power source or disk or transmitter.

STOP!!

It's a nice house.

But what about the neighbours, this is really important...


And on and on for an hour at least, followed by dreams of horrible houses.


The only thing that seems to help is realising I can't control this and it's not really ME, just my brain looping.
Click to expand...
Maybe you could just go over in the daytime and ask some of the neighbors how they like the neighborhood and if there are any disturbances like that. You may be able to tell by talking to them if they are the kind of neighbors you would like. Also the local police might be able to tell you if they get called to that neighborhood. Another clue is how do the people keep their properties? Lawns mowed and houses neat? Best of luck to you!
 
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