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Can an autistic be charismatic?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Tord, Sep 14, 2021.

  1. Tord

    Tord New Member

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    Exactly as the title says. The human brain is an impressive thing, but is it impressive enough that it can make up for a complete lack of the intricate intuition necessary to not just socialize, but to socialize well? Or are we as autists doomed to always look pathetic, ostracized by the fact that our flickering microexpressions and the weird ways we move expose us on some level to NTs?
     
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  2. PastelPetals

    PastelPetals Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It depends how verbal you are and the prosody of your speech mostly. In real life I have trouble more than online but in some places my blunders were seen as cute. That comes with it's own set of issues and most people who liked me wanted me for more than friendship but it's possible. I also find that therapists find me charismatic since I am good at therapy (if you can even be good) I have done it for a long time and I know the rules. That's about where it ends for me to the point that friends I have had have told me they hated me till they got to know me. I am good for those who stick around I guess.
     
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  3. Suzette

    Suzette Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    A quick google search gave me the following list.
    Autistic Celebrities
    I think most if these people can be considered charismatic.
    Confirmed Examples
    Here we list examples of people who have confirmed that they are autistic or have an autism spectrum neurodivergence. We include only celebrities whose fame is not directly related to their autism advocacy (e.g. not Temple Grandin or John Elder Robison).

    Also
    Hannah Gatsby, autistic comedian from Australia. Comedy takes charisma!

     
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  4. BrokenBoy

    BrokenBoy 戯言使い(Nonsense User)

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    I am sometimes, but generally it feels like my disease basically forces me to things that only make stuff worse and I don't feel in control.
     
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  5. Thinx

    Thinx Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    That's a 'yes' then. (Based on @Suzette's post above). I'm not charismatic, though I can be quite amusing.
     
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  6. crewlucaa_

    crewlucaa_ New Member

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    I've been told that I'm charismatic, and also effervescent, approachable, personable, trustworthy, friendly, funny, cute, and sweet. I think it depends on the personality. I'm more extroverted than a lot of Autistic people (not meant in an offensive way at all). I think people tend to associate charisma with extroversion sometimes. I'm extremely talkative (for better or for worse!!) and I actually don't find conversations super difficult.
    But everyone's different!
    I think Suzette's list of celebrities is a great example of Autistic people who are charismatic, and some probably fairly outgoing as well. There are all different types of personalities and there's nothing wrong with that!! :blush::blush:
     
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  7. Crossbreed

    Crossbreed Neur-D Missionary ☝️ V.I.P Member

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    I have been in musical plays and I have proctored employment tests for the 2010 US Census. I can be publicly compelling if I have a script.

    When I worked help-desk or helped classmates, I didn't need a script, just a good grasp of the material. In that capacity, I didn't have to present information. I just had to field questions. (When fielding questions, it is okay to say, "I don't know," when necessary.)
     
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2021
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  8. Raggamuffin

    Raggamuffin Well-Known Member

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    ASD is a spectrum - as such there can't be a black and white answer to the question.

    I've been told by many that I am charismatic. But it's situational. If I'm around people I have nothing in common with, or don't like? Then I'll be mute - such as how I am in this job. Where I can go all week with a total of 5-10 mins of small talk with co-workers. But if I'm around friends and like minded individuals - you won't be able to shut me up.

    Ed
     
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  9. rach3rd

    rach3rd Member

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    I’m a situational extrovert and can lead discussions and such, but not charismatic.
     
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  10. WildCat

    WildCat V.I.P Member

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    I highly suggest you check out the pictures thread on this forum if you're going to make statements like that...

    https://www.autismforums.com/threads/post-a-photo-of-yourself-thread-round-2.838/

    ...unless I missed something here, if that was meant to be self-deprecating or your personal opinion, in which case carry on...
     
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2021
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  11. Magna

    Magna Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Yes some autistic people can be charismatic as the list above indicates. The difference is, likely in every case for those people and autistics like them and also any of us that mask fairly well in social situations: We all crash at the end of it when we're back home. Likely in every case, we're not energized by social interaction. It's draining. That's the difference.

    You can add Sarah Hendrickx to the list as well. She's a well known autistic speaker and used to do comedy.

    Since a lot of autistic people can mask and some can even be "charismatic", that's a big reason why we can hear the "You don't seem/look autistic." statements. NT's don't see how we are after social situations. They aren't with us for the days, weeks or even months leading up to a social engagement so they don't witness the stress and anxiety we feel as we mentally prepare for that engagement.

    A big part of autism isn't just what you see, it's what you don't see. That's also why it's often referred to as an "invisible disability".
     
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  12. Primrose

    Primrose Well-Known Member

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    I wouldn't describe myself as charismatic. I'm sometimes told I'm a good listener, approachable and people tell me they feel they can open up to me.
     
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  13. watersprite

    watersprite inadvertent vagabond V.I.P Member

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    As long as I have advanced warning so as to put my mask on, I can be seen as quasi charismatic - temporarily . It’s brief & wears me out. Sudden endings to the energy for the mask means I am done for the day. Probably my partner saw this aspect of my abilities & thought I’d always perform to the mask. No.
    I’m told that without the mask running, I’m not approachable.
     
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  14. Pieceofmind

    Pieceofmind Member

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    Yeah that's what it's like for me, like for example at work when I'm interacting with a lot of people I have my very good days where I can look almost neurotypical but it always falls apart somehow and everyone knows I'm not whether that be through maybe a failure in body language use, my speech gets a bit disoriented, I have trouble finding the right words and I kinda lock up for a sec, or something really catches me off guard.

    But when I'm not at work and am not constricted to some script I need to follow I'm not very great at following without screwing up overall and looking awkward I can be extroverted and charismatic until I run into a wall where I am just out of energy or don't know how to carry on a conversation which usually comes with that energy drop. There will also be a wall where no matter what I do it is somehow always awkward and I can't put my finger on why exactly, I just suddenly feel like an alien.

    One of my huge problems with socializing I run ito every day with normal peoples seems to be that I have a different base of communication altogether because others will often look confused when I'm interacting or expressing things to them. My movements, way I convey emotions through words, I just get a brick wall with normal people like we are not compatible and can't understand eachothers communication even on a better day.
     
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  15. jleeb05

    jleeb05 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I agree that there is no black and white answer. I'm an introvert but I've been called charismatic. I think my prosody is good. I've also been told her that I'm engaging and pretty good at public speaking.

    That said, I definitely agree with those who say it's situational for them. I tend to do better in structured settings. For example, as an attorney it's easier for me to give an opening statement during a trial than it is for me to mingle at a cocktail party.

    In court, I know where I'm supposed to stand, when I'm supposed to speak, what I'm supposed to speak about, etc. On the other hand, in less structured settings or unexpected situations, I tend to become awkward and stumble over my words more frequently. I recall giving an opening statement that I prepared and the judge interrupted me and started asking questions. I could be charismatic and engaging in my scripted opening statement but felt very inept when it came to this unexpected interaction with the Judge.
     
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  16. Au Naturel

    Au Naturel Au Naturel

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    Sure. A lot of people feel Elon Mush is very charismatic. Charisma is a matter of projecting personal confidence, appearing competent, and having an idea that other people want to believe in.
     
  17. Suzette

    Suzette Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    This is exactly what I experience, and no amount of personal observation reveals what I am doing wrong. I really don't get it. I can distinguish no difference between me and them.
     
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2021
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  18. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    I don't think l qualify because some woman really hate me. Men usually like me. That's probably not charisma, thats hormoisma (subset of horny) l think.
     
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  19. QuestJan

    QuestJan Active Member

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    I remain inhibited with people I see over time such as colleagues. I cannot seem to talk around the foot in my mouth. I have never figured out long-term associations.

    I can really rock acquaintances. I use long grocery lines far from home to practice getting people to smile and even laugh. I also have no concerns getting on a stage and presenting my narrow interests. But forming long-term friendships is outta my league.

    I trialed everything I could think of for six decades and have officially given up - not a goal.
     
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  20. Sherlock77

    Sherlock77 Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I do street photography, and stranger portraits as well (photographing people I've never met before)

    But then, I still wouldn't call myself charismatic, I'm very much an observer of the world around me, what street photography really is... Although I do tend to wear fedoras, cowboy hats, and some other rather interesting hats, and I really don't care what other people think of me when I do that... Even having said that I wouldn't call myself charismatic...
     
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