-
Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.
Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:- Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
- Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
- Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
- Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.
We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral
Autism Spectrum Disorder and Modesty
- Thread starter Sportster
- Start date
From my own point of view and experience I'm not likely to consider much of any particular condition one might have relative to their sense of modesty in general. That some people have it, and some don't. Where it may follow along family lines or not at all. No discernible patterns from my perspective except perhaps given sensory and tactile issues those on the spectrum may or may not have.
I suppose for children up to a certain age, I think this is likely to be "par for the course". Though perhaps some parents may have a different uptake depending on the age. I'm not sure.
I do remember my g/f's daughter who at seven wasn't the least bit modest inside the home. Especially in the summer. But then neither was her mother. Though she did understand that she couldn't go outside in her birthday suit. Neither she or her mother were on the spectrum.
As for children with tactile/sensory issues those on the spectrum probably are that much more sensitive to whatever clothing they are wearing at the time. That seems "par for the course" as well, especially at younger ages. But then who knows? NT children may have similar sentiments as well.
I suppose for children up to a certain age, I think this is likely to be "par for the course". Though perhaps some parents may have a different uptake depending on the age. I'm not sure.
I do remember my g/f's daughter who at seven wasn't the least bit modest inside the home. Especially in the summer. But then neither was her mother. Though she did understand that she couldn't go outside in her birthday suit. Neither she or her mother were on the spectrum.
As for children with tactile/sensory issues those on the spectrum probably are that much more sensitive to whatever clothing they are wearing at the time. That seems "par for the course" as well, especially at younger ages. But then who knows? NT children may have similar sentiments as well.
Last edited:
Was pretty modest as a kid if I remember correctly and kept my clothes on though a lot of what I wore bugged me constantly. I remember my mom always having to take the scissors after the elastic in the sleeves and waist of my dresses because I couldn't stand it. Modesty must have been the only thing compelling me to keep those scratchy dresses on. I could see that sensory issues would make a less inhibited child toss their clothes every chance they got. But not me, I just stuck with those miserable dresses.
I have gotten considerably less modest as I have gotten older (took me to my mid 30's to start relaxing about showing some skin), to the point of skinny dipping and being topless while on a float trip. The skinny dipping was for fun, the topless episode was because my bikini top was driving me crazy. The straps just felt like sandpaper after so many hours and I needed a break from the thing.
When my clothes are comfortable I tend to like wearing clothes. Not for modesty reasons but because I like the coziness. I prefer winter clothes and like to wear a few layers that include plaid flannel and a stocking cap.
I would guess that modesty influences how you might handle uncomfortable clothing though if the sensitivities were great enough that might over ride modesty. Anyhoo, don't know how common nudity is among autistics in general but in my family modesty seems to be popular.
I have gotten considerably less modest as I have gotten older (took me to my mid 30's to start relaxing about showing some skin), to the point of skinny dipping and being topless while on a float trip. The skinny dipping was for fun, the topless episode was because my bikini top was driving me crazy. The straps just felt like sandpaper after so many hours and I needed a break from the thing.
When my clothes are comfortable I tend to like wearing clothes. Not for modesty reasons but because I like the coziness. I prefer winter clothes and like to wear a few layers that include plaid flannel and a stocking cap.
I would guess that modesty influences how you might handle uncomfortable clothing though if the sensitivities were great enough that might over ride modesty. Anyhoo, don't know how common nudity is among autistics in general but in my family modesty seems to be popular.
artfull dodger
Well-Known Member
I prefer to be clothed, comfortably, most of the time. Summertime I will sleep in the nude as its more comfortable, same with swimming in the pool after dark or our hot tub. I do not remember as a kid what I was like. I do know that I hate tags in clothing and anything that is harsh or scratchy feeling.
A subject here I have often wondered about too.
Yes, the scratchy tactile issue has always been a discomfort for me, still is, the modesty part never was.
I always felt the most comfortable in the buff (unless it's really cold).
Modesty, what is that? I thought perhaps those on the spectrum would have less than NTs. Reason being we seem to think more for ourselves instead of what others tell us. And you might compare to the tale of the "Apple and the Garden". Innocence and/or being less drawn by sexual urge. I've found more Aspies to be Asexual than NTs. And hey, if you aren't drawn by forbidden fruit, what's the big deal?
I can only go buff where it is accepted due to laws of course. Or in privacy or where people don't think it is a shamey. Such as nudist colony or nude beaches, etc.
Of course I think the root of people thinking it is bad is culture. Religion has made it a long time standing thing to be modest. Go to the rainforest and you get into the non-herded natural people.
As for me I think nothing about it. It's our body and we all have one. Even in the modern cultures today look at the huge differences.
Yes, the scratchy tactile issue has always been a discomfort for me, still is, the modesty part never was.
I always felt the most comfortable in the buff (unless it's really cold).
Modesty, what is that? I thought perhaps those on the spectrum would have less than NTs. Reason being we seem to think more for ourselves instead of what others tell us. And you might compare to the tale of the "Apple and the Garden". Innocence and/or being less drawn by sexual urge. I've found more Aspies to be Asexual than NTs. And hey, if you aren't drawn by forbidden fruit, what's the big deal?
I can only go buff where it is accepted due to laws of course. Or in privacy or where people don't think it is a shamey. Such as nudist colony or nude beaches, etc.
Of course I think the root of people thinking it is bad is culture. Religion has made it a long time standing thing to be modest. Go to the rainforest and you get into the non-herded natural people.
As for me I think nothing about it. It's our body and we all have one. Even in the modern cultures today look at the huge differences.
I stay covered up, but that's because my religious upbringing demanded it. I remember one time when I was 9 years old, I was playing in the creek with cousins at Grandma's farm, and decided my shirt needed to come off because it was hot outside, the shirt was sticking to me uncomfortably, and I thought it would be ok since we were all kids and I didn't have boobs yet. Mom saw me and changed my thinking very quickly...
Nowadays, I'm more likely to walk around town without a bra and my button-down shirt a little more open than my mom likes, but I'm still covered. There's plenty of cleavage, but nothing major showing. I don't see what the big deal is about boobs anyhow, they're just extra fat deposits meant for feeding infants, and have no real use if you AREN'T feeding infants. I always walk around the house in just my boxers and a tshirt (no bra), but will get "decent" if we are expecting company of the religious persuasion.
I agree with the above poster. I only wear clothing because of the temperature, or decency laws. When I'm home alone, I strip as fast as I can. Its a sensory thing for me, but even if there are other people around, I'm comfortable being nude as long as the other folks are okay with it. Modesty is a social construct based on religious dogma and transference of sexual responsibilities to the Other. Makes no sense to me, but I prefer to keep the peace, and my few friends.
Nowadays, I'm more likely to walk around town without a bra and my button-down shirt a little more open than my mom likes, but I'm still covered. There's plenty of cleavage, but nothing major showing. I don't see what the big deal is about boobs anyhow, they're just extra fat deposits meant for feeding infants, and have no real use if you AREN'T feeding infants. I always walk around the house in just my boxers and a tshirt (no bra), but will get "decent" if we are expecting company of the religious persuasion.
I agree with the above poster. I only wear clothing because of the temperature, or decency laws. When I'm home alone, I strip as fast as I can. Its a sensory thing for me, but even if there are other people around, I'm comfortable being nude as long as the other folks are okay with it. Modesty is a social construct based on religious dogma and transference of sexual responsibilities to the Other. Makes no sense to me, but I prefer to keep the peace, and my few friends.
xudo
something and nothing
I'm self conscious so I wouldn't even walk around my house nude. I do sleep nude just because pyjamas really irritate me to sleep in. I feel constricted and they're uncomfortable if you toss and turn while asleep. I try to find clothes that I like and will be comfortable in. I will cut tags and things out of clothes if they irritate me.
Upon investigation of this constitutional equality there are 33 states that do not ban toplessness for women. Only 3 that totally do. The rest are in limbo to decide.
Of course stores, restaurants and even individual towns have the right to their rules just as it is now.
So who knows? Maybe someday it will not be thought about as so terrible. Remember in the 1920's how women had to dress for the beach? Long dress type suits. Times do change. Has already changed in some other countries. It's a world full of diverse ideas. From one extreme to the other.
I don't see the big deal either. My logic was always if men and woman are equal, both should be able to be topless in casual situations like at the beach or doing hot outdoor work around the house. It is Constitutionally backed. Just not a lot being said about it yet.
I just grew up feeling completely at ease with it.
But, then I've always been a chain breaker and a bit of a rebel.
I've always had sensory problems with clothing, but my mother was attentive to these things and would try to buy me clothes that didn't bother me or that I actually liked (or make them for me sometimes -- like with footy one-piece pyjamas, which didn't come in sizes for big kids). As an adult, I'm careful with selecting my clothes and I just don't bother trying to wear things that I know I can't tolerate.
Still, as a pre-school child, I had a few favorite things that were all I ever wanted to wear (it sucked when I outgrew those specific things, very difficult times for everyone) or else I'd go around naked. I don't remember ever stripping down in public, but I was usually in a sort of heavy daze in the sensorily overwhelming world outside our house -- extremely/totally shut down.
I knew by the time I was in kindergarten that people weren't generally supposed to see each other naked, and I think I understood the basic rules for the exceptions (thanks to a children's book that spelled them out) but I remember wandering around in my underwear at home, including when we had company, up until adolescence. (This was almost always totally okay, and when it wasn't I could be convinced to wear more clothing for the benefit of the person who would be uncomfortable if I didn't.)
As an adult, I don't like being naked around others but the reasons for that are complicated....I don't know if I'm actually all that modest. I don't really understand why people get so worked up about nudity -- why the embarrassment and shame exists or why nudity is so sexualized. It all seems odd to me, but I accept that's the way it is....thankfully the discomfort of others makes me uncomfortable, which is a good substitute for actual modesty.
Still, as a pre-school child, I had a few favorite things that were all I ever wanted to wear (it sucked when I outgrew those specific things, very difficult times for everyone) or else I'd go around naked. I don't remember ever stripping down in public, but I was usually in a sort of heavy daze in the sensorily overwhelming world outside our house -- extremely/totally shut down.
I knew by the time I was in kindergarten that people weren't generally supposed to see each other naked, and I think I understood the basic rules for the exceptions (thanks to a children's book that spelled them out) but I remember wandering around in my underwear at home, including when we had company, up until adolescence. (This was almost always totally okay, and when it wasn't I could be convinced to wear more clothing for the benefit of the person who would be uncomfortable if I didn't.)
As an adult, I don't like being naked around others but the reasons for that are complicated....I don't know if I'm actually all that modest. I don't really understand why people get so worked up about nudity -- why the embarrassment and shame exists or why nudity is so sexualized. It all seems odd to me, but I accept that's the way it is....thankfully the discomfort of others makes me uncomfortable, which is a good substitute for actual modesty.
IMO I'd weight such a question almost exclusively along the lines of how they were raised relative to culture and/or religious upbringing or the lack thereof. I just can't wrap my head around how such a thing could be neurologically related on any exclusive basis, myself.
I tend to agree, though where AS is concerned almost anything is possible. Frankly, despite the curiosity, I'm thankful he didn't come bounding out in his birthday suit. There are just some things the brain can't handle or "unsee."
You probably would have had heart failure had you been working in my college dorm in the 70s. On any number of levels aside nudity alone.
Lots of "free-spirited" people concentrated in the same place.
I'm conflicted on that topic. I don't even know how to vote.
My extended family on one side (the side I saw the most) is very open-minded when it comes to nudity. They're not nudists, but I think most of them wouldn't have a problem going to a nudist beach.
I didn't have a religious upbringing either, because while my parents both believe in God, they're from different religions, and didn't want to impose one on me.
As far back in my memories as I can go, I have always been called overly modest, and sometimes a prude, by pretty much everyone around me.
I remember going to the swimming pool with school when I was 6, on a regular basis, and we would change in one common locker room (girls and boys had separate rooms, of course), and even thinking about it now, I remember I felt terror. I became the kid who could change the fastest, and with revealing the less. I wasn't particularly self-conscious or anything, I just hated the thought that anyone could see me in a vulnerable state, including counterparts in a similar state. I don't find nudity shameful either, or the human body ugly, I just am compelled to not show mine. There was no pattern of abuse that this could be traced to.
But at the same time, the stitches on underwear and socks drove me crazy, and I would take them off at any chance I got. I spent most of elementary school without panties on. Meanwhile, I got a sundress with a halter top when I was 8 that I couldn't wear because it would show the top of my back.
It hasn't changed much as an adult. I like my dresses and skirts at the knee because I don't like shorter skirts, and I struggle to find them. You still wouldn't catch me in a halter top showing the top 3rd of my back. Yet I wear as little as I can at home, and fail to see how anyone can stand any clothing to sleep. Partial nudity at doctors' offices is not a problem.
So I'm guessing there's a strong sensory aspect for me. I need certain areas to be uniformly constrained in a certain way, but no itching or cutting feeling. Moral arguments, culture or education don't come into play.
My extended family on one side (the side I saw the most) is very open-minded when it comes to nudity. They're not nudists, but I think most of them wouldn't have a problem going to a nudist beach.
I didn't have a religious upbringing either, because while my parents both believe in God, they're from different religions, and didn't want to impose one on me.
As far back in my memories as I can go, I have always been called overly modest, and sometimes a prude, by pretty much everyone around me.
I remember going to the swimming pool with school when I was 6, on a regular basis, and we would change in one common locker room (girls and boys had separate rooms, of course), and even thinking about it now, I remember I felt terror. I became the kid who could change the fastest, and with revealing the less. I wasn't particularly self-conscious or anything, I just hated the thought that anyone could see me in a vulnerable state, including counterparts in a similar state. I don't find nudity shameful either, or the human body ugly, I just am compelled to not show mine. There was no pattern of abuse that this could be traced to.
But at the same time, the stitches on underwear and socks drove me crazy, and I would take them off at any chance I got. I spent most of elementary school without panties on. Meanwhile, I got a sundress with a halter top when I was 8 that I couldn't wear because it would show the top of my back.
It hasn't changed much as an adult. I like my dresses and skirts at the knee because I don't like shorter skirts, and I struggle to find them. You still wouldn't catch me in a halter top showing the top 3rd of my back. Yet I wear as little as I can at home, and fail to see how anyone can stand any clothing to sleep. Partial nudity at doctors' offices is not a problem.
So I'm guessing there's a strong sensory aspect for me. I need certain areas to be uniformly constrained in a certain way, but no itching or cutting feeling. Moral arguments, culture or education don't come into play.
Last edited:
New Threads
-
-
-
-
Presenting on ABC News / CW News in Iowa on Special Needs Non Profit Resources to Augment Access to Air Travel
- Started by TravelingWiki
- Replies: 0
-
-
-
Embrace Autism - resources for newly diagnosed
- Started by Alexej
- Replies: 0
-
-
Advice about a friendship situation- Started by AuroraBorealis
- Replies: 8
-
And the psych ward says ( a trigger and sensitivity warning)- Started by Jenisautistic
- Replies: 12