Aspie females if you were interested in a man how would you behave around him?

[megacomic]

I'm an Aspie guy interested in an Aspie female who is extremely withdrawn and difficult to read. We have great conversations a but I can not tell if the interest is mutual.

 

[Pats]

Again we're all so very different. I'm shy And don't know how to flirt.

 

[Bolletje]

Have to agree with @Pats, we’re all different. I’m always very direct and forward in expressing my interest.

 

[Autistamatic]

AS people are very often terrible and both dropping hints and picking up on them. She might think she's giving signals and you're not picking up on them or you might be mistaken.
The only way to be sure is to talk about it.
Maybe tell her how much you enjoy spending time with her, mention a couple of her attractive personality traits or things she does that make you smile. Don't go over the top and try to judge her reaction. If it seems favourable, maybe then it might be time to say you'd like to spend more time together...

 

[Mia]

Have seen women flirt with my then boyfriend while I was in the room. He didn't notice. Originally met him several times with a group of friends and talked and we got along really well. Eventually mentioned that I found him interesting and wanted to spend time with him. Later told him I liked being around him. Don't flirt either, so I was direct in indicating to him that I enjoyed his company.

Think one of the clues you should pay attention to if the female is interested in you, she will enjoy your conversations together. She will want to be around you even if she's shy. It's possible that she might not say so directly. Yet the fact that she communicates with you, is at times an indication of her interest.

 

[Tom]

I always take my clues from nature. Try a small gift. If she accepts, it is a good sign.

 

[BraidedPony]

Yummmm TWO meal worms! Lol

 

[Gracey]

I was going to marry my husband,
Whether he wanted to or not
(I am joking)

I was very direct. Didn’t really understand the ‘rules of engagement’ flirting, courting and wooing and so on.

I felt a very strong attraction to him, (for what was probably the first time)

all manner of hormonal/physical changes were happening to me,
I can’t see how it gets any more obvious/natural than that ?

I told him how I felt, he didn’t emigrate ( )
30 years later, we’re still irritating each other.
(I write that with humour)

I say tell her you enjoy your conversations and you’d like to get to know her better.

Be brave and take a 10 second risk (by asking her out)
without needing some sort of guarantee that you won’t get rejected.

Might be the best 10 seconds of your lifetime

 

[Crossbreed]

How can you tell if an Aspie is interested in you...?

Spoiler

She stares at your shoes instead of hers...!

 

[Gracey]

Yummmm TWO meal worms! Lol

If I were single and gifted mealworms, For real,
Instead of tired pick up lines,

I’d appreciate the uniqueness, the puzzle - Working out what the heck !
and the reference to nature and it’s meaning.

Doesn’t mean I’d agree to mate but it would hold my interest

 

[SusanLR]

I'm terrible at trying to read when it comes to being attracted to a man.
But, if we have convesations that we find mutually enjoyable, I try to let him know that
by smiling more, looking him directly in the eyes, showing some interest in him in a friendly way.
Like ask a question on his opinion of something he seems to be interested in.

An example not long ago with a guy I am attracted to and we enjoy talking together:
I noticed an interesting tattoo on his left arm. Like some sort of unknown writing style.
Asked him what it meant.
He perked up and started explaining it was Arabic and meant to remind him to never forget music in life.
He plays acoustic guitar. Next thing I know, he's offering to bring one of his guitars to a nice place
together in a park and play for me!

Just keep your eyes open for little things like this and take advantage of the interest in return.
It shows you are both comfortable together. That's a fine place to be: comfortable!

 

[ftfipps]

I am a guy but you could try this. You should ask her if she has a love interest and if she asks, why did you ask me if I was in a relationship? She is into you. Are you friends with a bunch of her friends? If so, you should be in good shape. Usually, if the girl likes you she will tell her friends and even your friends about it.

 

[Celestiune]

I'm a lesbian but if i liked a girl I'd probably try to hang out with them as much as possible.

 

[Crossbreed]

An example not long ago with a guy I am attracted to and we enjoy talking together:
I noticed an interesting tattoo on his left arm. Like some sort of unknown writing style.
Asked him what it meant.
He perked up and started explaining it was Arabic and meant to remind him to never forget music in life.
He plays acoustic guitar. Next thing I know, he's offering to bring one of his guitars to a nice place
together in a park and play for me!

When I was single, I found some women to be so distractingly pretty that it was hard to formulate an objective, casual conversation with them.

Before my wife's depression, I could [uh, deal with] that distraction [with her, not others], making it easier to focus on what she had to say.

Even being married [read: not on the market], I still, sometimes find myself getting so distracted by other women...

 

[Gracey]

Even being married [read: not on the market], I sometimes find myself getting so distracted by other women...

To date I’ve been rendered speechless once by a mans attractiveness, beauty(?) physique.

If I remember correctly, I think I just stood there staring. Abandoned by my brain, forgot what I was supposed to be doing next.

It wasn’t that I felt any sort of physical attraction (that I remember) I didn’t want to pair up and start anything.

His appearance just took my breath away.
Perfection personified.

The older I’m getting the less I’m noticing distracting beauty.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

How to find out if a female aspie is interested in you: by asking if she is interested in you.

 

[Graphin]

How to find out if a female aspie is interested in you: by asking if she is interested in you.

interested for what?

 

[Ylva]

If you can't read her and she can't read you, stating/asking directly is really the only way to find out. If you're worried about saving face you can do it in private. Over text, even. Same goes if you are worried about putting her on the spot.

Keep in mind that she might need time to process your request whether or not tshe has already thought about it.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

interested for what?

Well the OP doesn't specify, but this rule can be applied to anything. Wondering if she's interested in hanging out and playing Assassins Creed? Ask her! Wondering if she's interested in being your dog walking buddy? Ask her! Wondering if she's interested in a romantic relationship with you? Ask her! Wondering if she's interested in bumping uglies with you? Ask her! Wondering if she's interested in tying you up and whipping you while you call her Your Majesty? … Well in this case I'd actually change my advise to "stop fishing in lake vanilla", but once you find a kinky lady with similar interests the advise goes back to Ask. Her.

It's really very simple... all you have to do is Use Your Words instead of trying to be a mind reader.

 

[inkfingers]

Um. I'm not into romance or anything like that, but the one time I had a crush on a boy (I was maybe 12 or 13) I acted very hyper and talked incessantly about an obscure anime that I watched. Basically, I overloaded him with every little detail of the cartoon, and maybe jumped up and down and acted really weirdly.