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Featured Anyone else like being alone?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Connor W., Mar 11, 2019.

  1. Connor W.

    Connor W. Active Member

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    I prefer to be alone, I really dislike being around other people. I like talking to people on this forum because they are the most like me, but I am so sick and tired of being around other people. I like being alone, I haven't been to school since October because I can't stand how loud and annoying the other kids are. I am 15 years old and I live an "unemployed student" aka "hikkikomori" lifestyle. I am only ever around my family, I only leave my house once and a while when I want to buy some snacks and that's about it. I am happier alone than I am around tons of people, I also have an anxiety disorder so I can't really stand being around people because it sends fear right through me. I prefer being alone because I am a lot more happy that way, I am planning on going back to school in September though as I still want an education and since I missed too much time I have to wait til next school year to go back. I am going to try and see if I can get my psychologist and the school to put a plan in place so I can sit in a quiet room and do my work rather than in a typical classroom setting. I spend my time in my room at the computer.
     
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  2. Loren

    Loren Well-Known Member

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    I do like being alone, more than the average person, it would seem, and I need my solitude, to recharge, after being immersed in sensory over-stimulating environments/ my jobs, that require me to be alert and on top of things, that can prove to be exhausting, for much of the week. If I don't give myself enough time to recharge after a day's work, and on weekends, it can impact my mental wellbeing and productivity, profoundly, the following day and/or week. So, yes, solitude is extremely vital to my existence, although, not as much as you appear to need.
     
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  3. Connor W.

    Connor W. Active Member

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    Yeah, I just like being alone because it's fun :D.
     
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  4. Shamar

    Shamar Well-Known Member

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    For me, its not a matter of liking being alone, its more a matter of disliking people around me, especially crowds. As an anthrophobe, this probably stands to reason. Thus, I prefer to be alone, but don't necessarily like it every time.

    There is a difference between being alone and being lonely.
     
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  5. Nervous Rex

    Nervous Rex High-functioning autistic V.I.P Member

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    I recognize that a certain amount of socialization is good for me, so when someone says, "Let's go to lunch" or invites me to something, I make myself go.

    But I never think to socialize on my own, and I never initiate it. And all my favorite activities are things that I do alone - reading, programming, building models, etc.
     
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  6. Connor W.

    Connor W. Active Member

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    I like to be mostly alone but yeah you're right - socialization is good for you. I am technically not really alone though as I live with my family and I'm 15, so I still have people to talk to.
     
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  7. Judge

    Judge Well-Known Member

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    I'm apt to think that for most of us, periodic solitude is an absolute necessity.

    Just one of those traits that profoundly defines and differentiates us from Neurotypicals. Something that rather than alienates us from our own kind, in fact energizes us emotionally and socially.

    Or as how so many of us here put it, solitude allows us to "recharge our batteries".

    The only real downside to all of it is how it can be so easily misinterpreted by others. When those around us might take it personally, not understanding that it is exclusively about us and not them.
     
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2019
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  8. Misery

    Misery Photo-Negative

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    I'm around family alot, but even then, I tend to stick to my own space within the house. Gaming is my main hobby, and that doesnt require that I be around others really.

    Not to mention I'm a total misanthrope... just cant stand people. I can only handle so much idiocy before my patience snaps, and in the presense of most people, this never takes very long.

    The big exception is if I'm off at a convention. THAT is utter bloody chaos. But I can handle that, though I dont interact with anyone much... I just do my own thing. And I can retreat to my hotel room at any point if I should need a break.

    On a normal day-to-day basis though, ehhhh.... I need to get out of the house each day. NEED to. Otherwise I get stir-crazy. But that sure doesnt mean I have to interact with anyone. I have to go to the gas station for my blasted caffiene fix (actually as I type this I'm currently waiting for the car to warm up so I can do exactly that) and I might go to the Walmart or whatever. Sometimes I'll go to some forest preserve for a hike. Occaisionally I'll drive around randomly for the heck of it. But actual interaction... yeah, no. It really doesnt happen except with family and the one close friend I have that lives near here. And I sure as heck never go to places that could be specifically called "social". Alot of people go to restaurants or bars or movies or whatever. I refuse.

    Today, I'll be going and getting my stupid drink, stopping at the Walmart to pick up stuff, and then that'll probably be it for the day.
     
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  9. Gracey

    Gracey Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Not so much ‘like it’

    Starting to realise I need it if I want to keep some sort of balance, mood wise.

    Took a while to figure out I’m not bionic after all.

    (Don’t make that noise, run in slow motion or leap tall buildings)

    :)
     
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  10. BlueSky Aozora

    BlueSky Aozora Well-Known Member

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    Because the internet exists XD
    Imagine if you live in the era 15~20 years ago where there's no internet
     
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  11. Connor W.

    Connor W. Active Member

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    Today is the 30th anniversary of the Internet, there WAS internet 15-20 yrs ago. I was born 15 years ago and 20 years ago was the days of dialup.
     
  12. clg114

    clg114 Still crazy, after all these years. Staff Member V.I.P Member

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    Thirty years ago I was 43. I had machines that filled in nicely. Very powerful machines. A dirt bike in the summer and a snowmobile in the winter. The internet and my computer have never given me the adrenaline rush that those machines did. So you see, it wasn't to bad at all back then.
     
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  13. BlueSky Aozora

    BlueSky Aozora Well-Known Member

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    Okay okay perhaps in my not-so-modern poor family only.. We didnt have that at that time. That was an embarrassing mistake.. (Plus, the internet was not as good as today's)

    Btw i like to be alone too :) Sometimes i do prefer company
     
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  14. BlueSky Aozora

    BlueSky Aozora Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, we might be living healthier at those times.. Not too bad.. Although now i love the internet too
     
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  15. Progster

    Progster Gone sideways to the sun V.I.P Member

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    Yes, I like being alone. Being with people generally require that you interact with them, and that's hard work. I can't really relax around people and only ever really feel relaxed when I'm on my own.
     
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  16. Clueless in Canada

    Clueless in Canada Well-Known Member

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    Yes, I do. There are a few people I can be with and we don't need to interact and also a few I am comfortable having conversation with. I love living alone although I am doing quite well living with my partner. We like being alone together companionably.
     
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  17. Rune

    Rune New Member

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    I live with my folks, but I'm alone most of the time. I'd rather talk to people online rather than my mum and stepdad. I know that they love me, but they're rubbish at actually listening when I am trying to express my thoughts and feelings. So I bottle it up most of the time until I'm with my dad or friends I am comfortable around.
     
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  18. Kirsty

    Kirsty ND

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    So true. I prefer to ‘hide’ in a crowd meaning others can do most of the talking while I enjoy being there, but not talk as much as them. That in itself can make it hard to relax at times as I’m expected to be more verbal which can end up in me feeling inferior and judged silently.
     
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2019
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  19. Renzo

    Renzo Active Member

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    I'm a lone wolf too. Being around people drains my energy, which gives me headaches.
     
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  20. onlything

    onlything something something V.I.P Member

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    I like being alone. Other people drain my energy and make me anxious and paranoid. But then, I don't like being lonely although I still prefer being alone above getting exhausted due to social contact. On the other hand, I remember that I enjoyed solitude much more when I was younger - when I didn't really understand how it was to be comfortable with people you spend time with. Loneliness is somehow much greater after you realise that you are lonely, since you remember how it was not to be. So, I suppose, it's a love-hate relationship at the moment.
     
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