Announcing a successful exhaustion negotiation

[WereBear]

Evening before last, I was watching something silly with Mr WereBear, and he was showing me something on his tablet, and I was feeling myself withdrawing. This isn't usual; I treasure my time with him.

But I realized it was a sign of sensory overload.

This is a huge breakthrough for me. Prior to my diagnosis a year and a half ago, I would not have known that was going on, and I would run myself into near-paralysis.

What made it especially tricky was the next day is one of my most demanding and necessary, and along with that stress I skipped lunch to make sure I met the deadline, and then he wanted Chinese food and I had promised, only the town was filling up for an event and I walked a total of six blocks to pick it up and get back to where I had parked.

I arrived home and announced, "I have to decompress."

"Oh, sure, we'll put in that comedy show you like."

"No, honey, from everything."

"We can put in the music video we just got and you can just listen."

"No, honey. Everything. I am sitting in the living room alone in dim light and no music and see if I can read. Might not even do that."

"Okay." I could tell he was puzzled, but when two hours later I appeared in the bedroom, saying I needed to go to sleep, he went off to his studio to let me. And I could.

Woke up this morning feeling pretty good. Now that I have trained myself to become aware, it doesn't get so bad before I take corrective steps. And now I know some of the corrective steps.

 

[Progster]

I get that too - I feel myself withdrawing and I get a kind of pressure in my head and start looking for escape routes. When I was at social events, I used to not talk much, go to the bathroom for a few minutes, or go outside for some fresh air, or say that I'm tired and go home. It is indeed very useful to be able to recognise the signs and withdraw before it gets to the point of complete overload.

I have a student that causes me to feel like that, I'm not sure how to deal with it.

 

[Suzanne]

Wow, Mr WereBear is a good hubby indeed. My husband would tell me to stop being so ridiculous.

Just yesterday, I made him a coffee, despite dinner being virtually ready, because he had been working in dire weather.

Some time later, I see him pouring his coffee into his empty glass and I started to retch and had to go out of the room and the reason? Because in a usual cup, all I see, when I make him coffee, is the swirling effect on the top, which is ok, but the idea of milk with coffee gets my tummy not feeling so well and thus, seeing the glass and him fiddling about with it, just made me feel nasty. I hate people fiddling with food and drink.

He does not look puzzled; he looks as if he is about to phone the psychiatric ward, to take me a way with my hand tied in front of me.

But, because I do recognise my own "eccentricity", I must acknowledge others too, and a situation my husband found himself in at work, actually caused him to wake up with a pounding headache and when, it was decided it was this issue, he said: how insane is that? Well, yes, it does sound weird, but hey, who am I to talk when I have my own weirdities lol

 

[Keigan]

Pause, rest, reset - move forward!

 

[WereBear]

My husband would tell me to stop being so ridiculous.

This keeps bothering me. I would find that very unsupportive. From what you say elsewhere, he is equally unsupportive of himself, so it sounds like one of those macho things where a person isn't supposed to have feelings or something?

I am puzzled and confused.