• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

Advice on Narcissistic Brother

Fino

Alex
V.I.P Member
I believe my only reference to this has been on my thread about Thanksgiving.

I moved back in with my parents four months ago, after I finished college, in order to pay off loans and return to school for one more year. I had been gone from my crazy family for three years, living near the college I attended. When I got back, they had gotten much worse, mostly my oldest brother.

I have three siblings, two brothers and one sister, who is trans. My oldest brother has never been diagnosed, but I would bet my life he has a personality disorder (runs in the family) and my guess is that it's NPD.

My mom is co-dependent, also runs in the family apparently. Her mom killed herself when her children got married and left. My dad has explained that my mom now acts much like her mom, which involves enabling the NPD brother who, by the way, is 33. He attempted a career in film, failed, came back, and slowly got sicker and sicker.

For the past year, he's yelled at everyone about conspiracies and about Christianity and about sin and becomes loud and aggressive if anyone ever argues about anything. Every little thing becomes an explosive argument and if you stop responding, he'll yell about that.

The reason I made this thread was because it recently escalated from that yelling and insulting to something else, and I think it'd be a good idea for me to get other people's input before I rashly act, which is my tendency.

A few days ago, he assaulted our sister, yelling about how she's not really a girl. I wasn't there, I just had it recounted by my younger brother. There were menial things that preceded it that led him to believe that it was her fault he assaulted her. Everyone blamed him, and he thinks everyone is conspiring against him because of that.

He said he plans on moving out because no one cares about him and we're not really his family (except me, I've stayed out to the point that he doesn't hate me). Everyone said okay, if he wants to move out then go ahead. But that wouldn't be possible, so I don't know what the plan is. He's alienated all his friends and has no source of income.

After a couple days, he went into a rage about no one caring that he'll move out and no one caring what he does. He's continually yelling justifications for his assault and wants people to "be on his side".

In discussions on conspiracies and other issues, I've always been diplomatic, kind, and patient. Everyone in the family is his enemy except for me, for now.

I was thinking about making this thread for the past few days and decided to do it now because he's currently yelling and has been for a half hour. I feel obligated to somewhat listen in case it becomes violent but don't want to pay too much attention to it, but as I was editing the post for grammar, he stopped yelling and started sobbing, which is unusual.

I don't know if that changes anything or means anything, so I'll just post and move on..
 
The sobbing would suggest maybe not NPD. Narc's never cry. Maybe he has a delusional disorder if he is going on about paranoia? Or maybe he cracked.

If someone saw me in my worst meltdown, I could have every dx in the book. But they are not true.

Is he melting down?
 
Last edited:
If he assaulted your sister (like actually hit her) then that's Assault and he should be arrested. I say if he does anything similar in the near future to call the police before things get even more worse and he happens to really, really crack and potentially commits 2nd Degree Murder. I know most people who're that mentally unstable can react by doing that as they don't quite think things through thoroughly when in that state of mind.

Is it Schizophrenia that runs in your family by any chance as well? I ask because over 10 years ago when I was living where I was previously, a man who was schizophrenic and didn't take his medication as he was supposed to killed his 3 children who went to the same school as me in their home as he believed their mom was abusing them and such.
 
Wish i had some better advice but the situation you're in right now seems highly sensitive. Such instability isn't predictable unless you know him well enough.... i think only you would know best for this.

If you call the cops and they arrest him he won't be held for long and will be right back out. Could spell trouble.
On the other hand if nothing is done his violent behavior may escalate.

Look for each other as a group. Protect each other.

You could be on his side and that might help stabilize things or at some point during conspiracy talk he may find you out and flip.
What was his side of the story of why he attacked your sister, did she provoke him into it or?

Additional thoughts -
If the conspiracy thing is a recent development... uhm... when people first get into it they are usually met with Alex Jones... Who yells a lot, is loud. Goes on long tangents. What's worse is he uses:
Neuro Linguistic Programming, Every fallacy in the book, some MK ultra sub program techniques / Trauma based mind control, subliminals, you name it... against the viewer not really for their benefit.
If someone realizes... comes to understand that the world doesn't work like they thought it does, cognitive dissonance sets in and if they're met with someone like Jones when looking for answers there's is a possibility that in a small percentage of viewers they can become like Jones for a time. If they learned too many dirty truths too fast they can lose their sanity.If they heavily buy into the lies spun the same could happen as well. Usually it's temporary... until they find out Jones is a shill and there are no such things as literal reptilian overlords ruling the planet.

Did this start after he returned home?

he stopped yelling and started sobbing, which is unusual.
Cognitive dissonance maybe ... Trouble coming to terms with a thing
 
The sobbing would suggest maybe not NPD. Narc's never cry. Maybe he has a delusional disorder if he is going on about paranoia? Or maybe he cracked.

If someone saw me in my worst meltdown, I could have every dx in the book. But they are not true.

Is he melting down?

After he started sobbing, he went upstairs with my mother and they were there for an hour, so it's hard to say if he's melting down since I didn't visually observe his behavior at first and didn't observe any of his behavior in any way during that hour. He's been ranting on and off since then, but I haven't been paying attention to the content, I just hear the seemingly endless stream of words in the back.

I didn't think of that about the crying. He's been abusing marijuana with a high THC content day and night for several years now so it'd be hard to say whether delusions are from a disorder or drug-induced, right?

The reason I had been thinking NPD is because of his sudden, daily rage bouts of rage, his sense of entitlement, his inability to accept any differing opinions and reiteration of things like, "I would know," and other similar things, and his apparent lack of empathy for the constant turmoil he alone causes, as well as his explanation that the reason he hasn't succeeded in film is because nobody understands him and people should be seeking his work without any effort made on his part.

He believes the rapture is soon.
 
If he assaulted your sister (like actually hit her) then that's Assault and he should be arrested. I say if he does anything similar in the near future to call the police before things get even more worse and he happens to really, really crack and potentially commits 2nd Degree Murder. I know most people who're that mentally unstable can react by doing that as they don't quite think things through thoroughly when in that state of mind.

Is it Schizophrenia that runs in your family by any chance as well? I ask because over 10 years ago when I was living where I was previously, a man who was schizophrenic and didn't take his medication as he was supposed to killed his 3 children who went to the same school as me in their home as he believed their mom was abusing them and such.

That was my thinking (the first paragraph), and I told the rest of my family exactly that. I said if they don't do something to make some sort of tangible change, then I'm going to start doing something myself. Which is why I thought to make this thread.

I have no knowledge of Schizophrenia in the family. I did consider schizophrenia as a possibility here, though. It's just confusing because of the drug use. But he believes medication is mind-control and that people are influencing his emotions telepathically and that's why he's unhappy most of the time.
 
I agree with @Isadoorian If he is abusing someone, that is different. Assault HAS to be addressed or it will get worse. Has he done this before?

No, that's what I meant in the OP when I said it "escalated to something else." And the need for it to be addressed is my thought exactly. I came home late and was told about this and immediately went to my parents, turned off their movie, and demanded we talk about it.

In the past, he yelled, cursed, insulted, broke things, punched walls, threw things, and threatened violence, but never actually hit somebody.
 
Wish i had some better advice but the situation you're in right now seems highly sensitive. Such instability isn't predictable unless you know him well enough.... i think only you would know best for this.

If you call the cops and they arrest him he won't be held for long and will be right back out. Could spell trouble.
On the other hand if nothing is done his violent behavior may escalate.

Look for each other as a group. Protect each other.

You could be on his side and that might help stabilize things or at some point during conspiracy talk he may find you out and flip.
What was his side of the story of why he attacked your sister, did she provoke him into it or?

Additional thoughts -
If the conspiracy thing is a recent development... uhm... when people first get into it they are usually met with Alex Jones... Who yells a lot, is loud. Goes on long tangents. What's worse is he uses:
Neuro Linguistic Programming, Every fallacy in the book, some MK ultra sub program techniques / Trauma based mind control, subliminals, you name it... against the viewer not really for their benefit.
If someone realizes... comes to understand that the world doesn't work like they thought it does, cognitive dissonance sets in and if they're met with someone like Jones when looking for answers there's is a possibility that in a small percentage of viewers they can become like Jones for a time. If they learned too many dirty truths too fast they can lose their sanity.If they heavily buy into the lies spun the same could happen as well. Usually it's temporary... until they find out Jones is a shill and there are no such things as literal reptilian overlords ruling the planet.

Did this start after he returned home?

he stopped yelling and started sobbing, which is unusual.
Cognitive dissonance maybe ... Trouble coming to terms with a thing

He was yelling at my mom about something completely trivial. My sister told him to stop yelling. He said to mind her own business and pushed her out of the room. They share the room, and she tried to enter again. He grabbed her to sorta push/carry her out, kind of like a bouncer? She pushed back, at which point he repeatedly hit her until her and our mom were able to get her away and she ran off crying and left the house.

He believes she initiated the violence, thus proving she isn't female, and I was giving a piano recital an hour after this and everyone decided he couldn't go. I received several texts from him saying that our family has turned against him and he's sorry but will not be coming to the recital. I got those texts before I found out what happened, so I just dismissed it as his usual craziness, not imagining that it was anything like this.

That's very interesting what you said about the conspiracies. I have heard of Alex Jones but haven't looked into the phenomena you describe.

It did start after he returned home. He failed to get into a traveling group he auditioned for in Chicago. Cognitive dissonance is not something I had considered here. I had always assumed it was triggered by his failure and return but not to the point of cognitive dissonance. Maybe it's an inability to accept the failure?

Considering his confidence, I imagine he considered his success inevitable.He is constantly explaining why various famous people are not actually any good and don't deserve to be successful. Around the same time, he became engulfed in the Illuminati conspiracy, which involves an explanation for fame as an aspect of the group. People sell their souls to the devil in order to be talented or successful and become part of the Illuminati and, subsequently, the media.

What a ridiculously complex set of defense mechanisms.
 
I do think people misuse medical conditions a lot. Chances are this guy is just a massive creep.

I do wish people would stop trying to diagnose others.
 
Narcisscitic people are the worst for us Aspies to deal with, always trying to gaslight others into taking the blame for their fantasies. Causing all that drama that we can't make sense of. Your brother's behavior shows he has some serious condition but it's hard to pinpoint which one because there are so many labels being bandied about by the supposedly intelligent head shrinkers who coined them but no actual explanations or solutions - conflicting or no information whatsoever about causes, symptoms or cures, just name calling and prejudice, no real help.

I came home late and was told about this and immediately went to my parents, turned off their movie, and demanded we talk about it.
Continue narrative Please.

He was raised to be like this in the same chaotic household you described growing up in, where the parents weren't ready, willing, or able to try to help you. Why are they keeping three adult children in chaos under their roof? What are they ready, willing, and able to do for him now????

He is obviously hurting inside and needs some kind of intervention before he hurts himself or others. Unfortunately, until he hits rock bottom in his mind and decides he wants to be a healthy mature grown up, nothing you or anybody else does to help him is going to work. His arrogance would indicate he is not ready to face his demons yet. Therefore, IMO your number 1 priority is to protect yourself from his wrath. If you seem to take his side in all this, he will try to manipulate you into codependency and upon failing to enlist you, you will become his next target. Also, if you try to confront him directly about his behavior, without the full cooperation of the rest of the family, you will become the target of the whole family. Been there done that. You are too valuable and have come too far in the right direction to have that happen to you.
 
After he started sobbing, he went upstairs with my mother and they were there for an hour, so it's hard to say if he's melting down since I didn't visually observe his behavior at first and didn't observe any of his behavior in any way during that hour. He's been ranting on and off since then, but I haven't been paying attention to the content, I just hear the seemingly endless stream of words in the back.

I didn't think of that about the crying. He's been abusing marijuana with a high THC content day and night for several years now so it'd be hard to say whether delusions are from a disorder or drug-induced, right?

The reason I had been thinking NPD is because of his sudden, daily rage bouts of rage, his sense of entitlement, his inability to accept any differing opinions and reiteration of things like, "I would know," and other similar things, and his apparent lack of empathy for the constant turmoil he alone causes, as well as his explanation that the reason he hasn't succeeded in film is because nobody understands him and people should be seeking his work without any effort made on his part.

He believes the rapture is soon.
Oh my! I would say not NPD but breaking down into something else. Paranoia, delusions...it really seems to be more of a delusional disorder, but I am not a shrink. I would say PLEASE get him to a shrink and fast! Section him if you can.

He needs help right now, not any kind of derision. Later on of he turns out to be a jerk after his breakdown, well, people who breakdown can still be jerks.

But the sad fact is that what if a jerk REALLY wants to change? What if Hitler had a change of heart? Something your reputation is set early and even if you want to change, it's too late. In fact, even if you DO CHANGE, it can be too late.

So what if Hitler had a change of heart? The damage was done. Distance yourself is all I can say.
 
He believes she initiated the violence, thus proving she isn't female,
Lol there are many violent females today though

and I was giving a piano recital an hour after this and everyone decided he couldn't go. I received several texts from him saying that our family has turned against him and he's sorry but will not be coming to the recital. I got those texts before I found out what happened, so I just dismissed it as his usual craziness, not imagining that it was anything like this.

It did start after he returned home. He failed to get into a traveling group he auditioned for in Chicago. Cognitive dissonance is not something I had considered here. I had always assumed it was triggered by his failure and return but not to the point of cognitive dissonance. Maybe it's an inability to accept the failure?
It's definitely not because of his failure but something associated with it. People don't jump into conspiracy because they fail at something. It's usually because something changes their world view. They become aware of things that others like to hide from themselves and dismiss. He learned something while on that trip. Whether that's accidentally seeing something happen, being involved with certain things or someone else pointing him in a certain direction. Along those lines.




Considering his confidence, I imagine he considered his success inevitable.He is constantly explaining why various famous people are not actually any good and don't deserve to be successful. Around the same time, he became engulfed in the Illuminati conspiracy, which involves an explanation for fame as an aspect of the group. People sell their souls to the devil in order to be talented or successful and become part of the Illuminati and, subsequently, the media.

A lot of this is true, yet it's often misunderstood by both polar opposites. With the stage he is at, using trigger words like illuminati it causes most people to become immediately dismissive regardless of what's being said. So he won't be able to convince any of you of anything. Right now he thinks he is helping you guys out by doing so but he isn't far enough yet in studies and research to realize how insanely difficult it is to change someone else's core beliefs like this especially at an early stage and the kind of burden it can bring. And why would he want to burden you guys with that truth in the first place? right. He hasn't thought of that yet, still in early stages.

If you can convince him to keep the conspiracy discussions with other people who are into conspiracy (maybe he can find an online group or something) then i think a load of pressure would be off of you and your family. He will have people to discuss this with and so less would be directed at you and your family. Eventually someone will make him understand why he can't convince you guys and why it's a waste of time or dangerous to do so.

Lets say you knew about the pedophilic rings in hollywood, the ritualistic sacrificing of children, the abduction and trauma based mind control of children into adulthood. The injection of "alters" or multiple personalities to perform at the absolute apex of your untapped potential. Lets say you told that to someone who has absolutely no idea about any of the things. right. Obviously it would seem crazy or delusional. It directly conflicts with your world view and it's something you have absolutely no knowledge about. Anyone would reject it.. Their life is fine right now in ignorance. The implications of this are so shocking that anyone would reject it, as a defense mechanism. Because who would want to live in a world like that, right? Ewww, scary truth get away from me! :fearscream: lol




I know someone who starkly rejects all conspiracies even the ones that have been declassified and proven factual without a shadow of a doubt. It's the psyche protecting itself. This person is a perfect example of many. This stuff isn't for everyone. This someone reacts in the exact same way if i ever talk about how bad drugs or psychiatrists are. At a core level they believe the 8-12 prescriptions they are taking are good and safe placebo effect takes hold, anything that threatens that must be obliterated even if it is truth. Lol
 
I didn't think of that about the crying. He's been abusing marijuana with a high THC content day and night for several years now so it'd be hard to say whether delusions are from a disorder or drug-induced, right?

This right here. High doses of THC typically with a sativa strain are known to cause paranoia. Smoking that while going through the hoops is a bad idea lol. It should also be noted that because you don't understand something it doesn't make it a delusion.
Dems call conservatives delusional.
Conservatives call dems delusional.

Drug addicts call clean people delusional.
Clean people call drug addicts delusional.

It's just polar opposites saying things they don't understand as "hah, your delusional because i don't get it".
 
I do think people misuse medical conditions a lot. Chances are this guy is just a massive creep.

I do wish people would stop trying to diagnose others.

Did you read the whole thing? I'm not trying to imply you didn't, I'm just curious to know if that's your conclusion after reading every word or if you just got the gist of it.

The last word, one I had never heard, suddenly changed when I quoted you!
 
Narcisscitic people are the worst for us Aspies to deal with, always trying to gaslight others into taking the blame for their fantasies. Causing all that drama that we can't make sense of. Your brother's behavior shows he has some serious condition but it's hard to pinpoint which one because there are so many labels being bandied about by the supposedly intelligent head shrinkers who coined them but no actual explanations or solutions - conflicting or no information whatsoever about causes, symptoms or cures, just name calling and prejudice, no real help.

Continue narrative Please.

He was raised to be like this in the same chaotic household you described growing up in, where the parents weren't ready, willing, or able to try to help you. Why are they keeping three adult children in chaos under their roof? What are they ready, willing, and able to do for him now????

He is obviously hurting inside and needs some kind of intervention before he hurts himself or others. Unfortunately, until he hits rock bottom in his mind and decides he wants to be a healthy mature grown up, nothing you or anybody else does to help him is going to work. His arrogance would indicate he is not ready to face his demons yet. Therefore, IMO your number 1 priority is to protect yourself from his wrath. If you seem to take his side in all this, he will try to manipulate you into codependency and upon failing to enlist you, you will become his next target. Also, if you try to confront him directly about his behavior, without the full cooperation of the rest of the family, you will become the target of the whole family. Been there done that. You are too valuable and have come too far in the right direction to have that happen to you.

I had been saying for months that he is sick and in pain, needs help, just like you said, and is being ignored, and I described all his behavior as asking for help. I've always described my dad as invisible. He has no input, avoids all conflict, and rarely speaks. He's almost certainly autistic. All action falls to my mom. She has been defending him all along, saying that there's nothing wrong with him, "It's just..." or "he just..." She's a master of minimization. Every time I attempted suicide, she said I wasn't depressed and I'm not sick and there's nothing wrong with me, I was just tired.

I tried more forcibly to convince them that he needs help, that nothing will change except to get worse unless he sees a psychiatrist, psychologist or both. They both agreed for the first time and said they would talk to him. I said if they didn't soon, I would, but all the posts here are kind of making me reconsider.

And it's four adult children, one wasn't involved much in this.
 
Oh my! I would say not NPD but breaking down into something else. Paranoia, delusions...it really seems to be more of a delusional disorder, but I am not a shrink. I would say PLEASE get him to a shrink and fast! Section him if you can.

He needs help right now, not any kind of derision. Later on of he turns out to be a jerk after his breakdown, well, people who breakdown can still be jerks.

But the sad fact is that what if a jerk REALLY wants to change? What if Hitler had a change of heart? Something your reputation is set early and even if you want to change, it's too late. In fact, even if you DO CHANGE, it can be too late.

So what if Hitler had a change of heart? The damage was done. Distance yourself is all I can say.

He's been abrasive, combative, angry, argumentative, explosive, illogical all our lives. Would the consistency and length of that suggest something closer to a personality disorder or are some people just all of those traits?

I've also been wondering, and can't find information on it but because I'm not sure how to research/word it, if the predisposition for a personality disorder is specific to that disorder or if it's a predisposition to personality disorders in general. For example, I'm Borderline, so does that mean there's a genetic predisposition for Borderline or one for personality disorders and particular factors led to Borderline specifically? Because if it's for the disorder specifically then wouldn't BPD be likely in his case, just because of mine?
 
He believes she initiated the violence, thus proving she isn't female,
Lol there are many violent females today though

and I was giving a piano recital an hour after this and everyone decided he couldn't go. I received several texts from him saying that our family has turned against him and he's sorry but will not be coming to the recital. I got those texts before I found out what happened, so I just dismissed it as his usual craziness, not imagining that it was anything like this.

It did start after he returned home. He failed to get into a traveling group he auditioned for in Chicago. Cognitive dissonance is not something I had considered here. I had always assumed it was triggered by his failure and return but not to the point of cognitive dissonance. Maybe it's an inability to accept the failure?
It's definitely not because of his failure but something associated with it. People don't jump into conspiracy because they fail at something. It's usually because something changes their world view. They become aware of things that others like to hide from themselves and dismiss. He learned something while on that trip. Whether that's accidentally seeing something happen, being involved with certain things or someone else pointing him in a certain direction. Along those lines.




Considering his confidence, I imagine he considered his success inevitable.He is constantly explaining why various famous people are not actually any good and don't deserve to be successful. Around the same time, he became engulfed in the Illuminati conspiracy, which involves an explanation for fame as an aspect of the group. People sell their souls to the devil in order to be talented or successful and become part of the Illuminati and, subsequently, the media.

A lot of this is true, yet it's often misunderstood by both polar opposites. With the stage he is at, using trigger words like illuminati it causes most people to become immediately dismissive regardless of what's being said. So he won't be able to convince any of you of anything. Right now he thinks he is helping you guys out by doing so but he isn't far enough yet in studies and research to realize how insanely difficult it is to change someone else's core beliefs like this especially at an early stage and the kind of burden it can bring. And why would he want to burden you guys with that truth in the first place? right. He hasn't thought of that yet, still in early stages.

If you can convince him to keep the conspiracy discussions with other people who are into conspiracy (maybe he can find an online group or something) then i think a load of pressure would be off of you and your family. He will have people to discuss this with and so less would be directed at you and your family. Eventually someone will make him understand why he can't convince you guys and why it's a waste of time or dangerous to do so.

Lets say you knew about the pedophilic rings in hollywood, the ritualistic sacrificing of children, the abduction and trauma based mind control of children into adulthood. The injection of "alters" or multiple personalities to perform at the absolute apex of your untapped potential. Lets say you told that to someone who has absolutely no idea about any of the things. right. Obviously it would seem crazy or delusional. It directly conflicts with your world view and it's something you have absolutely no knowledge about. Anyone would reject it.. Their life is fine right now in ignorance. The implications of this are so shocking that anyone would reject it, as a defense mechanism. Because who would want to live in a world like that, right? Ewww, scary truth get away from me! :fearscream: lol




I know someone who starkly rejects all conspiracies even the ones that have been declassified and proven factual without a shadow of a doubt. It's the psyche protecting itself. This person is a perfect example of many. This stuff isn't for everyone. This someone reacts in the exact same way if i ever talk about how bad drugs or psychiatrists are. At a core level they believe the 8-12 prescriptions they are taking are good and safe placebo effect takes hold, anything that threatens that must be obliterated even if it is truth. Lol

Thank you! That's a lot of new information for me that I haven't considered, especially the first part.

Is this "someone" that reacts to you talking about how bad drugs someone in your life or someone here? It sounds like something I would do LOL But I remember consciously resisting responding to that more than once, I think.. :eek:
 
This right here. High doses of THC typically with a sativa strain are known to cause paranoia. Smoking that while going through the hoops is a bad idea lol. It should also be noted that because you don't understand something it doesn't make it a delusion.
Dems call conservatives delusional.
Conservatives call dems delusional.

Drug addicts call clean people delusional.
Clean people call drug addicts delusional.

It's just polar opposites saying things they don't understand as "hah, your delusional because i don't get it".

This is why I have tried in the past to talk to him about either not smoking or smoking a different strain or one with less THC. He seemed receptive but hasn't made any change as far as I know. A psychiatrist wouldn't be able to diagnose or treat much if he's doing that, right?

And what you said about delusions is exactly why I have never focused on his conspiracy interests as the problem. Plenty of happy, normal people are interested in conspiracies. People can believe what they want to. It's when you're yelling about it every day and insulting people who don't immediately agree that there's a problem. So the specific subject of the yelling isn't really even relevant, although it certainly doesn't help, in the eyes of the majority.
 
Wow, okay, I have to take this in...
My oldest brother has never been diagnosed, but I would bet my life he has a personality disorder (runs in the family) and my guess is that it's NPD.

Her mom killed herself when her children got married and left. My dad has explained that my mom now acts much like her mom, which involves enabling the NPD brother who, by the way, is 33. He attempted a career in film, failed, came back, and slowly got sicker and sicker.
If your dad knows that your mom is just enabling your psycho brother, why hasn't he just put you and your other sibling (minus the narcissistic brother) and drive off without telling your mom and oldest brother? That'll mean that you would be out of the way of danger for quite a while, and you don't have your brother's enabler alongside you anymore.
For the past year, he's yelled at everyone about conspiracies and about Christianity and about sin and becomes loud and aggressive if anyone ever argues about anything. Every little thing becomes an explosive argument and if you stop responding, he'll yell about that.
Well, here's the thing about narcissists: If you start reacting, but then suddenly stop, they'd get even more mad. Try not to make arguments and pretend to agree. It's better to agree to disagree instead of making your house simulate a nuke.
I think it'd be a good idea for me to get other people's input before I rashly act, which is my tendency.
Okay, that is a good idea. Thanks for asking. It's better to receive feedback from others before acting. I am glad that you tend to do so.
A few days ago, he assaulted our sister, yelling about how she's not really a girl. I wasn't there, I just had it recounted by my younger brother. There were menial things that preceded it that led him to believe that it was her fault he assaulted her. Everyone blamed him, and he thinks everyone is conspiring against him because of that.
Narcissists always try to cover all their wrong-doings up and blame others for their actions, when it was they who are to blame. Good thing you didn't see the abuse, tho.
He said he plans on moving out because no one cares about him and we're not really his family (except me, I've stayed out to the point that he doesn't hate me). Everyone said okay, if he wants to move out then go ahead. But that wouldn't be possible, so I don't know what the plan is. He's alienated all his friends and has no source of income.
Well, if he has no source of income and no friends, and, since he brought it on himself, he should just be homeless and let the shelters deal with him.
After a couple days, he went into a rage about no one caring that he'll move out and no one caring what he does. He's continually yelling justifications for his assault and wants people to "be on his side".
Narcissists also try to justify everything that they have done wrong, despite there being no way that they can. They also like it when people support them. The dude is insane.
In discussions on conspiracies and other issues, I've always been diplomatic, kind, and patient. Everyone in the family is his enemy except for me, for now.
Maybe your family members should just be the same as you, as well. Of course, they aren't like you and have far different personalities than you, so that would be impossible.
I was thinking about making this thread for the past few days and decided to do it now because he's currently yelling and has been for a half hour. I feel obligated to somewhat listen in case it becomes violent but don't want to pay too much attention to it, but as I was editing the post for grammar, he stopped yelling and started sobbing, which is unusual.

I don't know if that changes anything or means anything, so I'll just post and move on..
He was probably crying only to play the victim card. Ignore him doing that. Narcissists also absolutely love the victim card, and will take any chance they find to play it. Pay no attention to it and give him 0 sympathy for doing it. It'll just enable him further.
he went upstairs with my mother and they were there for an hour, so it's hard to say if he's melting down since I didn't visually observe his behavior at first and didn't observe any of his behavior in any way during that hour. He's been ranting on and off since then, but I haven't been paying attention to the content, I just hear the seemingly endless stream of words in the back.
You could have tried to listen. It may have been much more useful to figuring him out.
He's been abusing marijuana with a high THC content day and night for several years now so it'd be hard to say whether delusions are from a disorder or drug-induced, right?
I think it's honestly both, the drugs just amplified. I heard random crying fits are a side-effect of weed, so he could have also been extremely high. I listened to a Podcast on Spotify that was called the Misfits Podcast, and the host and his co-hosts told a story from when they were taking edibles. They all described feeling like they were going to die. Also described feeling heightened amounts of anxiety, and were in a dystopian world. So it's very possible it's a disorder, and the drugs took it to the 1,000th power.
The reason I had been thinking NPD is because of his sudden, daily rage bouts of rage, his sense of entitlement, his inability to accept any differing opinions and reiteration of things like, "I would know," and other similar things, and his apparent lack of empathy for the constant turmoil he alone causes, as well as his explanation that the reason he hasn't succeeded in film is because nobody understands him and people should be seeking his work without any effort made on his part.
Lack of empathy, self-entitlement, episodes of rage, etc. are common NPD symptoms. Your brother is obviously displaying these NPD symptoms. Be prepared to restrain him and take him to a hospital if they worsen.
 

New Threads

Top Bottom