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Sincerely, Your Autistic Child: What People on the Autism Spectrum Wish Their Parents Knew About Growing Up, Acceptance, and Identity Paperback – March 30, 2021

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 470 ratings
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A diverse collection of autistic voices that highlights how parents can avoid common mistakes and misconceptions, and make their child feel truly accepted, valued, and celebrated for who they are.

Most resources available for parents come from psychologists, educators, and doctors, offering parents a narrow and technical approach to autism. Sincerely, Your Autistic Child represents an authentic resource for parents written by autistic people themselves.

From childhood and education to culture, gender identity, and sexuality, this anthology tackles the everyday joys and challenges of growing up while honestly addressing the emotional needs, sensitivity, and vibrancy of autistic kids, youth, and young adults. Contributors reflect on what they have learned while growing up on the autism spectrum and how parents can avoid common mistakes and overcome challenges while raising their child.

Part memoir, part guide, and part love letter, Sincerely, Your Autistic Child is an indispensable collection that invites parents and allies into the unique and often unheard experiences of autistic children and teens.
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  1. Print length
    224 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Beacon Press
  4. Publication date
    March 30, 2021
  5. Dimensions
    5.4 x 0.65 x 8.4 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    0807025682
  7. ISBN-13
    978-0807025680
  8. See all details
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From the Publisher

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“This book is absolutely required reading for parents, educators, and caregivers who interact with anyone on the autism spectrum.”
—Library Journal, Starred Review

“Anybody who thinks differently, and anybody who loves someone who thinks differently, will find this collection invaluable.”
—Hannah Gadsby, writer and comedian

“An essential anthology edited and written by Autistic people . . . I can’t wait to share and recommend this book—what a gift.”
—Alice Wong, editor of Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-First Century

About the Author

Emily Paige Ballou is an old Millennial from the Midwest who currently lives and works in NYC, where she primarily stage manages off-Broadway new plays and new musicals, including works such as the Hello Girls with Prospect Theater Company, Nikola Tesla Drops the Beat at the Adirondack Theatre Festival, and Rose with Nora’s Playhouse. She graduated from the University of Georgia, where she was also a member of the Demosthenian Literary Society. Previous publications include pieces in the Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism, The Real Experts: Readings for Parents of Autistic Children, NeuroQueer, Barking Sycamores, and Fuckit: A Zine.

Sharon daVanport lives in the Midwest by way of their home state of Texas where they spent young adulthood writing short stories, poetry and serving as co-editor of their academic newspaper. After nearly a decade in social work, Sharon founded the Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network (AWN). Appointed by their state’s board of education, Sharon served a full term on the SILC board of directors. Publications include co-authoring a paper in Sage Pub Autism Journal, a chapter in Autistic Community and the Neurodiversity Movement: Stories from the Front Line, and pieces in Welcome to the Autistic Community, and Disability Visibility Project.

Morénike Giwa Onaiwu, MA, is a global self-advocate, educator, parent and disabled person of color in a neurodiverse, multicultural, serodifferent family. A prolific writer, public speaker, and social scientist/activist whose work focuses on meaningful community involvement, human rights, justice, and inclusion, Morénike is a Humanities Scholar at Rice University’s Center for the Study of Women, Gender, and Sexuality and a member of several executive boards. Publications include: Knowing Why: Adult-Diagnosed Autistic People on Life and Autism, All the Weight of Our Dreams: On Living Racialized Autism, and various peer-reviewed articles. Learn more at: morenikeGO.com.

Autistic Women’s Network, renamed Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network, (AWN), was founded as the first organization that focused on Autistic women, girls, and nonbinary people. They are an essential resource for autistic people, parents, and allies for dispelling stereotypes and misinformation around autism. More information can be found awnnetwork.org.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Beacon Press (March 30, 2021)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0807025682
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0807025680
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.31 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.4 x 0.65 x 8.4 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 470 ratings

About the author

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Morénike Giwa Onaiwu

Morénike Giwa Onaiwu

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Morénike Giwa Onaiwu, PhD, is a global self-advocate, educator and disabled non-binary woman of color in a neurodiverse, serodifferent family. Diagnosed with autism in adulthood after the diagnoses of their two youngest children, Morénike is a prolific writer, public speaker, social scientist/activist, and survivor whose work focuses on meaningful community involvement, inclusion, digital media, narratology, race, gender, human rights, justice, and intersectionality.

Morénike, a Black (Yoruba, Caboverdiano, American) Xennial and parent of six biological and adopted children with disabilities, is a Humanities Scholar in the Center for the Study of Women, Gender, and Sexuality at Rice University, a former full-time K-12 and college professor as well as the founder of a grassroots nonprofit, Advocacy Without Borders.

A recipient of numerous awards, Morénike is a widely sought after keynote presenter who has been an invited speaker in the White House and the UN and loves reading, writing, beaches, Steven Universe, and Dragonball Z & Super.

MorenikeGO.com (website)

@MorenikeGO (social media)

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
470 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Amanda*C
5.0 out of 5 stars Invaluable book!
Reviewed in the United States on February 22, 2024
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As parents who just stepped onto this rollercoaster ride of having a newly diagnosed kiddo on the spectrum, this book has been a godsend. It's like having a conversation with those a step or two ahead on the same journey, giving us the real lowdown about what to expect, and not from a clinical standpoint, but straight from the horse's mouth—people on the spectrum, themselves.

The letters and stories in this book pull back the curtain on the lived experiences of autistic individuals, offering insights that we never would've come across in your standard-issue pamphlet from the pediatrician's office. It's packed with honesty—some stories tug at the heartstrings, others hit you with the hard truths, and some even sprinkle in a bit of humor. And let me tell you, humor becomes a precious commodity when you're knee-deep in figuring out IEPs, therapies, and all the emotions that tag along with an autism diagnosis.

If you're looking for clinical jargon and cold, hard facts, this isn't it. But if you want to know what's going on in the minds of autistic kids as they grow up, the battles they fight, the victories they savor, and the world as they experience it, then you've got to read this book. It opens up perspectives on acceptance, identity, and the idea that being different isn't a drawback—it's a superpower if embraced and understood.

And acceptance? That's the big one. This book isn't about “fixing” our kids; it's about understanding them and reshaping our own perspectives to uplift and support their unique selves. It’s about learning to champion their differences, not stifle them.

Reading this book felt like having a long, heartfelt chat with friends who get it—friends who tell you what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear. The kind of friends who remind you that this journey, while tough, is also filled with moments of joy, pride, and unparalleled love.

So, to any parent out there facing a new autism diagnosis for their child, grab a copy of "Sincerely, Your Autistic Child." Sit down with it when the house is quiet, the kids are asleep, and let these voices help guide you towards a better understanding of your little one's world. It's an eye-opener and a companion wrapped into one. And isn't that what we all need when facing the beautiful, intricate puzzle that is autism?
One person found this helpful
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Samantha
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing.
Reviewed in the United States on February 21, 2024
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This book is great. My 4 year old son just got diagnosed and I have been desperately trying to find resources. I loved that each chapter was written by someone who is autistic. It gave a great perspective, and insight from people who are actually autistic, not people with their phd who are coming from a medical perspective.

One of the chapters has a list of things broken down with helpful tips. It's addressed for girls, but I actually typed it up to be genderless [referring to kids as kids, they] and am going to be giving it to my family and son's teachers to help. Absolutely great information.
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lestorey
5.0 out of 5 stars EXCELLENT set of essays by actually autistic writers! including trans and non-binary AFAB
Reviewed in the United States on May 31, 2022
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Very glad for this second edition from the Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network -- new title and intentional broadening from "girls and women" to more inclusive representation of assigned-female-at-birth transwomen and non-binary people. While I initially didn't think the point of view from an autistic child to their parent(s) / caretaker(s) would be of much value to me as an adult, I have found the resources provided by the publishing non-profit to be very helpful and I am always interested in autistic voices! The authors / contributors reflect a variety of intersectional identities, which provide insights for those of us who are not in a specific space (e.g., race, generation, etc) and strong moments of "I FEEL SEEN!" where I read a similar experience or wish. There is one essay by an allistic person -- a parent of an autistic person -- which I'm sure helps to frame the content for parents / caretakers of autistic people and I found to be a pretty comfortable read (versus so much other "autism mom" content I've seen online).

I recommend using the table of contents as a cue for what set of essays / which titles you would like to read -- I did not read cover-to-cover (skipped over the childhood ones) when I received the book, but chose titles which resonated for me in the moment. I've gone back to reread all of them, as the essays were all so excellent -- truly a difference to read / experience another autist's work.
8 people found this helpful
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Irina
4.0 out of 5 stars Could be more broadened in point of views
Reviewed in the United States on April 23, 2024
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I wish it also had male points of view, as I have son and the books is mainly listing the female experience. Next time please be all inclusive, the boy’s perspective could be very valuable for parents too.
One person found this helpful
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Erika Malinoski
5.0 out of 5 stars A particularly critical read for mothers of Autistic children of any gender
Reviewed in the United States on July 3, 2023
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Some reviewers have mentioned that this volume only has stories from Autistic girls and nonbinary people, but if you’re wondering how to support your Autistic son, don’t skip this book! First off, just because an issue arises most acutely for gender marginalized people (e.g. vulnerability to abuse) doesn’t mean it won’t affect boys, too. Your child’s experience will be unique to them, but starting with the perspectives in this book is very valuable.

The other reason moms in particular need to read this is because Autism has a hereditary component and girls and women are frequently undiagnosed. YOU may find that the stories in this book are eerily familiar and give you a new perspective on your own life. Even if you yourself aren’t Autistic, the writers’ observations on the way disability and sexism interact also share helpful insights on sexism. While I would like to also at some point read similar stories from boys, the focus of this book allows both common themes and diversity of experience to emerge that would be lost in a volume where a few token girls or nonbinary people had to represent their entire group. It is a very helpful book to read.
8 people found this helpful
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Lena Rotenberg
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye opening
Reviewed in the United States on May 5, 2024
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This was the first book on autism I've read and really appreciated the diversity of voices and experiences described by the many authors. I'm convinced that moving forward, for me the way to learn more is to hear directly from those that are living with ASD. Thank you to all who contributed to the making of this book.
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Alissa Fox
5.0 out of 5 stars Deeply moving
Reviewed in the United States on April 29, 2024
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I recently took a class from a mother of an autistic child. She recommended this book. This book will not disappoint.
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Top reviews from other countries

Chelsea
5.0 out of 5 stars Must read!
Reviewed in Canada on January 14, 2022
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This book… wow! I have 2 autistic kiddos and all I have to say is get this book!!! Within the first quarter of the book I not only had already self reflected with my own parenting, I learned a lot too. I feel like everyone who has an autistic loved one needs to read this book. Teachers, parents, aunts and uncles, friends, neighbours. So much insight. Highly recommend! 100% a must read!
3 people found this helpful
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Mushu
4.0 out of 5 stars It’s mainly aimed at autism in girls
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 6, 2023
Verified Purchase
It arrived today and I’m only on chapter 4 but so far it’s mainly talked about autism in Girls and “your autistic daughter”

Whilst I understand autism is not as easily recognised in girls, I think a book titled “your autistic child” should include more language aimed at either sex and not just “girls” “daughter” “woman” etc

Your autistic son needs love and understanding too
For this reason the book has lost a Star.
I’m hopeful the book will still help me gain some understanding on what my son is going through.
Customer image
Mushu
4.0 out of 5 stars It’s mainly aimed at autism in girls
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 6, 2023
It arrived today and I’m only on chapter 4 but so far it’s mainly talked about autism in Girls and “your autistic daughter”

Whilst I understand autism is not as easily recognised in girls, I think a book titled “your autistic child” should include more language aimed at either sex and not just “girls” “daughter” “woman” etc

Your autistic son needs love and understanding too
For this reason the book has lost a Star.
I’m hopeful the book will still help me gain some understanding on what my son is going through.
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4 people found this helpful
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Melli
5.0 out of 5 stars great read
Reviewed in Germany on January 16, 2022
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very interesting, insightful book!
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Rachelle bergeron
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must read for autism parents
Reviewed in Canada on April 26, 2021
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Arrived in perfect condition and quickly. I haven’t read the whole book yet but so far a great read. I will have the entire family read it as well. Perfect gift for autism parent
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K.lou
4.0 out of 5 stars Really good read
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 4, 2021
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Great read for any parent with Autism in the family
2 people found this helpful
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