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Metalhead

Metalhead

V.I.P Member
Video game and movie addict. 45 From Bedlam
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  • Metalhead
    I am finding myself fantasizing about killing myself in moments in the past that would have inflicted maximum damage against my family. This can't be healthy.
    View previous comments…
    Mr. Stevens
    Mr. Stevens
    Whenever I have similar thoughts, I try to realize it's because I feel punished for being myself. Families will do that, when they scapegoat--make you feel wrong for everything that is naturally you. And then it's natural for you to want to punish yourself since that's the only way to have control, with such people. So being where people enjoy who you are will probably help the most. I hope things improve soon.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    But seriously, you can't do this because your family would win. You can't let those nasty ones win. You have control of your life, and we all watch how you gain control back. You are a inspiration others here. Including me.
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    Nah, I wasn’t thinking about doing anything like that now. I was thinking of doing it back when my mother said her most hurtful words to me to teach her a lesson, or something like that. It’s all bull crap thinking and it’s depression talking.
    Metalhead
    A drink will only make me feel worse tonight.
    View previous comments…
    tree
    tree
    @Metalhead
    I would have recommended a drink, actually.
    Water.
    Plain or with ice. I enjoy the luxury of ice cubes.
    Frequently drinking five ounces of cold water helps me feel better
    physically/mentally/emotionally.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    I think breaking down exactly what alcohol does for you helps you understand yourself better. Does it numb you to your reality that perhaps you don't like facing right now?
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Is your sleep situation upsetting you?
    Metalhead
    Honestly I am feeling down and depressed tonight, and I know this will improve once my sleep apnea starts to get treated. I am trying not to let it get to me.
    Metalhead
    I want to party tonight. Pull out the cigars and the ginger ale. Invite friends over and watch new release movies with them. Or maybe play board games instead. Who is interested in joining me in my living room tonight?
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    If I didn't live on the other side of the country I'd pop over. Movies, smokes, and/or board games are pretty much a recipe for a good time.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Sounds good to me, we could swap bad mom stories. Lol
    Metalhead
    Slept most of the day and had super bizarre dreams that would have triggered me a couple of years ago. Now I just wake up and think - whoa, that was bizarre. Time to hit the gym again.
    Metalhead
    Went to the gym this morning, going to game by myself this afternoon. Maybe I will make myself nachos for dinner.
    Metalhead
    Game of Thrones is addictive. Lots of twists and turns and double crosses in the plot.
    Outdated
    Outdated
    The books are better, it's a shame he never finished them.
    Metalhead
    I am thinking of buying a sun lamp to help with my SAD symptoms during this time of year.
    tree
    tree
    You take Vitamin D?
    Metalhead
    Going out for Indian food after work today. Saag shrimp with a side of garlic naan. Then I am going to watch M3GAN when I get home after that.
    Metalhead
    Going to try to make my own spaghetti sauce from scratch tonight with some hot Italian sausage.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    If you throw in shredded carrots in sauce, fills you up, you need less meat. I cooked this for someone, and they liked it.
    Outdated
    Outdated
    I like making sauces for some reason, when I make pizza I use my own home made sauce.
    Aspychata
    This book may help with weight loss. It's simple, yet it helps you feel full. I know you eat meat, so it does have that. I like the pizza crust ideas, jalapeño poppers, and a lot of variety yet not Martha Stewart recipes that you need two hours just to make it

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    Metalhead
    Just spent more than two hours on the phone with a customer service agent who made Dumb and Dumber look like Stephen Hawking in comparison to her ability to do her job.
    L
    Luca
    I know I shouldn’t laugh at this because I’m sorry you had to deal with her, but that description is hilarious
    Metalhead
    OK, I have an appointment in a couple of weeks to try out different CPAP masks to find one that will work for me. I probably am going to shave my beard off in the name of getting a much better sleep. RIP beard.
    Metalhead
    Sleep apnea is one of my largest problems today, and I think it may be a contributing factor to my on and off depression the last couple of months.
    Metalhead
    I am having trouble staying awake at my desk today, and I do not know why. I know I have untreated sleep apnea, none of the masks work for me.
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