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Markness

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  • I still haven’t played Elden Ring. I don’t know if I ever will. I also can’t seem to express my interest in things without getting bullied.
    Will I ever get better? :(
    Markness
    Markness
    It’s just very difficult for me because all four of my siblings are married and have carved their niches in life. Me? I can’t even get a date and I struggle to develop any talents.
    Metalhead
    Metalhead
    I am pretty certain your siblings have various struggles of their own. And you do have talents, I can tell you write well.
    Misery
    Misery
    I've said it before and I'll say it again: You can get better, but only if you ALLOW yourself to get better. Which currently you have not done. I dont say it just to hear myself talk, you know.
    I am stuck in my car while a hailstorm is going on. :(
    L
    Luca
    I'm sorry :( It's better to be indoors than outdoors though... I think you will be safer in your car.
    Markness
    Markness
    Thank you. It happened while I was driving. It came out of nowhere!
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    TAKE A PICTURE! Dude, I hope it doesn't ding up your car, but that sounds like it would be amazing to take pictures of. I've always got a big kick out of being in inclement weather.
    I didn’t get an interview to be potentially cast in Love on the Spectrum’s upcoming season. What did I do wrong? :(
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    Email will work for me.
    L
    Luca
    I don't think you've done anything wrong. I have had applications rejected from things with a large number of applicants too, even jobs that I was "overqualified" for.
    Atrapa Almas
    Atrapa Almas
    In first season I got the impression that they just selected white skinned people from rich families. We dont know what are they looking for this season.
    I keep losing my life because of my poor health making me have to sit on the toilet for hours.
    tree
    tree
    @Markness This is something that should be correctable/manageable, if you will be open in your description
    when you consult a doctor.
    Markness
    Markness
    @tree My therapist wants me to get food like fermented yogurt and sauerkraut to help clean my gut. I got some yogurt an hour ago.
    tree
    tree
    Those are some of the same suggestions I had for you, in the past month.
    You know, you don't have to eat sauerkraut hot, right?
    That is my least favorite way to eat sauerkraut.
    I saw that the library has acquired the book Late Bloomers by Rich Karlgaard. I checked it out for myself.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Hope you enjoyed your class. Maybe your teacher is sorta okay?
    I did some morning meditation to see if it would help calm my mind.
    tree
    tree
    What does that involve?
    Markness
    Markness
    Closing my eyes and breathing mindfully.
    tree
    tree
    Being focused on breathing would tend to remove other thoughts.
    Concentrating on the in and out breaths.
    I fell asleep without my CPAP again!!!
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    Excellent!
    You're making some very real progress in a lot of areas of your life. I think you're pretty cool.
    tree
    tree
    @Gerontius and @Atrapa Almas
    He's not announcing that as a sign of progress.
    He needs the CPAP in order to have a restful night's sleep.
    Without it, the day time hours are foggy with possible headache.
    Gerontius
    Gerontius
    Oof. That's rough brother especially since you're dealing with the racing thoughts. I missed the context
    How can I feel hopeful about finding love despite my past failures?
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    You have to keep trying. I just keep trying but l fail too. But l don't let that stop me.
    tree
    tree
    @Markness "I don’t see how I can just pretend I don’t feel sad and discouraged when things don’t go my way."
    PRETENDING to not be sad is NOT the idea.
    It's ok to feel sad or discouraged. It's not ok to make it into a life mantra by continuing to recite *woe is me I've failed.*
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    It's easy to fall in that trap of feeling sorrow for yourself, but it is a trap. We are supposed to find one small thing that made us happy everyday. So yesterday, I really enjoyed my pecan coffee, today l will enjoy getting a big chore out of the way.
    I feel uneasy due to my routine having to be altered by the college course.
    tree
    tree
    Another way to say that could be:
    I will feel better once I get my routine established around that class
    I signed up for......
    I overslept again.
    tree
    tree
    Did you have to be somewhere this morning?
    Do you have an alarm clock?
    Markness
    Markness
    Not really, just woke up at 8:00 and then unintentionally fell back asleep.

    I do.
    tree
    tree
    So, you're just scolding yourself for not fulfilling an expectation
    you'd set for yourself?
    The first class is around the corner.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    This could be the start of all kinds of things. But it will be work, it will be frustrating, but just stick it out. :)
    Trying to come up with a writing sample for my introductory article for the course.
    tree
    tree
    Do you have something that you've written previously, maybe this year?
    And you could look it over, edit it some, if that seems necessary?
    Markness
    Markness
    I decided to copy and paste the first paragraph of the first short story I’ve posted here.
    Aspychata
    Aspychata
    Great!
    I had such an uncanny dream before waking up. I am noting down the details of it.
    maycontainthunder
    maycontainthunder
    Quite a few of my dreams have turned into my books. Have any of yours given you ideas for books?
    Markness
    Markness
    A lot of them have. I’ve just really struggled since the beginning of the year to shape the dreams into written/typed stories.
    maycontainthunder
    maycontainthunder
    Writer's block can be a pain. I have quite a few ideas that I can't work out how to 'end'.
    I want to cry myself to sleep.
    tree
    tree
    Is there a physical reason why your tears won't freely flow?
    Or what?
    Markness
    Markness
    I think it’s more psychological than physical. My mind just doesn’t want it to happen.
    tree
    tree
    You keep splitting yourself into sections.
    When you talk about yourself you put distance in, as if all the aspects of you
    were separate entities.
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