Procrustes was an innkeeper who adjusted his guests to their bed. Procrustes, whose name means "he who stretches," offered hospitality to travelers with a unique value proposition: a bed that exactly matched whoever lay down upon it. When the guest lay down, Procrustes racked the traveler if he was too short for the bed. If he was too long, Procrustes chopped off his legs.
This is a pretty good description of job hunting. It wasn't until I woke up thinking about this today that I realized just what a unique horror story job hunting is for the neurodiverse--especially those who can "pass" for neurotypical. It's not joke for those who can't pass; they have a different set of problems. I am writing about the special problem of this particular situation.
Employers are looking to reduce their risk of having to replace people by finding "perfect fits"--the person who blends in to the corporate culture, whose behavior will be natural and automatically reflective of what used to be called "the organization man." This is not easy for people, who often spend up to a year watching and learning how to adjust themselves so that they "match" the culture.
But you have to get in to have that chance, and that isn't necessarily a given, either.
If you're already cutting yourself to fit a neurotypical profile, the additional burden of trying to become a specific brand of neurotypical is almost a Herculean labor. Theseus himself, the hero who finally fit Procrustes to his own bed, couldn't do it.
It doesn't look so bad when you're young, pretty, and cheap; when you have energy and few responsibilities. Now imagine approaching Procrustes's inn when you have a family depending on you, when you have a home to support, when you know that the smiling innkeeper will cut you off for being too tall, too short, too old, too weird, too smart, overqualified, or otherwise "not a fit" for standards never articulated.
It is as if having cut ourselves to fit an NT profile, and cutting ourselves again to fit a company profile, and cutting ourselves to fit the job at that company, is still going to leave enough of a person left to be recognizable. And human.
Can't do it? Lose all that you have, and be mocked in the media, or despised at the grocery, because you're "too lazy to work" after cutting yourself to bits. Lose all that you have, and some dull-wit intones that you couldn't possibly be any good at business if you can't manage your own affairs. Procrustes is a myth, right?
A myth, one that we carry around with us. A truth, as myths are, because corporations have been imagining themselves as people for so long that an interview might as well be a speed-date, a job offer is a marriage contract, and no-fault divorce doesn't mean the disadvantaged ex gets alimony until finding a new partner.
I'm not arguing for longer unemployment aid, or for the inability to terminate employees who aren't working out. I am arguing for a competency-based hiring model, where "fit" is deemed as much the responsibility of the team as it is for the traveler offering services.
We cut, and we cut, and we cut. And we are cut. Different pieces are found unacceptable each time. And we wonder why we have self-esteem issues, identity crises, trouble committing to career decisions, difficulty distinguishing whether something is genuinely not working or merely situationally difficult.
It's enough to make anybody self-harm. What's a little cutting after years of living like this?
Related:
A Person Is A Person Through Other People
Twisty Little Thoughts (Continued in the Library)
Found: the Disconnected Wire in my Head
This is a pretty good description of job hunting. It wasn't until I woke up thinking about this today that I realized just what a unique horror story job hunting is for the neurodiverse--especially those who can "pass" for neurotypical. It's not joke for those who can't pass; they have a different set of problems. I am writing about the special problem of this particular situation.
Employers are looking to reduce their risk of having to replace people by finding "perfect fits"--the person who blends in to the corporate culture, whose behavior will be natural and automatically reflective of what used to be called "the organization man." This is not easy for people, who often spend up to a year watching and learning how to adjust themselves so that they "match" the culture.
But you have to get in to have that chance, and that isn't necessarily a given, either.
If you're already cutting yourself to fit a neurotypical profile, the additional burden of trying to become a specific brand of neurotypical is almost a Herculean labor. Theseus himself, the hero who finally fit Procrustes to his own bed, couldn't do it.
It doesn't look so bad when you're young, pretty, and cheap; when you have energy and few responsibilities. Now imagine approaching Procrustes's inn when you have a family depending on you, when you have a home to support, when you know that the smiling innkeeper will cut you off for being too tall, too short, too old, too weird, too smart, overqualified, or otherwise "not a fit" for standards never articulated.
It is as if having cut ourselves to fit an NT profile, and cutting ourselves again to fit a company profile, and cutting ourselves to fit the job at that company, is still going to leave enough of a person left to be recognizable. And human.
Can't do it? Lose all that you have, and be mocked in the media, or despised at the grocery, because you're "too lazy to work" after cutting yourself to bits. Lose all that you have, and some dull-wit intones that you couldn't possibly be any good at business if you can't manage your own affairs. Procrustes is a myth, right?
A myth, one that we carry around with us. A truth, as myths are, because corporations have been imagining themselves as people for so long that an interview might as well be a speed-date, a job offer is a marriage contract, and no-fault divorce doesn't mean the disadvantaged ex gets alimony until finding a new partner.
I'm not arguing for longer unemployment aid, or for the inability to terminate employees who aren't working out. I am arguing for a competency-based hiring model, where "fit" is deemed as much the responsibility of the team as it is for the traveler offering services.
We cut, and we cut, and we cut. And we are cut. Different pieces are found unacceptable each time. And we wonder why we have self-esteem issues, identity crises, trouble committing to career decisions, difficulty distinguishing whether something is genuinely not working or merely situationally difficult.
It's enough to make anybody self-harm. What's a little cutting after years of living like this?
Related:
A Person Is A Person Through Other People
Twisty Little Thoughts (Continued in the Library)
Found: the Disconnected Wire in my Head
