I see that I have made another person upset with my frank talk about writing. That is her prerogative. However, I have to ask, what would this person's reaction be if she were to get a rejection letter, as I did, suggesting very strongly that the writer sounded emotionally unstable and needed therapy? Would she be able to handle it?
Writing for the public, especially if you are writing about sensitive, emotional matters, requires a very thick skin. I am concerned that this person is investing so much of herself in her work that she will end up even more devastated and wounded when the inevitable rejections and criticisms come in. I know she is no longer listening to me. But others may be.
There is as big a difference in writing for therapy (to get over one's trauma) and writing for the public as there is between the paintings produced at wine and art parties and gallery-quality art. People who suggest that there is no difference between the two and that any story of overcome trauma is publication-worthy are not doing anyone a favor. They are being cruel and misleading and making it harder for writers to succeed by flooding the market, which is already saturated with similar tales of overcome trauma. You may think I am being cruel by stating this fact. I am not. The writing business can be brutal. Editors are not always tactful. It is this I wish to spare this person from before she bares her heart and soul.
I know this is not what she, or many others, want to hear. I know they are thinking, what a Debbie Downer. Nothing better to do than to rain on our parades. Again, that is their right. Let me just say there is no shortage of people out there willing to tell them what they want to hear and willing to take their money and waste their time and raise false hopes and make promises they can't possibly deliver. Let me ask you, is it more cruel to say, look, you are probably in the wrong game than to cheer someone on only to have them face much more brutal rejection later when they have so much more invested financially and emotionally?
I didn't like it when my fellow artist told me "it's not protocol" to ask about what it costs to produce a calendar or gift cards. But she was actually doing me a favor. By telling me this, she has alerted me that there are do's and don'ts in the art community and that a novice like me ignores them at my own peril. Likewise, there are do's and don'ts in the writing community. If a person gets angry and blows up and says "I am going to ignore that person" because that person who has actually had some experience with the writing/publishing process says something she did not like, then to be honest, that person has no business attempting to write for the public. Because that person is going to hear more and even worse out in the world. You really need to have a thick skin. Aspies Central is a safe place to write. You are protected here. Out in the public you are not, and you'd better be prepared. This is not a game for people who are not emotionally secure. They will be ripped to shreds.
Now, for the record, I did not say that this person didn't have a story worth telling. What I said, what upset her so much, is that the writing part is a very small part and you need to know how to sell your story. That unless you know exactly what you are up against and how to overcome it, you will not succeed. I am very sorry if that is upsetting news. But I don't believe in lying to people and raising false hopes.
Writing for the public, especially if you are writing about sensitive, emotional matters, requires a very thick skin. I am concerned that this person is investing so much of herself in her work that she will end up even more devastated and wounded when the inevitable rejections and criticisms come in. I know she is no longer listening to me. But others may be.
There is as big a difference in writing for therapy (to get over one's trauma) and writing for the public as there is between the paintings produced at wine and art parties and gallery-quality art. People who suggest that there is no difference between the two and that any story of overcome trauma is publication-worthy are not doing anyone a favor. They are being cruel and misleading and making it harder for writers to succeed by flooding the market, which is already saturated with similar tales of overcome trauma. You may think I am being cruel by stating this fact. I am not. The writing business can be brutal. Editors are not always tactful. It is this I wish to spare this person from before she bares her heart and soul.
I know this is not what she, or many others, want to hear. I know they are thinking, what a Debbie Downer. Nothing better to do than to rain on our parades. Again, that is their right. Let me just say there is no shortage of people out there willing to tell them what they want to hear and willing to take their money and waste their time and raise false hopes and make promises they can't possibly deliver. Let me ask you, is it more cruel to say, look, you are probably in the wrong game than to cheer someone on only to have them face much more brutal rejection later when they have so much more invested financially and emotionally?
I didn't like it when my fellow artist told me "it's not protocol" to ask about what it costs to produce a calendar or gift cards. But she was actually doing me a favor. By telling me this, she has alerted me that there are do's and don'ts in the art community and that a novice like me ignores them at my own peril. Likewise, there are do's and don'ts in the writing community. If a person gets angry and blows up and says "I am going to ignore that person" because that person who has actually had some experience with the writing/publishing process says something she did not like, then to be honest, that person has no business attempting to write for the public. Because that person is going to hear more and even worse out in the world. You really need to have a thick skin. Aspies Central is a safe place to write. You are protected here. Out in the public you are not, and you'd better be prepared. This is not a game for people who are not emotionally secure. They will be ripped to shreds.
Now, for the record, I did not say that this person didn't have a story worth telling. What I said, what upset her so much, is that the writing part is a very small part and you need to know how to sell your story. That unless you know exactly what you are up against and how to overcome it, you will not succeed. I am very sorry if that is upsetting news. But I don't believe in lying to people and raising false hopes.
