People naturally have this thing with cancer. It's remarkable. Since being diagnosed, people have given us so much stuff. And it means a lot too. During the recession, we literally had almost nothing. First the vegetables would run out, then the meat, then the beans, and then we'd watch in horror as the rice was depleted.
It's a good thing my daughter was homeschooled back then, because we slept most of the day to avoid feeling hunger pangs.
I read every book I could to discover what people ate during the depression, and what the pioneers ate to keep them alive. I read about Chinese nutrition during various famines, and on tv I'd especially pay attention to what was in those porridge mixes they were feeding to third world children.
I began cooking everything from scratch. Only buying grains and beans, with the only veggies we could afford being a head of cabbage and 5 pounds of carrots a month. I cooked like Ma Ingalls on the prairie.
And I learned very quickly that it wasn't a very nutritious diet. Maybe that's why "Baby Carrie" (a real person- the books were actually autobiographical) was so thin and sickly all the time.
I learned about herbs for food and medicine like never before. Cuttings from fir trees became our cold remedies in the winter. Leaves from the oak trees were our anti diarrheals. Bladder infections were cured with horsetail and uva ursi.
And we ate so much wild spinach, it's a shame that it's not high in protein, because that's what we needed. Learned very fast that lentils aren't the best sort of protein in the world. A steady diet of them will make you feel weak and hungry all the time, especially if they're rationed.
But my grandma made it thru the depression and WW2. I can make it thru the recession and the war with cancer.
Regardless of anyone's views on Trump, etc, it feels like the economy is in a boom time similar to the post war years. All I know is that we are eating 3 meals a day of nutritious food for the first time in many, many years. All I know is that people are supplying our every need at a time that I can barely leave the house. All I know is that "every day in every way, it's getting better and better".
I really feel blessed. And even though cancer is eating my bones, I can fight back against it with nutrition. I can blog on this computer that someone gave me. I can rest in my cozy bed that someone gave me. I can look out the back door at the car someone gave me (sure they gave me a broken down car- but a broken down car can be fixed- especially in a post war boom time). My daughter is wearing donated clothes and goes to school with a donated backpack and chromebook. I can watch tv in the living room because someone gave us a TV.
So much restoration in this time of fighting cancer, makes me know that my health too will be restored.
Oh, but then there's my daughter, 15, who's old enough to understand cancer. She's sick all the time. Her poor adrenal glands are going overboard with the fears that her mother will die. She's been overwhelmed and underslept since I told her a few months ago. It seems to be getting more routine, that this is our new reality. But teenagers are so smart, and they feel so acutely. Plus she's not an aspie, so she can better gage how I'm feeling. And that's gotta be hard. Because I'm honestly feeling scared and weak.
Chemo sucks, but God is good. Do you hear how many blessings we have just recently that we didn't a few months ago? In the storm, he has placed us in the cleft of the rock. We are weathering it out in luxury. Well, poverty to be specific.... But as luxurious as poverty has ever been to me. Maybe it's not the pre recession, everybody wears a gold chain, and Chrome spinners on your Chromed out Escalade, luxury. But it's as luxurious as I could imagine. And a double portion, over flowing of it.
God bless my daughter who is the greatest nurse I've ever known, and the most empathetic friend I've ever or will ever have. She is my reason to fight and live through horrible pain and multiple surgeries. Not to mention chemo. Yuck. I will live for you! I will fight for you!
God bless everyone who helps us.
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