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I yearn for those days

I yearn for those days of my teen years. 2016 was a turning point. I had friends I could count on. It all fell apart in an instance.

I miss that girl I would always talk to every day. The only person I ever truly fell in love with. Only she never felt the same. We stayed friends until it all fell apart.

I had plenty of friends from those days. Friends from different parts of cliques. There was Skylar, Lane, and Connor who all decided to cut me off a year after high school. There was Riker, who was a good guy but a drinker and a marijuana user. I cut him off because he fell to deep into an abyss I wasn't going to. There were many people, who were not so much as friends, but as good people seemed to care about others. These include those popular kids, Glenn, who I came to respect a lot the last years. Emily, a very kind and caring cheerleader who never looked down on others, always smiled to me and to say hello.

There are friends I still have today from those times. My twin brother, my best friend and the only one I count on today. Johnny, the friend who ran two miles non-stop from his house to stop my attempted suicide. Daniel, the most honest and hardworking immigrant who will always be there for others.

There were many times in those days I wish I never experience. But looking back, I wish I could re-live it all. It was and for the time being, the best time of my life. There are some people I wish I could talk to again. But now we are older and many have families of there own.

I hate growing old and I especially hate growing old lonely and depressed.

May God guide me to better state of life I am in now. And may He forgive me for what I've done wrong. Especially to that girl I had loved and still miss.


--This is just a rant and a plea. Ignore it. I got nothing better to do right now but reminisce about those days. I need sleep and I've been up for 24+ hours. God help me.

--This was also written on my phone through chrome. It is messy and I do not know how it will look. This whole blog was copied and pasted from a jotter pad app.

Comments

Regrets are hard as is wishing for times past, i also fear getting old and feeling sad and lonely as much as i want to have gratitude and be positive i also find this hard, hey you got your feelings out and be it 'vitual' here is a place to be heard and have a sence of connection.
 

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ryan1205
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